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Acts of Thanksgiving

We all seek unity, interconnectedness and happiness, but we have come to associate feelings of warmth and gratitude mainly with Thanksgiving, other holidays and major life events.As a therapist and believer in the importance of living a fulfilling and contented life, I encourage everyone I meet to start practicing active thanksgiving that goes well beyond the November holiday and religious services. This is not about feeling thankful when something great happens, but a regular part of every day—even the most challenging ones—especially unhappy days!In my work, I see many people in pain, struggling to cope daily. They may be dealing with a terminally ill parent, a child facing problems in school, an unwanted divorce or the loss of a friend or financial investments.It is difficult to introduce the benefits of thanksgiving to someone in crisis.That is why I encourage everyone to learn and use this tool immediately and often. Thanksgiving as a consistent part of your life will not only bring in more positive experiences, but it willarm you with stronger defenses for the hard times that are inevitable in life.Even when things seem to be hummingalong, it is easy to become discouraged by simply watching the news or reading something tragic. It is easy to feel overwhelmed and helpless in this hyper-connected world we all live in.Thanksgiving will help you tune out the disconcerting chatter in your head and promote a sense of calm and focus.By consciously focusing on those people who give us support and care; life circumstances that make us feel lucky and blessed; and any experiences that bring us joy and satisfaction, we are sure to find ourselves in a happier, more productive state. Once you have experienced the positive effects of thanksgiving, you can deliver what I like to call conscious acts of gratitude. Here are some of my favorites:Social media shoutouts—public thanks to a friend who helped you, a mate who made you smile, a child who has made you proud.Gushing appreciation notes—Post-its, Post-its, everywhere! Grab a stack of those little sticky notes and write terms of endearment on 10 or 20. Hide them around the house. Leave the recipient wondering, “Will this gushing of appreciation ever end?”Take it upon yourself to do someone’s mundane household chore. Do this act quickly, quietly and as an expression of gratitude–not to score points or earn some gratitude of your own, but to show that someone cares enough to take a task off their list.Do something that’s surprising or special—bring someone a book from a favorite author or a trail of rose petals leading up to their door with a sign that says“Thank You!”Thanksgiving is not necessarily directed at another person. It is a state of mind to be cultivated inside your own head.If you practice regularly thinking thankful thoughts, they will lighten your mood and likely put a smile on your face–whether anyone knows you are doing it or not. Giving thanks works as a magnet: It redirects your feelings into a positive zone.Most of us know that having a positive state of mind is good for us emotionally, psychologically, physically and spiritually. There are also often secondary gains as well. Your upbeat state of mind can impact how others feel about you and treat you.Last fall, I worked with a client I’ll call Karen. Karen was a 42-year-old single woman who almost always spent the holidays alone. When we met in October, Karen was depressed. Another holiday season was fast approaching, and she was certain she would be by herself. She spent her first session with me talking about her isolated and lonely life, her failed relationships, her financial struggles and her dead-end job. Apparently, Karen was thankfulfor nothing.Still, after some probing, I discovered that she had two friends whom she felt close to; she really liked her boss and she loved listening through her apartment wall to her neighbor playing the piano. I assigned Karen to practice thanksgiving daily toward one of the few precious things in her life we had discovered. She was then to perform some conscious act of gratitude. By December, each person in her life she was thankful for had invited her to an activity over the holidays, and she had even found herself a loveinterest!Welcoming thanksgiving and gratitude into your life promotes feelings of calm and warmth. Thanksgiving makes you feel more motivated, enthusiastic, driven and satisfied. It wards off the blues and negative thinking. People who have an established thanksgiving ritual enjoy more friends, less conflict at work, raise happier children and enjoy more satisfying romantic relationships.Thanksgiving requires very little time, money or skill, yet offers enormous rewards.Don’t just take my word for the magic that comes out of thanksgiving. Make a commitment that you will find a way to observe the wonderful and meaningful people and parts of your life, and give thanks every day for a week…you’ll see what happens.In case you were wondering, I personally count my blessings and give thanks every single day. And so I don’t give Turkey Day short shrift, I count everything I’m thankful for on that daytwice!Stacy Kaiser is a successful Southern California-based licensed psychotherapist, author, relationship expert and media personality. With more than 100 television appearances on major networks, including CNN, NBC, CBS and FOX, Stacy has built a reputation for bringing a unique mix of thoughtful and provocative insights to a wide range of topics. You can learn more about Stacy on her website.

Self-Care

Live Happy Magazine Launches to Help Readers Live a Happier Life

Happiness is Happening: $11.17 Billion Being Spent Annually on Self-ImprovementDALLAS, TX, October 22, 2013 – The facts show that now more than ever, the concept of achieving personal happiness is at an all-time high. People are looking to family, relationships, careers and personal achievement, desperately seeking happiness, but finding more questions than answers. The new Live Happy magazine and website, launching today, will be the first lifestyle magazine completely dedicated to sharing information and resources to assist in our timeless pursuit of happiness.The premier issue of Live Happy magazine addresses the globally growing interest in happiness. Harvard offers a course in happiness which is the most popular to date. Universities are now also teaching positive psychology, as countries around the world appoint happiness chiefs and change policies to help raise overall happiness levels of their populations. No longer the domain of philosophers, academics and researchers, the journey to happiness is within everyone’s reach. Live Happy is the first magazine ever to balance the science of positive psychology with the art of application, making happiness accessible to everyone.Helmed by veteran Editor in Chief Karol DeWulf Nickell, formerly editor in chief of Better Homes and Gardens and at Reader’s Digest Association, Live Happy addresses the universal concept that people want happiness for themselves, their children and the world. Live Happy will continually offer practical tools to help their readers achieve authentic happiness.Each Live Happy issue will feature happiness-enhancing stories and articles that offer timely advice and real solutions for readers who want to be happy, including:The Science and Practice of Happiness – Happiness is a scientifically proven predictor and precursor to success, as shown through content developed from the thousands of scientific studies and decades of research by well-respected experts such as Dr. Martin Seligman, Dr. Jane Dutton, Dr. Barbara Fredrickson and Shawn Achor.Celebrity Interviews – Celebrities, business leaders and other public figures will share their secrets for overcoming obstacles, staying positive through challenges and maintaining happiness throughout their life journeys. The premier issue debuts with exclusive insights from Academy Award-winning American film director, producer and actor Ron Howard and Josh Radnor, best known for portraying the main character Ted Mosby on the Emmy Award-winning sitcom How I Met Your Mother.Creating a Happy Lifestyle – Actively living happy requires doing as well as learning. The magazine will feature information and ideas promoting giving back in the Gratitude column, articles on how to use leisure time, and what to do at work and home to create the right environment.Improving Wellbeing – Taking care of the physical self is an important aspect of wellbeing and happiness. Various articles ranging from meditation to exercise to nutrition provide readers with the tools and information they need to be healthier—and therefore happier.Cultivating Meaningful Relationships – Human happiness directly correlates to the satisfaction of interpersonal relationships. Whether forming healthy and happy bonds with your family or your co-workers, the magazine provides applicable tips and practices to help you achieve better, more rewarding relationships.The magazine will also include regular columns such as Friendly Table and Reading Corner, which give readers access to the happiest foods and books, along with a monthly survey sharing insight from readers around the world.“Live Happy is the first magazine tobe about happiness cover to cover enabling people to actively engage, discuss and apply the principles of wellbeing and happiness,” says Editor-in-Chief Karol Nickell, “at a time when people, companies and countries are wanting to know and understand how happiness can improve everyday lives.”The magazine will appear at more than 10,000 locations in the United States and Canada, including premium grocers Whole Foods, Kroger and Sprouts; premier placement at Hudson News and bookstores including Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Million, Indigo Books and Shoppers Drug.About Live HappyLive Happy LLC, owned by veteran entrepreneur Jeff Olson, is a company dedicated to promoting and sharing authentic happiness through education, integrity, gratitude, and community awareness. Headquartered in Dallas, Texas, its mission is to impact the world by bringing the happiness movement to a personal level and inspiring people to engage in living purpose-driven, healthy, meaningful lives. For more information, please visit livehappymagazine.com.

Self-Care

Press Releases

Live Happy's December Issue: Your Go-To Guide to Gifts, Giving Back and Gratitude This Holiday Season Dallas, TX – October 23, 2017 – The December issue of Live Happy, available on newsstands on October 24th, is dedicated to the healing power of gratitude and giving back during the holiday season. Readers can also gain inspiration with Live Happy’s gift guide that supports causes around the world, DIY crafts, and recipes. Actress Anna Faris Is Live Happy’s October Cover Story Dallas, TX – August 8, 2017 – Gracing the cover of Live Happy’s October 2017 issue, actress Anna Faris explains why being Unqualified to give others advice hasn’t stopped her so far. After decades of doling out unsolicited advice and testing personal boundaries among friends, family and strangers, the actress, producer, and now author morphed her tell-it-like-it-is podcast, Unqualified, into a memoir and advice book, also called Unqualified, debuting this October. Live Happy Radio Show Launches in Dallas Dallas, TX –July 2017 – This summer, as part of its mission to cultivate and spread happiness around the world, Dallas-based Live Happy launched its first radio show, Live Happy Radio. Airing locally in Dallas on Sunday mornings from 8 a.m. – 9 a.m. on 98.7 KLUV-FM, listeners can also tune in on Radio.com or on the Radio.com app (available on iTunes and Google Play) by searching “98.7 KLUV.” Comedian Jim Gaffigan Plays for Laughs in Live Happy’s July Issue Cover Story Dallas, TX – May 23, 2017 – Comedian Jim Gaffigan is the featured cover of the July 2017 issue of Live Happy, on newsstands May 23. Readers can gain inspiration from Gaffigan’s story and more in this new issue, which explores fulfilling adventures, travel and journeys in ways that inspire awe and heighten creativity. Actress, Rapper and Author Queen Latifah Proves Happiness Reigns Supreme in Live Happy’s May issue cover story Dallas, TX – March 7, 2017 – “Whatever your inspiration, you have to look for a reason to fight the good fight every day,” says Queen Latifah, whose fighting spirit and confidence helped her rise above tough times to win acclaim and a score of awards in music, film and TV, where she appears in her latest project, Lee Daniels’ FOX series, Star. Action Star Ming-Na Wen Pulls No Punches in Live Happy’s February issue cover story Dallas, TX – January 3, 2017 – “If you tell yourself enough times that you can achieve something, you can,” says Ming-Na Wen, who kicks up her physicality at age 53 in epic choreographed fight scenes as Agent Melinda May on ABC’s Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Actress Mayim Bialik Embraces Her Inner Geek in December Issue of Live Happy Magazine Dallas, TX – October 11, 2016 – Mayim Bialik plays a neurobiologist on TV in CBS’ highly rated The Big Bang Theory, now in its 10th season, but much of her braniac persona is not an act at all. In real life, Bialik has a Ph.D. in neuroscience. “There’s an unintended bit of art imitating life,” she says of her TV alter ego Amy Farrah Fowler, but with a slight difference. “I studied how brains work and she slices them apart!” Maya Rudolph Shares Her Love for Laughter in the September Issue of Live Happy Magazine Dallas, TX – July 12, 2016 – Comedian and actress Maya Rudolph gets groovy on the September cover of Live Happy magazine, on newsstands today. She talks about her new comedy and music show with Martin Short, Maya & Marty, her Prince cover band Princess and gets nostalgic about growing up in a house full of music and “amazing, warm, lovely people.” Jesse Tyler Ferguson is Fully Committed to Taking Risks for Happiness in the May/June Issue of Live Happy Magazine Dallas, TX – May 3, 2016 – On newsstands today, Live Happy cover star Jesse Tyler Ferguson shares in the May/June issue why he chooses to forgo comfort in favor of living a rich, vibrant life on the edge. Ferguson, who says he uses risk as a motivator, puts his mantra to the test this month by starring in the one-man Broadway show Fully Committed, lending his voice to Ice Age: Collision Course and continuing his role as a member the ABC hit comedy Modern Family. Live Happy Invites All to the March to Happiness Dallas, TX – March 1, 2016 – Today, Live Happy launches a month-long ‘March to Happiness’ celebration, kicking off with the release of the new issue of the magazine, which is dedicated to savoring life’s greatest moments, including those as a parent of joyful children. On March 15th, Live Happy will release its first book: Live Happy: Ten Practices for Choosing Joy (HarperElixir). Throughout the month, everyone is encouraged to share #HappyActs to honor and support the International Day of Happiness on March 20. Live Happy Magazine Features Jillian Michaels on Cover of January/February Issue Dallas, TX – January 5, 2016 – On newsstands today, Live Happy, the first-of-its-kind publication combining the science of happiness with practical advice to help its readers lead lives of meaning and joy, dedicates its January/February issue to achieving and celebrating our better selves in 2016. Live Happy Magazine Features Dolly Parton on Cover of November/December Issue Dallas, TX – November 3, 2015 – Live Happy’s November/December issue, on newsstands today, is dedicated to family and forgiveness. In the cover feature, country music superstar and entertainment icon Dolly Parton shares the power of family and her “Smoky Mountain” roots as the foundations for her strength, values and trademark positivity. Live Happy Magazine Features Anthony Anderson on Cover of September/October Issue Dallas, TX – September 1, 2015 – Live Happy’s September/October issue, on newsstands today, highlights the importance of prioritizing positivity and finding purpose and meaning in everyday activities. Emmy-nominated actor Anthony Anderson—featured on the cover—gives us a glimpse of where his inner strength, character and resilience come from and shares the latest on how he manages multiple work projects, family life and a rigorous fitness routine while keeping it all real—and fun. Live Happy Magazine Features Alanis Morissette on Cover of July/August Issue Dallas, TX – June 30, 2015 – Finding a “happy place” might not be at the top of everyone’s priority list this summer, but perhaps it should be. The July/August issue of Live Happy highlights the importance of living in the now while striving to expand our consciousness and happiness. Singer/songwriter Alanis Morissette graces the cover with modern-day flower child flair and shares her unique perspective on living in the moment. Live Happy Magazine Announces ABC News’ Good Morning America Co-Anchors on Cover of May/June Issue Dallas, TX – May 5, 2015 – It’s safe to say not many people would be happy waking up daily for work at 4 a.m., unless you’re the cast and crew of Good Morning America! In Live Happy’s May/June issue, the GMA co-anchors, George Stephanopoulos, Robin Roberts, Lara Spencer, Amy Robach and Ginger Zee share their own “secrets to success” in the workplace—revealing how camaraderie, teamwork and starting the day off right are essential to their positive work environment and to kicking off every morning with a smile. How Do You Share Happiness? Dallas, TX – March 3, 2015 – Live Happy celebrates the United Nations’ International Day of Happiness (March 20th) with its second annual issue dedicated to this day. As the magazine continues to share its quest of creating and living a happy life, the March/April issue offers features exploring well-being around the world and close to home. It also offers expert advice on habits, staying positive, celebrating at work and celebrating you. What’s Scott Foley’s Scandalous Truth? Pick Up Live Happy’s February Issue to Find Out Dallas, TX – January 6, 2015 – “Scandal’s” very own Scott Foley graces the February 2015 cover of Live Happy magazine, a first-of-its-kind publication that combines the science of happiness with real-world advice and practical tips to help readers live full and productive lives. In the first issue of the New Year, on newsstands today, Scott Foley explains where and when he developed his passion for acting and how his live-in-the-present philosophy plays an important role in his life. Kristin Chenoweth Credits Happiness for her Success in Live Happy’s Nov/Dec Issue Dallas, TX — Nov. 4, 2014—Kristin Chenoweth, Emmy and Tony award winner, graces the cover of the November/December issue of Live Happy magazine, a first-of-its-kind publication combining science with engaging and informative content to help readers achieve true happiness and live fuller and more productive lives. In this issue, on newsstands today, Kristin explains why she chooses happiness above security and success and shares her gratitude for life’s many blessings. Olivia Newton-John Graces First Anniversary Cover of Live Happy Dallas, TX — Sept. 2, 2014— Singer, actress and positive-emotion advocate, Olivia Newton-John graces the cover of the September/October issue of Live Happy magazine, a first-of-its-kind publication that combines the science of happiness with engaging and informative content to help readers live fuller and more productive lives. In this anniversary issue, on newsstands today, the songstress shares recent life decisions that have helped her carve out more time to indulge in her passions for nature, love and the goal of a blissful life balance. Miranda Lambert Talks Life, Community, and Staying True to Her Roots in New Issue of Live Happy Dallas, TX — July 1, 2014— Country superstar Miranda Lambert graces the cover of the July/August issue of Live Happy magazine, a first-of-its-kind publication that combines the science of happiness with personal stories and exclusive interviews. In the issue, on newsstands July 1, the songstress talks about staying true to her roots in Lindale, Texas, as well as championing the causes closest to her heart, including no-kill rescue shelters for dogs and raising awareness for abused women. New Issue of Live Happy Magazine Reveals How Compassion Can Improve One's Wellbeing Dallas, TX – May 6, 2014 – Considered one of the greatest virtues, compassion – the feeling of empathy for others – is the theme of Live Happy magazine’s May/June 2014 issue that hits stands today. Live Happy is the first-ever lifestyle magazine to balance the science of positive psychology with the art of application, and as the new issue reveals, recent studies and scientific research confirm that people who practice compassion receive an array of benefits that go beyond simply feeling good. Live Happy Magazine Welcomes Happiness Expert Gretchen Rubin as Featured Columnist Dallas, TX – April 30, 2014 – Live Happy magazine is pleased to announce that happiness expert and bestselling author Gretchen Rubin will become a columnist beginning with the May/June 2014 issue. Since its inception, Live Happy’s mission has been to inspire people to engage in living purpose-driven, healthy and meaningful lives. To achieve that goal, the magazine has strived to assemble a team of the most talented writers and editors in the business to not only provide readers with stellar content, but also to add value to the brand. Live Happy LLC names Kym Yancey CEO and Co-Founder DALLAS, TX – April 10, 2014 – Live Happy LLC announces Kym Yancey as CEO and Co-Founder effective immediately. Previously Co-Founder, Chief Marketing Officer, and President of eWomenNetwork, North America’s premier women’s business network, Yancey will oversee Live Happy’s strategy development and business initiatives, which include Live Happy magazine and campaigns such as Acts of Happiness. United Nations Celebrates International Day of Happiness With Live Happy Magazine March 20, 2014 – The United Nations designated March 20 as The International Day of Happiness in June of 2012 stemming from a resolution presented in a high-level meeting by the nation of Bhutan – the first country to measure Gross Domestic Happiness. Live Happy’s access to the leading academics, authors, psychologists and experts in the field, as well as its role as an underwriter of the Positive Education Summit offered the UN unprecedented access to leaders in the field. “It was our goal to bring real-world expertise to each discussion,” said Live Happy founder Jeff Olson – also a panelist. Live Happy Makes Global Commitment for Acts of Happiness in Honor of International Day of Happiness March 10, 2014 – Happiness can change the world, and there's an uplifting addition to the calendar to help spread and share the joy: The United Nations has officially recognized March 20th as The International Day of Happiness. To celebrate, Live Happy has created a call to action to inspire people to help make the world a happier place by intentionally engaging in small acts to share and spread happiness. With a goal of receiving 100,000 pledges to commit an act of happiness by March 21, 2014, Live Happy LLC also plans to recognize the happy acts around the US by hosting happiness walls both physically in cities across the US on March 20th and virtually worldwide at ActsofHappiness.org. Happiness Matters: Live Happy Encourages All to Celebrate Happiness for a Day, Choose it for a Lifetime March 4, 2014 – Live Happy magazine’s third issue hits stands today, just in time to commemorate the United Nations’ 2nd annual International Day of Happiness. The March/April 2014 issue continues its mission to make 2014 the “year of happiness,” featuring articles and original content for readers to incorporate into their daily lives. In conjunction, Live Happy is joining forces with its Acts of Happiness campaign intended to inspire people nationwide to pledge and share their #happyacts. Live Happy Magazine Kicks Off 2014, the "Year of Happiness," with Issue Dedicated to "Hope" Dec. 20, 2013 – Live Happy magazine, the recently-launched publication dedicated to promoting and sharing authentic happiness, debuts its February 2014 issue on newsstands December 31st, launching its "Year of Happiness" with an issue devoted to "Hope." Live Happy Magazine Launches to Help Readers Live a Happier Life October 22, 2013 – The facts show that now more than ever, the concept of achieving personal happiness is at an all-time high. People are looking to family, relationships, careers and personal achievement, desperately seeking happiness, but finding more questions than answers. The new Live Happy magazine and website, launching today, will be the first lifestyle magazine completely dedicated to sharing information and resources to assist in our timeless pursuit of happiness.

Happy children in front of a chalkboard.

Self-Care

Positive Education Summit

One of the best things about being the editor-in-chief of Live Happy is meeting amazing professionals who are dedicated to increasing the wellbeing of others. This was particularly true at an international meeting that I attended recently and report on here:Applying positive psychology principles to education gave birth to the term positive education and to the Positive Education Summit held in the UK earlier this month. Summit leaders Martin Seligman, Director of the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania, and James O’Shaughnessy, Managing Director, Floreat Education in the UK, gathered delegates from around the world to share their experience, research and insights on positive education. A special meeting with British government officials at No. 10 Downing St. kicked off the summit and then continued at Wellington College, which hosted the three-day event.Support for positive education dominated presentations made by the delegates. University of Pennsylvania professor Angela Duckworth shared research that links character strength and student grade-point average, energy and class participation. David Levin, KIPP co-founder and superintendent, KIPP New York, talked about how teachers at his school lace lessons with questions aimed at building character and self-esteem. Stephen Meek, principal of Geelong Grammar School in Victoria, Australia, shared his school’s fully integrated model in which staff and faculty receive well-being training, and classes have well-being teachings interwoven into them. Ian Morris, Wellington College instructor and author of Learning to Ride Elephants, explained his program: Students are taught the basics of physical health, positive relationships, perspective, engagement and living sustainably as well as finding meaning and purpose. Kaiping Peng, professor at Tsinghua University, China, shared that 150 schools in China now teach positive education and the Chinese Positive Psychology Association made positive education it’s No. 1 priority.There was enthusiastic debate during the meeting with various viewpoints on the use of common words versus academic terms to define and describe positive education. The need to articulate positive education to multiple, diverse stakeholders and the context of local, national and cultural differences were projected into commentary and questions. While there was agreement about the premise of positive education, there was less unity on those topics. Delegates underscored the need for continued discussion on these and other important issues.Results from the summit:Awareness of positive education was raised in the UK: The meeting with government officials resulted in the request for a white paper on the subject.A new network of positive education experts was created: The delegates committed to planning a global positive education event.Examples of positive education at work were shared: Look for some of those stories here in the near future.

On a chalkboard, sad face plus dollar sign equals happy face

work

Does Money Really Make People Happier?

"Money, money, money, Always sunny, In the rich man's world."Abba gets me, that's what you're thinking. We all have hopes of someday finding a money tree of sorts—a limitless source of income and cushioned financial security with Benjamins to spare. It's a common assumption that money will solve all your problems, that it'll buy you happiness. That assumption is only party true."We equate money with security and freedom, which inevitably leaves us feeling insecure and constricted," says David Geller, author ofWealth and Happiness.In his book, Gellershares a core message that money is not security or freedom. It's not going to turn an unhappy life into a happy one. But money is a tool, and you can use that tool to find happiness and better your life."The purpose of having wealth is to use it to create the life you desire, enhance the lives of the people you care about and leave a legacy that represents your passions and values," he says.That'shappy.Charles Richards, author ofThe Psychology of Wealth, agrees. "It's no coincidence that money is also called currency, taken from the wordcurrent—the flow of electric charge through a conductor," he writes. "Learning to manage money responsibly and serve others is like being able to use electric current in a productive manner. We can become powerful transformers for the currency of society. How we use that power is a great responsibility."Get this: After a modest level of income, there isn't really evidence to suggest that people's happiness increases with their wealth. Instead, whether you're loving life or hating it really depends on how you're using your money.But does that really matter? Yes, yes it does. There are steps to happiness, and the first one is to achieve a stable lifestyle—not to indulge in your next dose of pleasure. After the anxiety to provide life's basics, like food and a roof over your family's head, is diminished,thenyou can look to the pleasurable perks of financial success, like reservations to that fancy French restaurant around the corner or a drive in that shiny red sports car you've had your eye on for, like, forever. But that's not what the ultimate goal should be; luxury items won't make you happier—not in the long run."The purchase of those luxury goods or experiences does provide a short-term burst of pleasure, but it quickly fades,"Geller says. "Giving up happiness to purchase pleasure is a bad deal. It is almost always a good trade to give up some pleasure to buy additional happiness. We can use some of our freed up resources to help people we care about the most, and as we do that, we are likely to get a big boost of happiness."Geller says people should use their financial success to build better relationships, for more engaged experiences or to make a difference in the lives of the people who matter most. Wealth is about the resources we have to build a life we really, truly want."When we define wealth in purely financial terms, we underestimate the power of our other elements of wealth, and we often end up overlooking compelling solutions to our most powerful opportunities or challenges," he says. "The truth is, in many cases, our nonfinancial elements of wealth are considerably more powerful than our money."Happy might be hiding around the corner, so now you just have to go find it. But how?Geller suggests first reflecting on what you enjoy most about your life, what stresses you out the most and what parts of your life could use some positive transformation. Number two: Share your goals with friends and family—and stick with those who are supportive of your dreams and your plans to change certain aspects of your life. And then it's time for some action—make one incremental change, a change that will push your life toward a better, and happier, future."Success does not require a great deal of money," says Richards. "What it requires is a belief in one's inherent worth and a willingness to make a conscious investment in oneself.... A new state of mind must be put into practice in order to move forward in life and achieve something greater." Success—and happiness—comes from making the right choices and acting on your passions.Like Geller says, "Happiness takes work, and happiness takes time." So take a deep breath, and chase happy.

Self-Care

Satisfaction with Life Scale

To understand life satisfaction scores, it is helpful to understand some of the components that go into most people’s experience of satisfaction. One of the most important influences on happiness is social relationships. People who score high on life satisfaction tend to have close and supportive family and friends, whereas those who do not have close friends and family are more likely to be dissatisfied. Of course the loss of a close friends of family member can cause dissatisfaction with life, and it may take quite a time for the person to bounce back from the loss.Another factor that influences the life satisfaction of most people is work or school, or performance is an important role such as homemaker or grandparent. When the person enjoys his or her work, whether it is paid or unpaid work, and feels that it is meaningful and important, this contributes to life satisfaction. When work is going poorly because of bad circumstances or a poor fit with the person’s strengths, this can lower life satisfaction. When a person has important goals, and is failing to make adequate progress toward them, this too can lead to life dissatisfaction.A third factor that influences the life satisfaction of most people is personal—satisfaction with the self, religious or spiritual life, learning and growth, and leisure. For many people these are sources of satisfaction. However, when these sources of personal worth are frustrated, they can be powerful sources of dissatisfaction. Of course there are additional sources of satisfaction and dissatisfaction—some that are common to most people such as health, and others that are unique to each individual. Most people know the factors that lead to their satisfaction or dissatisfaction, although a person’s temperament—a general tendency to be happy or unhappy—can color their responses.There is no one key to life satisfaction, but rather a recipe that includes a number of ingredients. With time and persistent work, people’s life satisfaction usually goes up when they are dissatisfied. People who have had a loss recover over time. People who have a dissatisfying relationship or work often make changes over time that will increase their dissatisfaction. One key ingredient to happiness, as mentioned above, is social relationships, and another key ingredient is to have important goals that derive from one’s values, and to make progress toward those goals. For many people it is important to feel a connection to something larger than oneself. When a person tends to be chronically dissatisfied, they should look within themselves and ask whether they need to develop more positive attitudes to life and the world. In most ways, my life is close to ideal. Strongly Agree Agree Slightly Agree Neither Agree or Disagree Slightly Disagree Disagree Strongly Disagree The conditions of my life are excellent. Strongly Agree Agree Slightly Agree Neither Agree or Disagree Slightly Disagree Disagree Strongly Disagree I am satisfied with my life. Strongly Agree Agree Slightly Agree Neither Agree or Disagree Slightly Disagree Disagree Strongly Disagree So far I have gotten the important things I want in life. Strongly Agree Agree Slightly Agree Neither Agree or Disagree Slightly Disagree Disagree Strongly Disagree If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing. Strongly Agree Agree Slightly Agree Neither Agree or Disagree Slightly Disagree Disagree Strongly Disagree Your Score 30 – 35: Very high score, highly satisfied Respondents who score in this range love their lives and feel that things are going very well. Their lives are not perfect, but they feel that things are about as good as lives get. Furthermore, just because the person is satisfied does not mean she or he is complacent. In fact, growth and challenge might be part of the reason the respondent is satisfied. For most people in this high-scoring range, life is enjoyable, and the major domains of life are going well—work or school, family, friends, leisure and personal development.25 – 29: High scoreIndividuals who score in this range like their lives and feel that things are going well. Of course their lives are not perfect, but they fell that things are mostly good. Furthermore, just because the person is satisfied does not mean she or he is complacent. In fact, growth and challenge might be part of the reason the respondent is satisfied. For most people in this high-scoring range, life is enjoyable, and the major domains of life are going well—work or school, family, friends, leisure and personal development. The person may draw motivation from the areas of dissatisfaction.20 – 24: Average scoreThe average of life satisfaction in economically developed nations is in this range—the majority of people are generally satisfied, but have some areas where they very much would like some improvement. Some individuals score in this range because they are mostly satisfied with most areas of their lives but they see the need for some improvement in each area. Other respondents score in this range because they are satisfied with most domains of their lives, but have one or two areas where they would like to see large improvements. A person scoring in this range is normal in that they have areas of their lives that need improvement. However, an individual in this range would usually like to move to a higher level by making some life changes.15 – 19: Slightly below average in life satisfactionPeople who score in this range usually have small but significant problems in several areas of their lives, or have many areas that are doing fine but one area that represents a substantial problem for them. If a person has moved temporarily into this level of life satisfaction from a higher level because of some recent event, things will usually improve over time and satisfaction will generally move back up. On the other hand, if a person is chronically slightly dissatisfied with many areas of life, some changes might be in order. Sometimes the person is simply expecting too much, and sometimes life changes are needed. Thus, although temporary dissatisfaction is common and normal, a chronic level of dissatisfaction across a number of areas of life calls for reflection. Some people can gain motivation from a small level dissatisfaction, but often dissatisfaction across a number of life domains is a distraction, and unpleasant as well.10 – 14: DissatisfiedPeople who score in this range are substantially dissatisfied with their lives. People in this range may have a number of domains that are not going well, or one or two domains that are doing very badly. If life dissatisfaction is a response to a recent event such as bereavement, divorce, or a significant problem at work, the person will probably return over time to his or her former level of higher satisfaction. However, if low levels of life satisfaction have been chronic for the person, some changes are in order—both in attitudes and patterns of thinking, and probably in life activities as well. Low levels of life satisfaction in this range, if they persist, can indicate that things are going badly and life alterations are needed. Furthermore, a person with low life satisfaction in this range is sometimes not functioning well because their unhappiness serves as a distraction. Talking to a friend, member of the clergy, counselor, or other specialist can often help the person get moving in the right direction, although positive change will be up to the person.5 – 9: Extremely DissatisfiedIndividuals who score in this range are usually extremely unhappy with their current life. In some cases this is in reaction to some recent bad event such as widowhood or unemployment. In other cases, it is a response to a chronic problem such as alcoholism or addiction. In yet other cases the extreme dissatisfaction is a reaction due to something bad in life such as recently having lost a loved one. However, dissatisfaction at this level is often due to dissatisfaction in multiple areas of life. Whatever the reason for the low level of life satisfaction, it may be that the help of others are needed—a friend or family member, counseling with a member of the clergy, or help from a psychologist or other counselor. If the dissatisfaction is chronic, the person needs to change, and often others can help.

Education

Positive Education: The School of Wellbeing

Imagine sending your kids off to school and them learning reading, writing, arithmetic and flourishing. That’s the concept of positive education, a trend that’s popular in Australia and England, and gaining traction in the United States. Positive education is about merging flourishing—positive emotion, engagement, positive relationships, meaning and accomplishment—with traditional education. While many schools focus primarily on academic performance, positive education is about developing your child’s sense of well-being and social responsibility. While the idea of helping students build on their strengths and nurturing their resilience and well-being has been at the heart of Montessori and Steiner approaches for some time, Dr. Martin Seligman is leading the effort to bring positive psychology into more schools. Martin believes the need for positive education is growing with the worldwide prevalence of depression among young people. So he works with staff, parents and students to teach his PERMA model—the five elements of well-being—with the ultimate goal of helping students flourish. (P) Positive Emotions—Feeling positive emotions such as joy, gratitude, interest, hope (E) Engagement—Being fully absorbed in activities that use your skills yet challenge you (R) Relationships—Having positive relationships (M) Meaning—Belonging to and serving something you believe is bigger than yourself (A) Accomplishment—Pursuing success, winning achievement and mastery Some examples of positive education in schools include positive behavior initiatives (teaching empathy and compassion), curriculum designed to increase confidence, and strength projects for children. Michelle McQuaid, a teacher of positive education in Australian schools (and Live Happy blogger), believes “success is achieved when a school leadership team collectively supports the idea of making the well-being of students as important as their academic achievements and inviting, connecting and empowering the whole school community around this idea,” including administrators, teachers, parents and students. “My vision is for children to receive an education that teaches them how to flourish intellectually, emotionally, socially and physically. For this to happen, they need to be a part of an education system that is flourishing—where leadership teams feel challenged and supported, where teachers feel engaged and appreciated, and parents feel confident and empowered,” McQuaid says. What Parents Can Do Praise children for effort rather than intelligence. When you tell a child “You are so smart,” they don’t understand what they have done and how to repeat it, so they fear making mistakes or view failures as being dumb. When you praise effort, children understand they can influence the result, and learn to view failures as learning opportunities. Provide a consistent family routine. Take an interest in what your children are learning. Encourage special interests. Turn off the TV and encourage children to have free playtime where they use their imagination and creativity. Give kids achievable jobs at home to develop a sense of responsibility and self-mastery. Celebrate who your children are, not just what they achieve. Help your children discover their strengths, including character strengths like kindness. Show your children how to master challenges and overcome frustrations with an optimistic and not pessimistic approach. Teach and show your kids how to go on the hunt for gratitude. Share things that are going well. Keep lobbying your children and educators to create a learning environment that allows your child to flourish. What Schools Can Do Assess what you are doing well already. Adopt the PERMA model. Embed positive education into your school strategy so it becomes your school culture. Evaluate your results to assess your effectiveness. Connect with other educators and schools to share your positive education journey and benefit from their knowledge, resources and experiences Sandra Bienkowski, owner of The Media Concierge, LLC, is a national writer of wellness and personal development content and a social media expert.

Smiling Buddha in Grass with Yellow Flowers

Self-Care

The Happiness Trap and How to Avoid It

I’ve been thinking a lot recently about happiness. It’s a subject not many people devote themselves to. Until the advent of “positive psychology” in the last decade, the psyche was largely studied through the window of unhappiness. Psychologists had their hands full treating anxiety, depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder and a host of other maladies the mind is heir to. It was assumed that happiness didn’t need much thought, on the whole. When pollsters asked the simple question “Are you happy?” more than 80 percent of Americans answered “yes.”But there’s a hidden trap behind this cheerful response. The expansion of happiness is the goal of life. However you define success, if it didn’t bring a measure of happiness, success wouldn’t be worth attaining. So what kind of success would make a person truly, deeply and permanently happy? Society pressures us to believe that external achievement is the key. If you attain enough money, status, power and all the other trappings of a burgeoning career, you will experience happiness. To this list, most people would also add the need for fulfilling relationships and a secure family life.The trap is that external success doesn’t lead to happiness. The evidence is well-documented by now. Studies of wealth reveal that, beyond a certain modest prosperity, having more money not only doesn’t buy greater happiness; rather, it tends to make people unhappy. On the broad scale, the traffic in pharmaceuticals for depression and anxiety is a multibillion-dollar business. Divorce rates hover around 50 percent, meaning that anyone’s chances of attaining a happy marriage are no more than random.Standing back from this confusing picture, I began to think of one person who had the courage to test, through his own experience, almost every avenue that might lead to happiness. He came to a definite conclusion, and he did it 2,500 years ago. Born a prince, he was carefully protected from any form of external suffering, yet by the time he grew up, simply the sight of other people’s suffering convinced him that money and privilege were fragile and unreliable. Every person, he reasoned, must confront disease, aging and death. Those threats were enough to undercut the comforts of the most coddled lifestyle.Therefore, he turned to a simpler existence. He left his family and wandered the countryside, begging for alms and depending on the kindness of strangers. He had no worldly obligations and enjoyed the simplicity he had found, yet his mind refused to be tamed. It ran riot with subtle fears and anxieties.So he decided to tame his mind by taming his body, because the body carries out the mind’s rampant desires. Through rigorous discipline, he underwent one kind of purification after another until his body wasted away and he was on the brink of death. Yet his mind refused to be tamed. He crawled back to a normal existence, and as he recuperated, he wondered what path was left to him.By now, you may realize that we are talking about Siddhartha Gautama, the ancient Indian prince who became the Buddha. As a physician myself, I think of him as a kind of soul doctor, someone who was willing to test to the fullest what it means to be alive and conscious. Siddhartha spent year after year in dissatisfaction, searching for one thing: a happiness that cannot be taken away. And year after year that kind of happiness eluded him.Until he attained enlightenment. The awakening of the Buddha is said to have taken place sitting under a tree on a moonlit night. But how can total transformation take place instantly after years of searching? Having found the goal of life—supreme happiness that can never be taken away—the Buddha must be called an ultimate success. I’d like to suggest that what turned Siddhartha into the Buddha is actually quite simple: He discovered his true self.I am not a Buddhist; rather, his story is symbolic of everyone. Happiness is a universal goal, and if the Buddha’s soul experiment was valid, the true self that he found is always available. By “true self,” I mean a level of awareness that is happy without reasons to be happy. It enjoys a permanent state of fulfillment, needing no externals. When you don’t need money, status, power or even other people to love you, those things don’t vanish. They remain valuable as mirrors of your inner fulfillment. Or, to put it simply, the externals that people chase after are the byproducts of happiness, not the cause.That’s where my recent thoughts led me, to the notion that enlightenment is actually the simplest and most basic way to be happy. Siddhartha found that pursuing his true self, as directly as possible, was the route to happiness.As I see it, enlightenment is not only a normal state; it’s the most normal state of existence. It’s also the highest definition of success.Deepak Chopra is a leader in the field of mind-body medicine and the author of numerous books, including the best-sellingAgeless Body, Timeless Mind: The Quantum Alternative to Growing Old.He serves as the director of education for the Chopra Center for Well-Being in California.

Resources

What is Positive Psychology?

Positive Psychology is an emerging field of study that focuses on the science of happiness. Pioneered by Dr. Martin E.P. Seligman in 1998, the purpose of Positive Psychology is to find out the virtues that lead to a meaningful life and the effects on that will have on an individual, as well as the community as a whole.Instead of just treating mental illness and relieving suffering, positive psychologists also focus on the strengths that make life worth living and restoring a healthy balance to well-being.Martin andMihaly Csikszentmihalyi, a psychology professor from Claremont Graduate University, describe the new science in the following way: "We believe that a psychology of positive human functioning will arise that achieves a scientific understanding and effective interventions to build thriving in individuals, families, and communities."Studies have shown that happiness can have a dramatic effect on an individual’s well-being, contributing to every aspect of their life, including health, relationships, employment and longevity. According to the United Nations World Happiness Report 2013, positive emotions help the cardiovascular, immune and endocrine systems; lower the risk of heart disease and strokes; and even speed up the recovery process. Happy workers are more likely to receive positive ratings from management, as well as see an increase in wages. Employee satisfaction can have a positive effect on productivity and performance, increasing revenue, sales and ultimately profit.Positive psychologists believe that figuring out the puzzle and pursuit of happiness can lead to answers to some of our biggest problems individually, nationally and even globally.

relationships

What My Dog Taught Me About Joy

For most of my life, I have been a cat person. I have lived with little house-tigers that sharpened their claws on my couches, played midnight hockey with my hair ornaments and dragged my dirty laundry from the hamper to my pillow. I have even endured the terrifying stare of a cat that sees she's getting a second night of "Seafood Surprise" canned food for dinner. But then I married a man who was allergic to cats, and when my last beloved kitty, a dowager named Lady Macho, passed on, my husband suggested we get a dog. A dog! What a concept. I figured we'd think about it for a year or three. And then a friend told us about Jordie, a golden retriever puppy who needed a home. He'd been bred to be a show dog, she said, but when he was 6 months old, a routine X-ray revealed that he had a bit of hip dysplasia—and just like that, his show career was over and he needed a family. We had him for 13 years, five months, three weeks and then part of one day. And in that time, he showed me a lot about life. Whereas my feline companions had taught me about aloofness and how to be cool (qualities I admired but never could master), Jordie taught me The Six Major Laws of Dog Happiness, which work equally well for humans. 1. Live in the moment.Whether he was basking in the sun, letting his ears blow in the breeze or rolling in a mud puddle, Jordie was always giving himself a good time. Go for a car ride? A hike in the woods? Take a nap in the shade? Everything was the best idea ever and so exciting it was as though it had never happened before. He never felt guilty about it, never thought, Hmmm, I really should be doing my taxes. He just took the joy and thanked whatever the god of dogs brought his way. After watching him awhile, I finally realized that if I didn't try to interpret, explain and manage everything, if I stopped apologizing for not being productive every minute of life, I could sometimes almost approach that kinds of happiness myself, the happiness of just being. 2. Going a bit insane is wonderful.I used to pride myself on staying rational, stable and calm. Dogs don't buy any of that. At least once a day Jordie took off on what we called a "puppy blowout," when he would suddenly sit up at full alert, as if hearing a distant call from his wolf relatives or his home planet, and then erupt in a full-tilt charge through the house, running in circles through the dining room, kitchen and living room, dashing down the hall and through the bedrooms, leaping up on the beds and down again, then careening up and down the stairs. His ears flew behind him; his eyes were wild—a portrait of pure joy and sheer insanity. Did he care that he looked ridiculous, that we were definitely laughing at him and not with him? Did he fear losing control? Not once. I've learned to do some puppy blowouts myself, singing at the top of my lungs, dancing like I'm at a disco at closing time or simply getting up from my desk to run and scream for a bit. It's wonderful. 3. Just showing up is enough.This is probably one of the great laws of dog happiness and one of the reasons we love them. Dogs don't solve our problems and never offer one piece of advice. All they do is sit with us when we're emotional basket cases, and that's enough. One day when Jordie and I were out walking, we stopped to talk to a woman we didn't know. Usually Jordie, who was shy, stayed close to me, but this time, he went over and stood next to the woman, nudging her hand and then licking it. I apologized for his forwardness. "Oh, that's OK," she said, matter-of-factly. "I was just diagnosed with cancer last week, and dogs know how to be with people who are sick." Sure enough, I started to notice that whenever one of us wasn't feeling well, Jordie was right there next to our beds, just being present—a St. Bernard without the brandy. 4. Feel guilty... and move on.Dogs are masters of the quick guilt trip. They are so very sorry they ate all the appetizers, unrolled the toilet paper and soiled the floor. They are the picture of contrition—lowering their heads and tails, shuffling around, even whimpering about how horrified they are at their scandalous behavior. And then—presto! It's over! They're happy again, back to feeling completely unashamed and quite certain that you've forgiven them, too. It's not that dogs don't know trouble; it's just that they know something we forgot: Staying in trouble mode is boring, destructive and doesn't do anybody any good. Go for a puppy blowout or take a nap. Even just wagging your tail can make you feel better. 5. You can't always be perfect.I have an ex-husband who, every year at Christmas, wanted our children to mail him a white clam pizza from a certain famous pizza restaurant in our city. The children didn't drive, and the pizza place was too snobby to accept phone orders, so this meant that I had to spend an evening standing in a two-hour line (often in the rain or snow), order the pizza, wait for it to be made, then bring it home, pack it into plastic bags and then into a box, and overnight-mail it to him thousands of miles away—yearafter year. Once, after we'd bought the required pizza, before we could pack it up,Jordiecame running into my bedroom with that "Timmy's-in-the-well" look that all watchers of Lassie remember. We followed him to the living room, where it turned out there were slices of pizza strewn everywhere. Some had dog-sized teeth marks in them. Others were simply missing altogether.Jordiedashed around in circles, seemingly distraught at what he had done, before he forgave himself and went to lie down and digest his pizza dinner. It didn't take me long to figure out what to do. I threw away the obviously "used" slices and dusted off the onces that were resting on the couch and on the rug. And then, yes, I packed them up in plastic bags and sent them off the next morning in the mail. Oddly enough, I didn't even feel bad about it. Or if I did, likeJordie, I got over it quickly. And the bonus: I was never asked for another clam pizza. 6. Learn to let go.Make no mistake: Dogs love their possessions just the way humans do. Jordie often had a special stuffed animal friend, a treasure he guarded and protected like his own dear child. When he was in the throes of these relationships, he wouldn't even go for walks without his "lovey" coming along. And then, months later, for no reason I could discern, the relationships would simply be over. He would awaken one day, take a look at his beloved and heave a sigh that spoke volumes: Regret was in there, and sadness, but also a kind of acceptance of a difficult fact. It was time to say goodbye. Perhaps this was a mutual parting of the ways that they both acknowledge at some dog-to-polyester level. He would carry the stuffed animal outside and place it behind our shed, never to be visited again. And that was it. When he came back into the house, he was done, free from his responsibilities. It clearly hadn't been easy, but it was over. If it's not easy to say goodbye to a stuffed animal, it must be even heard to say goodbye to life. But that day came, too. At the end, he had a series of strokes that at first made it difficult for him to walk straight and then made it impossible for him to walk at all. We couldn't bear to give him up, yet we knew we had to. But how do you decide when? We spoke of almost nothing else for weeks. The vet said that when Jordie was no longer taking pleasure in life, that might be the time to have him put down. Finally I made the appointment, the last one of the evening. Jordie and I spent the afternoon together, and I sat with him while he dozed on the floor. I offered him all the forbidden treats he loved: chocolate candies and bites of ice cream. He obligingly took a few nibbles, but I sensed he was only doing this for me. The truth was that he was ready. He put his head next to my hand, the way he'd done with the lady who had cancer. Then he sighed, the way he had when he was about to say goodbye to a stuffed animal. I knew it was me he was comforting, not himself. He was ready to slip away, to ride that moment right out there—without fear, without panic, without regret. I recognized the same wordless happiness he'd always known. He licked my hand, took one more deep breath, and then he was quiet. We sattogether until it was time to go. Sandi Kahn Shelton is the author of three humor books about parenting and four novels, including The Stuff That Never Happened, which she wrote under the pen name of Maddie Dawson. She's at work on a fifth novel and is thinking about getting another dog. She lives in Connecticut.

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What My Dog Taught Me About Joy

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