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6 Key Strategies for Achieving Success

Every time I tell someone that I'm writing a book onself-doubt,they say, “Oh I need that book!”Everyone experiences self-doubt at one time or another.Self-doubt might be that voice in your head that says, “Are you sure you've worked hard enough on this?” or, “Have you practiced enough?”It's normal to regularly question what we're doing and how we fit into our complex world. We’ll never eliminate self-doubt; instead we can learn how to manage it and use it as a driving force.Researchers concur that self-doubt becomes problematic onlywhen it's chronic. If you sabotage your performance with constant self-criticism, or often feel like you are an imposter and people will find you out, for example, you probably are hindered by chronic self-doubt.Below are six scientifically supported ways to manage self-doubt and use it as a constructive building block for success: 1. Re-frame difficulty as a positive forceThe other night, my niece complained that she doesn't like science class because she feels like she's “not good at it.” She added that she always has to work harder at science than her other subjects.This made me wonder: Why is it that people think something's wrong when they have to work hard and make a real effort? In one study at Stanford University led by psychology professor Carol Dweck, students in a control group learned that effort and difficulty is a normal part of growth, and should be perceived as a positive sign on the road to success. This shift in perception improved the students' academic performance and sense of wellbeing.2. Tap into past experiencesIf you’re feeling doubtful, ask yourself, “Have I ever been successful at this in the past?” If the answer is no, then ask yourself if you have ever been successful at a certain aspect of this task in the past.For example, I felt comfortable delivering workshops for years, but when people began asking me to be keynote speaker, I was terrified. After some reflection, I realized giving a keynote speech and running workshops are similar skills.Once I recognized the relevant skills I already had, I solicited help from professionals to learn the skills I still lacked. This improved not only my competence, but also my confidence.3. Practice self-compassionAccording to self-compassion researcher Kristin Neff, people who are more compassionate toward themselves have greater self-confidence. Those who don’t berate themselves when things go wrong are more likely to persist and take the risks needed to progress because they are less afraid of failure. “When it’s safe to fail, it’s safe to try.” Says Neff. (To learn more, watch my interview with Dr. Neff.)4. Doubt your doubtsOften when we embark on something new, negative thoughts can take over. “Who are you to think you can do this? ... Who cares about what you have to say?”I used to be the queen of negative self-talk. I learned to talk back to those undermining thoughts by asking: “Is this true?” Identify what your negative inner voice is saying, and then evaluate it from an objective point of view.More often than not, that little voice in our heads is spouting more fiction than fact. What's more, you can counter that inner critic with objective, rational and affirmative thoughts.5. Stop ruminatingExcessive thinking about what you should have done differently in the past can bleed into the present. So if you are stuck in negative ruminations about the past as you’re faced with a new task, you actually reduce your ability to focus on your present performance.To stop ruminating about times when my performance was disappointing, I say to myself, “I did my best with what I knew at the time.” Then I analyze what I think I could have done differently and I move on. (The moving on part is key.)6. Don't make your self-worth contingent on your accomplishmentsAmerican culture often perpetuates the idea that our worth is contingent upon our ongoing accomplishments. When we are succeeding, our self-worth goes up, and when we are failing, we feel worthless. People who do not tie their self-worth to their accomplishments in fact see failure on the same continuum as success—as a necessary step to ultimate achievement of goals.Rather than a reflection of how unworthy we are, failure can be a sign that we are still learning or have picked the wrong strategy for the circumstances. I try to remember what Maya Angelou once said: “I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”Louisa Jewellis the president of theCanadian Positive Psychology Association, as well as a speaker, author, and instructor of psychology at the University of Toronto.

Workplace

5 Steps to Establishing Clear Boundaries at Work

Live Happy blogger, best-selling author and workplace wellbeing coach MichelleMcQuaid presents this series of interviews entitled "Show Up, Shine and Succeed." This is the last of five insightful, informative posts, each with a differentpositive psychology expert speaking on topics related to happiness, confidence and success in the workplace.Do you have trouble saying “no” to people at work? Many of us find setting boundaries to be a challenge.Yes, I can take on that extra project, although my days are already too full. Yes, I can have that difficult conversation, even though it’s your responsibility and not mine.Yes, I can work over the weekend, even though my family and friends had plans.Sound familiar ?“Learning to set and keep clear boundaries with your boss and colleagues is essential if you want to remain happy and productive at work,” explains best-selling author and productivity coach Valorie Burton.Click here to listen to the full podcast.“Boundaries are a definition. Think of it like owning a house; your property has a specific boundary around that property. Everything inside the boundary is your responsibility, and what’s outside is not,” suggests Valorie.“When we begin to blur those lines, we find ourselves in situations that become very frustrating.”Setting boundaries means learning when to say no. It means asking for the respect we want, and balancing our needs and responsibilities. Valorie recommends trying these five steps to effectively setting boundaries at work:1. Establish your boundariesStart by asking yourself, what are the boundaries you need to protect your own happiness at work. Try to clearly envision what it would be like if these boundaries were respected and gracefully enforced. Ask yourself: “What does that give me? How does it feel when I am operating at my optimal potential?”Then notice the areas where you currently feel frustrated, stressed or overwhelmed, and how, when and by whom these boundaries are being crossed.2. Challenge the stories that hold you backWhen it comes to setting boundaries, we often catastrophize about the consequences of saying ‘no’ to other people at work. It takes a lot of courage to sit down with your boss and say, “I need to do this differently. Can we talk this through?” What if it upsets them, or even puts your job at rish? Ask yourself: “What am I afraid will happen if I do?” Make the space for self-reflection and write out what you need to say this person to help you feel more confident about honoring the boundaries you require to maintain your happiness and success at work.3. Start with one conversationDon't try to set all your boundaries at once. Take it one conversation at a time and practice identifying, asking for and keeping a boundary. Notice what works, adjust what doesn’t and keep moving forward to make these conversations an effective part of the way you work.4. Enforce your boundariesCreate a plan of action for what will happen when your boundaries are crossed. Be sure to compassionately let people know when you feel your boundaries are not being respected (most people will mean no malice, but may be unaware of the impact their behavior is having on you). Communicate clearly what choices you will need to make in order to honor the boundaries you’ve set to ensure you can successfully support yourself, your team and your organization.5. Pay attention to what worksWhen you begin progressing and setting better boundaries, give yourself credit for each step forward. You’ll find, just like a baby learning to walk, from time to time you may stumble. Setting boundaries takes practice so give yourself permission to keep learning and growing knowing that this is a skill vital for your success and happiness.For more ways to approaches to set boundaries successfully at work be sure to visit Valorie’s website at www.valorieburton.com and check out her wonderful books for creating happiness at work and in life.And if you’d like more tested, practical ways to show up, shine and succeed at work visit https://www.showupshineandsucceed.com.

Self-Care

5 Ways to Turn Tiny Habits into Big Changes

Live Happy blogger, best-selling author and wellness coachMichelleMcQuaidpresents a series of interviews entitled "Show Up, Shine and Succeed." This is the fourth of five insightful posts. Each podcast/interview features a differentpositive psychology expert, all speaking on topics related to happiness, confidence and success in the workplace. Have you ever stumbled across a great idea that could make you more effective in your career—and promised yourself that you’ll get started on it later? Break a big change into small, manageable pieces We all find reasons to put off making the positive changes, even if we know they will help us in the long run. Despite our best intentions, we get distracted, life interrupts us, we become too busy and the very idea of trying to do one more thing is completely overwhelming. “While many people talk about behavior change as being hard, it’s actually not hard if you do it in the right way, by creating tiny habits,” explains BJ Fogg, an experimental psychologist at Stanford University, who has proposed the concept of "Tiny Habits" as a way of overcoming our usual obstacles to change. Click here to listen to the full podcast. “Tiny habits help you scale back bigger behaviors into really small behaviors and sequence them into your life where they can be easily accommodated,” said BJ. “They rely less on willpower and motivation and more on redesigning your life little by little, so over time these small shifts create dramatic results.” How to get started Given that researchers estimate 40% of our day consists of mere habits, it seems reasonable to try to hack some of these routines to create the kind of changes we want to make in our work and life. For example, let’s say you want to finally read the pile of articles and books growing next to your desk to improve your expertise in a key area of your work. Applying BJ’s formula for making small changes, you might create a tiny habit by taking the following steps: 1, Scale back change to something very small If something is very simple to do, you’ll need far less motivation and will power to follow through. Also, scaling down a task to something small helps remove all those “too busy right now” excuses. When you actually do it, you create feelings of success that can be built upon. Rather than trying to get through the whole pile, try setting yourself the goal of reading ten pages each day to get started. 2. Find time for your new behavior Look for time when this small new behavior fits naturally into your day. Try to find an existing recurring activity that would be a good match for the new behavior you’re trying to create. It might be first thing in the morning when you turn on your computer, or when you stop to eat lunch. 3. Create a tiny habit recipe Program your tiny habit so you know exactly what you need to be doing and when you need to do it. Use this formula to make it easy: After I (insert existing routine), I will (insert new routine). It might be: After I turn on my computer at work, I will read ten pages from the pile. If the habit isn’t working try shrinking the change even further, try an alternative routine to anchor your new habit to and ensure your new routine is well matched to the anchor you’ve chosen. If you’re too focused on answering all your emails in the mornings to enjoy reading a better recipe might be: After I sit down to eat my lunch, I will read one page from the pile. 4. Celebrate your success Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool. You can help make small behaviors more automatic and make yourself want to stick with them by rewarding yourself. When you complete your tiny habit, take a minute to metaphorically pat yourself on the back or use another form of affirmation to show yourself that this a behavior you’re proud of, and to make it something you’re more likely to keep doing. 5. Build your habit day-by-day As your habit begins to stick, expand on it as required. Build the habit a little bit at a time, without compromising your ability to get started each time. Maybe try reading two pages a day, then three pages a day, perhaps even four or five. What tiny habits can you utilize to increase your successes at the office and in life? If you’d like help to walk through this recipe step-by-step, visit tinyhabits.com and join one of the weekly tiny habit programs or get trained to be a coach. And if you’d like more tested, practical ways to show up, shine and succeed at work visit showupshineandsucceed.com.

Workplace

5 Steps to a More Courageous You

Live Happy blogger, best-selling author and workplace wellbeing coach MichelleMcQuaid presents this series of interviews entitled "Show Up, Shine and Succeed." This is the second of five insightful, informative posts. Each podcast/interview features a differentpositive psychology expert, all speaking on topics related to happiness, confidence and success in the workplace.At work, are you more driven by what inspires you or what scares you?Margie Warrell, best-selling author and coach, puts it this way: “ ‘For the sake of what?’ are you willing to speak up at work, transition your career, start a new business or take on a big job?” All of these things involve risk; what would motivate you to take on that kind of risk? Once you identify that, you can find the courage to make those changes.Fear keeps us small and stuck in jobs that don’t fulfill us, but make us feel safe. But is there really anything safe about living a life in which you feel disengaged, disillusioned or desperate to be doing something else?“In order for you to get outside your comfort zone and stop playing small and safe, you need to have a clear purpose,” said Margie, when I interviewed her recently.Click here to listen to the full podcast.Feel the fear and do it anyway“Courage isn’t the absence of fear,” explains Margie. “Rather, courage is action in the presence of our fears and self-doubts.”When we act by starting with small steps over time, we become more courageous. Our fears don’t run our lives, and we’re much more driven by what inspires us than by what scares us.However, we tend to overestimate the probability that something will go wrong and underestimate our ability to handle the consequences of risk. These factors drive us to avoid the actions we really need to take—not stick ourselves out there and speak up.‘For the sake of what?’There is a big difference between being well off and having wellbeing. It’s easy to mislead ourselves that if we just had the success we wanted, it would be simple to develop our strengths—to show up and shine in ways that truly matter.But that actually works in reverse. Only when you can answer “for the sake of what” clearly will you be willing to put yourself at risk, truly courageous and as purposeful and successful as you can be.According to Margie, taking the following steps will help you to stop playing safe and find the courage to do what really matters to you at work:1. Be aware of your impactBecome aware of the impact you have on others simply by the spirit you bring to what you do. You may not be living out your greatest passion each day. But if you bring a spirit of engagement to what you do, you show others that what you do each day matters.2. Understand what drives youWhy would you bother to speak up at work, start a new career or take on a new job? What would it take for you to risk leaving your comfort zone? Once you identify that “why,” you will have the clear-eyed determination to go for it. 3. Find your purposeDiscover the intersection of your talents, passions, values and skills so that what you do every day is meaningful. There may be things you are passionate about, but you might lack relevant skill at the moment. Or there may not be an opportunity—or perhaps if you pursued this passion as a vocation, it might compromise the family stability you value.Purpose is rarely about all or nothing. Rather, it’s about finding an intersection between what you’re good at and care about with value and need in the marketplace. That intersection creates opportunities to combine them.4. Cultivate a courage mindsetEmbrace the discomfort that comes with feeling vulnerable by doing things that expose you to failure. As you become more certain what you want to do with your life, don’t start by taking on Mount Everest. Courage builds, so start where you are and do something today that stretches you. When you encounter setbacks, pick yourself up and figure out what the next step should be. It's also important to surround yourself with others who are courageous, conscious and committed—people who lift you up instead of pull you down.5. Tame your inner criticWe all have a voice inside our head that say, “Who are you to do that? You’re not good enough. What will people say if you fail?” Try saying, “Thank you very much. I know you’re trying to protect me ... Now be quiet, I’m going to take this risk anyway.”Find more practical strategies to help implement these ideas in Margie’s best-selling book Stop Playing Safe and at margiewarrell.com.And if you’d like more tested, practical ways to show up, shine and succeed at work visit showupshineandsucceed.com.

Workplace

Michelle Gielan: Be a Happiness Broadcaster

On Thursday, September 25, Live Happy CEO Kym Yancey spoke with happiness researcher and former CBS anchorwoman Michelle Gielan. Here is a brief excerpt from their talk: Starting with good news I was working as a national news anchor for CBS—my dream job—but those were difficult economic times, and thenewscast was a constant barrage of negative stories; it seemed like there was no break from them. So we decided to do a series of interviews on how to foster greater happiness, even in the middle of challenging times: Not waiting helplessly until they’re over, but maintaining the belief that our behavior matters. And we interviewed experts who could tell people how to put the tips and advice into practice. I decided I wanted to investigate positive psychology. What I came to learn is that, even in the midst of challenging times, I believe that my behavior matters. I believe I have the resources and social support system that can help me through it. When we have those things, our brains switch off the fight or flight reaction; switch off the panic button. Tabling it Lately I really like the concept of “Tabling it.” I have a little baby who is seven months old, so there are times when I am literally walking around like a zombie. My brain can get latched onto a negative thought and I start ruminating over and over.And I say to myself, we’ve been through this before; let’s table it. Let’s come back to it after we’ve slept for eight hours. And nine times out of 10, it’s not even an issue in the morning. Or else by then, I have the mental bandwidth to deal with it and find a solution. Become a positivity broadcaster I worked in television news, but what I’ve found is that in life, we are all broadcasters. We broadcast thoughts in our own minds, and we also broadcast while talking to other people. Any of that can be positive or negative. And what we put out there comes back to us.We have the power to shift and redirect the conversation to help others reorient to the positive. Positivity tips: Have the faith, don’t give up, and the changes start to take place. Cultivating an optimistic mindset fuels our success. Sharing with others multiplies the effect. The greatest predictor of happiness is the belief that positive change is possible. What can we do to spread happiness today? I want everyone to be a positive broadcaster today. Send a 2-minute positive email and tell them why you appreciate them. Post a positive Facebook post; social media has a huge impact on people these days. Last, next time someone asks you how are you, say something positive, deep and meaningful to connect you to that person. Neutrality (“I’m fine …”) is a wasted opportunity. Michelle Gielan is a partner atGoodThink, a positive psychology consulting firm, and an expert on the science of positive communication and how to use it to fuel success.She is also is an executive producer ofThe Happiness Advantagespecial on PBS, and formerly served as the anchor of two national newscasts at CBS News, as well as a correspondent forThe Early Show.

Workplace

Gretchen Rubin: Change Habits to Boost Happiness

OnWednesday, September 24, Live Happy CEO KymYanceyshared a morning conversation with happiness guru and best-selling author Gretchen Rubin.Here is a brief recap of their talk: If you had to pick one key to happiness, what would you say? Ancient philosophers and current psychologists agree: Strong, healthy relationships are incredibly important to our happiness. To be able to give and get support is just crucial. So if you want to put your time, energy or money into boosting happiness, use it to strengthen and broaden close relationships. Where do we start to make ourselves happier? Start with yourenergy. When you have more energy, it’s easier to do the things you want to do—but are often too tired to do! For example, you might want to throw a dinner party, go out more, or exercise. People think they are too tired to exercise, but in fact exercise gives us more energy. You don’t have to train for a marathon—even a walk outside is great. This seems so simple and obvious, but youneedto get enough sleep; we need 7-8 hours of sleep. People think they’re okay with less, but they are really impaired. Many of us do not get enough sleep. It’s hard to give up that time at night, the fun, goof-off time. Most of us are hung up on losing 10 pounds, and don’t realize that the benefits of exercise are immediate. I've heard people say, 'You exercise for sanity, not vanity.' If you want to lose weight, you have to look at what you’re eating. Research shows that people who exercise will help you maintain your weight, but not lose it. What is the relationship between Happiness and Habits? If you want to form your habits, first you need to figure yourself out. What drives you? What do you enjoy? Do you thrive on competition; do you do better when you give up something altogether, or does a more moderate approach work. How do you help someone else be happier? The truth is that you can’t change someone else, you can only change yourself. But I find that if I change myself, relationships change, and the atmosphere of my home changes. It's not always possible to be happy, but we can try to be as happy as we canunder the circumstances. We can always look for reasons to be grateful. GRETCHEN RUBIN is the best-selling author of The Happiness Project and Happier at Home, and is currently working on her latest book, Better Than Before, scheduled for release in 2015. She is considered one of the most influential writers on happiness today, and has become an in-demand speaker and keynoter.Gretchen has also made appearances on the Today show, CBS Sunday Morning and Booknotes. You can readabout Gretchen’s adventures in the pursuit of happiness and habits on her blog at GretchenRubin.com.

People

Grace and Gratitude

Olivia Newton-John is a flirt. On a recent Friday night, she begins her“Summer Nights” show at The Flamingo in Las Vegas by shimmying tothe edge of the stage as she sings theopening bars to her epic hit “Have YouNever Been Mellow.”Hopelessly devoted fansThe sold-outaudience of 750 rises to their feet. Then,as they settle back down, Olivia coos,“I’m going to do a couple of songs froma movie where I got to dance with…”Everyone jumps up again, eruptinginto gleeful whoops. They anticipate, ofcourse, that she will finish that sentencewith “John Travolta” and launch intotheir favorite tunes from Grease, her1978 U.S. film debut that made her asuperstar and remains the highest grossingAmerican movie musical ofall time.Olivia pauses, dropping her mic toher hip as she soaks in the adulation.After a few seconds, she smilesbrilliantly and continues. “A moviewhere I got to dance with…Gene Kelly.”If Olivia is toying with her fans as sheresumes her “musical journey” with thetitle song from Xanadu, they are morethan happy to be her playthings. Somehave paid up to $250 for a ringside seatand the chance to have their phototaken with her during a meet and greet.Timeless beauty and talent“She was my first crush,” says a middle-aged man from Seattle who hasbrought along the Xanadu LP for Oliviato sign. A Los Angeles film professorwho lived for several months inAustralia carries a glossy photo ofOlivia, vintage mid-’80s. He remembersgoing to see her perform when he washomesick. “She made me feel at home,”he says.For generations of admirers, OliviaNewton-John has provided thesoundtrack to their lives. They mighthave shared a first kiss to “If You LoveMe, Let Me Know,” become engaged to the strains of “I Honestly Love You”and hit the ballroom floor for their first dance as a married couple to thewedding band staple “Hopelessly Devoted to You.”Back in the early ’80s,some ventured nervously into their firstaerobics class, inspired by Olivia’sadmonition, “Let’s get physical,physical.” (“I’m proud of that song,” shetells the audience, conspiratorially. “Inmy whole career, it was the only songthat was ever banned.”)When facing aloss later in life, many found comfort insongs like “Let Go Let God” or “Learn to Love Yourself” from Olivia’s deeplyspiritual 2006 album Grace andGratitude, featuring instrumentals andvocals for meditation and healing.Still creative and vibrant at 65If there’s a timeless quality to hersongs, the same can be said of Olivia herself. Dressed in an elegant blacktuxedo with peg-legged pants andhigh-heeled ankle boots, her blondehair in a shoulder-length bob, it’s difficult to comprehend that it’s been36 years since her Sandy Olsson first fellin love with John Travolta’s DannyZuko. At 65, Olivia says she has neverfelt healthier, more vibrant or,especially, more creative.

People

Shawn Achor: What Can You Do Now to Be Happier?

On Monday, September 22, Live Happy CEO shared a morning phone conversation with happiness expert Shawn Achor. Here is a brief recap of their talk: How do you define Happiness in your research? Some people would define happiness as pleasure; but pleasure is fleeting. We want to redefine happiness. We can go back to the ancient Greek definition of happiness: The joy that you feel when you are striving toward your potential. How to be an optimist People often focus on the negative as a default, such as, “I’ll be happy when work is over today.” If you do that, you are relegating the rest of your time at work to negativity. The top 10% of happy people are not happy all the time. This morning you have a choice: you can look at the emails in your inbox and see it as a drudgery or as a way to connect with other people. If people choose to focus on the positive, you are better at dealing with that inbox and feel better after. If you choose to see washing dishes as an act of love toward your family, you might feel rejuvenated afterward.First you make the choice to be happy, then you will improve your day, improve your life. When negative things happen, they trick your brain, making you think that things will always be this way. A pessimist looks at something negative and says, “this is always happening, this is going to ruin my entire day.”An optimist sees it as, “this too will pass.” Their brain is fueled by gratitude and positivity. What are some easy steps we can take to make ourselves happier? Some things you can do starting now to make yourself and others happier: Train your brain for 21 days in a row to think of three new things you are grateful for. When you do this, your brain releases dopamine that floods your system, turning the learning centers on. Energy rises, every single educational and business outcome improves when you start out your morning on a positive note. Other habits: take two minutes to think of one meaningful experience you had the day before. Your brain thinks it experienced that great moment again. That’s the fastest intervention we’ve found. 15 minutes of exercise is the equivalent of taking an antidepressant. 2 minutes of meditation is also incredibly helpful. Write a 2-minute praising or thanking someone else. Social connection is as predictive of longevity as smoking, blood pressure, etc. Improving our social relationships The breadth, depth, and meaning in your relationships are all important. In terms of breadth, expand the number of people you smile at in the street and the supermarket; this creates a feedback loop of positivity. For depth: really be present with your children, your spouse. What can we do today to make massive ripples and impacts to improve other people’s happiness? Write a two-minute text or email messages praising someone you know. Take the idea that happiness is a choice and share the knowledge that you are learning from Live Happy to someone else you know. Share some positive research with someone you know. Be the first to say good morning, hello—give a smile.

Workplace

Show Up and Succeed

Recent polls show that two out of every three people report feeling disengaged in their jobs; many of us would simply like to be more inspired by our work.Perhaps you’re hoping for that extra bit of confidence to ask for a promotion. Maybe you’d like to be able to enjoy your work more, no matter what you’re doing or whom you’re working for. Or could it be that you hope others around you will finally recognize your skills and talents and reward you fairly for them.For many of us it’s as simple as having a bit more energy, feeling a little happier and finally being able to create the success we know we’re capable of. But what are the tested and practical approaches you can use to show-up, shine and succeed at work?Podcast series focuses on happiness and success in the workplaceEvery day next week, from September 29 to October 3, Live Happy will feature a podcast and blog in which work/wellness expert Michelle McQuaid discusses different aspects of workplace success and happiness. Five podcasts will feature five prominent experts in the field, each addressing a different perspective on how we can become more engaged and be inspired by our work.Louisa JewellPositive psychology expert Louisa Jewell notes that our sense of self-worth often impacts how we feel about our work. “Self-doubt causes us to engage in self-protective strategies at work like procrastination, hesitation and self-handicapping that hold us back from achieving the results we long for,” explains Louisa.Self-doubt is an internal phenomenon that reflects the way you talk to yourself. You can counter it with awareness, disputing the negative self-talk, and with a healthy dose of self-compassion. Increasingly studies find that self-doubt is generated by the social evaluations of others and the commentary that surrounds us.So how can you maintain your confidence in the face of other people’s criticism?Margie WarrellCourage coach and best-selling author Margie Warrell recommends making sure you are driven by what inspires you and not by what scares you.“In order for you to get outside your comfort zone and stop playing small and safe, you need to have a clear purpose,” said Margie. “Try to find what it is you are willing to speak up about at work. If you think through how you might want to transition your career, start a new business or take on a great big job when there’s more chance of you failing than the one you’re in right now.”Only when you can answer clearly ‘for the sake of what’ you’re willing to put yourself at risk, can you be as courageous as you can be, as purposeful as you can be and as successful as you can be.But will you have the grit to sustain your efforts?Angela DuckworthAngela Duckworth,Associate Professorat the University of Pennsylvania defines grit as the passion and perseverance for long-term and challenging goals. It's being inclined to really stick with a couple of things you care about and work hard towards them over weeks, over years and even decades.“Gritty people have placed extremely high values on their goals, and they understand that to accomplish anything worthwhile is going to require extraordinary investment,” explains Angela. “As a result they value habits, and accept that feelings of frustration are a normal part of growth.”But how can you develop positive habits when your time at work and home is already maxed out?B.J. FoggBehavioral psychologist B.J. Fogg, professor at Stanford University is dedicated to finding small changes that make improving our behavior easier.“Tiny habits help you scale back bigger behaviors into many small behaviors and sequencing it somewhere in your life that fits well. It relies less on willpower and motivation to create change and more on redesigning your life little by little so over time these small shifts create dramatic results.”For example, if you want to finally read the pile of articles and books growing next to your desk, then you could create a tiny habit recipe like this: After I turn on my computer at work, I will read one page. Then as the habit becomes routine, let it grow day by day until you’ve worked your way through the pile and are looking for new things to read.Once they start to stick though how will you protect your tiny habits from everyone else’s demands on your time and energy?Valorie BurtonBest-selling author and productivity coach Valorie Burton recommends setting and keeping clear boundaries with your boss and colleagues if you want to remain productive and happy at work.“Start by asking yourself, what are the boundaries you need to set in order to protect your own peace, joy and serenity at work,” suggests Valorie. “Choose the areas where you most feel the need for change and then ask yourself what conversation is it time to have?”To help you build up the courage, confidence and energy to take each of these steps, take the time to clarify in your own mind what it would take for you to show up, shine and succeed in ways that unleash your true potential at work.Sign up for the podcasts to be delivered to your inboxIf you’re ready to feel more engaged and inspired about your work, and to learn practical strategies for flourishing from top experts in the field, be sure to join Louisa, Margie, Angela, B.J. and Valorie for this special series of interviews. Sign up by clicking here to have the podcasts sent directly to your inbox, beginning on Monday, September 29th, or simply visit LiveHappy.com to access the podcasts and accompanying blog.

Practice

A Day of Rest

In the Jewish tradition, the 24-hour period from sundown on Friday to sundown on Saturday is known as Shabbat, or the Sabbath—the holiest part of the week. During that time, observant Jews do not use electricity, take photographs, drive a car or do many other things, as mandated in the Torah. On Friday nights, families eat a special dinner together, light candles, say prayers and eat challah bread to celebrate this time of rest and reflection.But you don't need to be Jewish—or religious at all—to find the benefit of incorporating a “day of rest” into your own busy life, or to be inspired by some of these ancient traditions.Taking a time-out from technologyRebecca Reice, a rabbi-educator at the Reform Jewish Congregation Beth Torah in Overland Park, Kansas, was worried that taking a day off from answering work emails and doing housework can seem impossible and even counterproductive in our hyper-busy world. Reice wanted her congregation to try it, but wasn’t sure they were ready to give up their modern conveniences, so she challenged herself to try unplugging first. "Years ago, I came to the realization that I am a time-obsessed person,” she says. “I’m always checking my watch or phone, checking my calendar to stay on track and pack everything into overfilled days." By taking off her watch on Friday evenings and living in the moment instead of worrying about what she needed to do next, Rebecca found deeper connections with her friends and community. Her congregants then picked up the challenge themselves.Shabbat, minus the religion partRebecca isn’t the only one reconfiguring what the idea of Shabbat means outside of religious practice. Marilyn Paul, author of the self-help/personal-organizing bookIt's Hard to Make a Difference When You Can't Find Your Keys, is currently working on a book about how Jews and non-Jews alike can incorporate rest, relaxation and renewal into their weekly routines.According to Paul, many people find that, as much as they would like to embrace the concept of Shabbat, they find it incompatible with modern working life. For some, it takes something serious, such as a major illness or injury, to force them to rethink their true priorities and how they spend their time.Paul suggests people stop looking at Shabbat as a list of things you can’t do and see Shabbat as a list of things you can, such as read a book, take a nap and spend meaningful time with your family.“Think through what is actually restful and nourishing and renewing for you,” she says. “One question is, what really satisfies you? Ask what would really feed your soul and feel great. Renewing and de-stressing are a practice.”Take time to rest and reconnectHer sentiment is echoed by Rabbi Jessica Minnen, the director of content and training for StartUp Shabbat, a New York-based initiative that encourages people to think about Shabbat as an opportunity for increased mindfulness.“It is a day to break from the work you usually do, but it is also a day to do things you don't usually get to,” she points out. “Read a novel. Bake a cake. Play outside. Sleep!”Says Jessica, “Think of Shabbat as a day of recharging. For me, that might mean yoga class or group meditation. For you, that might mean Friday night dinner with friends or a concert in the park with your family.”This weekly downtime can also be a time to think about the less fortunate, realize how grateful you are for the people around you, and think of ways to give back.According to Minnen, when you have a day of mindfulness, “Time becomes more valuable, you feel more present in the space you occupy, your spiritual life develops and your relationships grow.”Lilit Marcus is a New York City-based writer and tea addict. Her first book,Save the Assistants: A Guide to Surviving and Thriving in the Workplace, was published by Hyperion. You can also look for her work in theWall Street Journal,Teen Vogue, and Elle.com. Her sister says she dresses like a librarian.@lilitmarcus

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