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Halfway to a Better Me

As we continue with Live Happy’s 90 Days to a Happier You challenge, join editor Chris Libby for part two of his blog series as he attempts to maintain the goals he set with the help of coach Caroline Miller. So, we are 45 days into my 90-day program of goal-setting and I am already starting to see positive changes. I like running, so one my first goals was to start my workouts in the morning instead of after work. The result has been more energy when I get to work and more time at night to spend with my family—both positive things. I haven’t created more hours in the day; I just rearranged my activities to get as much efficiency out of it as I can. Another useful assignment from my coach, Caroline Miller, was to write an essay about my best possible self 10 years from now, including all the things I’d like to accomplish if there were no limits. By 2026, I wrote, I would have successfully completed two marathons, continued to flourish in my career and saved money to travel abroad with my family. My daughter is growing up to be thoughtful and caring about those around her. And I have completed a Zen garden that surrounds a hammock swinging in my backyard. Unfinished business Back in the real world, I do have a hammock in my backyard and I’ve often thought about creating a landscaped area around it—something Zen-like and calming. That was supposed to be my summer project of 2015. Here we are in 2016 and it's still not complete. Every time I walk into the yard, I see the hammock above the patch of barren land. This constant reminder of unfinished business can do one of two things: motivate me to finish my landscaping goal or fill me with negative thoughts and regret. I am currently experiencing the latter, because the hammock has been a lower priority than some of my more immediate goals. Limited bandwidth I have what Caroline calls “too many willpower goals.” It turns out we only have enough bandwidth to effectively accomplish one or maybe two goals at a time and do it well. Once we start to pile too many things on our plate, we can get distracted and discouraged. Regrets start to seep in and we don’t have the ability to fight off the temptation and just give up. Put your goals in order of priority Because I’ve set so many goals for myself during this project, including waking up earlier, getting more organized at work, running more, saving for travel and landscaping … one or more will inevitably get less attention. I know that I am not a landscaper and that is probably why this particular goal is at the bottom of my list, but I still feel badly about not completing it. Caroline says it’s OK to set priorities and be realistic about the goals we won’t complete. As it so happens, winter is not a great time to relax on a hammock anyway. I’ve even taken it down, so I am no longer reminded of an incomplete garden and I can focus my time and energy on more immediate goals. I will have a Zen garden, just not today or even tomorrow. In my essay, the exercise was to picture my goals in the next 10 years; not everything has to be completed in the first three months. Read Chris's coach Caroline Miller's 2nd blog about maintaining your goals, here. Catch up by reading Chris's first blog, here. Chris Libby is Live Happy's section editor.

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Birth of a Book

As those of us here on the Live Happy staff know very well, there are loads of books about happiness on the shelves. So what makes Live Happy: Ten Practices for Choosing Joy, special? We sat with our own editorial director, Deborah K. Heisz, to find out what sets this new book apart and what makes it a compelling read. LIVE HAPPY: Deborah, what made you decide we needed to create this book? DEBORAH K. HEISZ: As you said, bookshelves are full of books about happiness, and since I read them all—or try to, anyway—I noticed they fell into three distinct camps. One kind of happiness book is written by positive psychologists and is often targeted to the scientific community. Another kind of book is someone’s personal reflections on happiness, and the third type is written for businesspeople. We realized there was a huge gap that needed to be filled. There was no book that distilled the science on happiness—the results coming from the research of positive psychologists—for the average consumer and provide examples of people putting them into action. Doing that is the mission of this magazine and it was also the driving mission behind the book. LH: What do you think is the most common misperception people have about happiness? DH: Most people have the basic recipe for happiness exactly backward. They think that if only they had the right relationship, the right job, the right amount of money in the bank, then they would be happy. Yet happier people are more likely to attain success of all kinds. Happy people are the ones who have good relationships. Happy people get better jobs and make more money than unhappy people do. So you don't have to wait to be happy. My hope is that this book provides you with the tools to create happiness now. LH: The book’s subtitle says there are 10 practices for choosing joy. What are those practices? And why do you say that joy is something we can choose, since life can throw us all curveballs? DH: Happiness is a choice and something we can work on and increase all our lives. The wonderful thing is that so many aspects of our lives can bring us happiness. We just have to take the steps. We have to commit to the journey. The 10 practices that science shows us can lead to a happier life are these: a positive attitude, deep connections with other people, a sense our lives have meaning, creativity, gratitude, mindfulness, health, resilience, spirituality and giving back. Realizing that there are 10 things that contribute to joy means we all have an opportunity to become happier. Maybe you already take good care of your health and have a wonderfully positive attitude, but you realize you could develop your spirituality and resilience more. Or maybe you get stuck thinking about the past too much and you realize that becoming more mindful could hugely increase your well-being. And today there are so many people who have all the trappings of success, but they feel hollow inside—and they need to find a life of meaning that’s congruent with who they are. Identifying the practices we can work on is how we choose joy. LH: You also included 40 stories about people who used these practices to increase happiness. Why? DH: It’s one thing to learn the scientific facts about happiness, and another thing altogether to see how those facts play out in real people’s lives. Yes, we can conduct scientific research on happiness, but the insights take on much more power and are more memorable when we see how they truly impact people. LH: Were there particular stories that stood out for you? DH: There are so many stories in the book I will never forget. Some of them taught me practices that have made my life better…exercises in positive thinking and gratitude, for example. Some of them totally made my day, like the story of the Flennikens, who adopted a daughter and, 10 years later, a baby boy. Then just a few months later, they learned their son Zach’s two older brothers, ages 2 and 3, needed a home. Not only did the Flennikens take in both boys, months later they opened their hearts and home to his older sister. Within a year, their family went from three to seven! And, the dad told us, “We feel blessed beyond belief.” Then there were the stories that made me cry, stories of people who have been through the most awful tragedies I could ever imagine who somehow found their way back to happiness. I’m thinking in particular about Celeste Peterson, whose only child, Erin, was killed in the Virginia Tech massacre in 2007. Her daughter was her greatest joy, her greatest accomplishment as an at-home mom. Yet she found a way to make something good out of what happened by creating a nonprofit and using her motherly love to make a real difference in the lives of at-risk boys, including one her daughter had befriended. Those stories awe me. They show me how strong the human spirit is. They have changed me in a profound way. LH: Some of the stories are from celebrities. Why did you decide to include their stories in the book? DH: Just 10 of the 40 stories are from celebrities; the others are from regular people. The really interesting thing is, the celebrity stories aren’t any different from the others. We all have our struggles in life. We all need the same things to be happy—love, a sense our lives have meaning, the resilience to bounce back from setbacks. The journey to happiness seems to be a great equalizer. LH: What was the most important thing you learned from the book? DH: Anyone, regardless of what has happened to him or her, can find deep and lasting happiness. The science tells our brains that it’s true. But the stories go straight to our hearts. They are what really convince us that happiness is possible, no matter what. Order your copy of Live Happy: Ten Practices for Choosing Joy now to get a special package of happiness gifts.

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Sweet Dreams Return!

As we continue with Live Happy’s special series 90 Days to a Happier You, join editor at large Shelley Levitt for part two of her blog series in which she triumphantly gets some sleep. A few weeks ago I was so exhausted from being restricted to a mere five hours of sleep a night that when I went to a 9 p.m. showing of The Martian I told my date to nudge me if I started nodding off. He did, and more than once. I’m pretty sure Matt Damon didn’t end up perishing on Mars, but I couldn’t say for sure. Now, a month later, I can report that the torturous “sleep prescription” my sleep coach Michael Breus had me follow—I couldn’t climb into bed before 1 a.m. and I had to get out by 5:30 or 6 a.m.—has proved remarkably curative. After years of chronic insomnia, I’m consistently enjoying a good night’s sleep. The path to good sleep is paved with interventions Under Michael’s coaching, I’ve changed a lot of behaviors beyond my sleep schedule. I no longer take naps. I don’t have caffeinated drinks after 2 p.m. While I’m still waking up a couple of times during the night, I’m not checking the time on my phone. And, in what I think has made a huge difference, I don’t pick up a book or start watching TV on my iPad—not even when I wake up feeling so fully alert and anxious that I won’t be able to fall back asleep. I’ve been shocked, and happily so, to discover that I actually will drift into the Land of Nod, as long as I keep the room dark. Questioning my beliefs Pretty much everything I thought I knew about my capacity for sleep has been turned upside down. Before we started the intervention Michael asked me to fill out a questionnaire that examined my beliefs about sleep. I had “strongly agreed” with statements like: “I need 8 hours of sleep to feel refreshed and function well during the day.” “I am concerned that chronic insomnia may have serious consequences for my physical health.” “I can’t ever predict whether I’ll have a good or poor night’s sleep.” “I feel insomnia is ruining my ability to enjoy life and prevents me from doing what I want.” A couple of days ago I filled out the questionnaire again and this time I checked off “strongly disagree” with each of these questions. Sleep restriction: painful but effective The evolution took place over weeks, with Michael gradually moving my bedtime back. Now, I’m on a midnight-to-6 a.m. schedule. It doesn’t feel like quite enough sleep; I think my sweet spot for slumber will turn out to be around seven hours. I’m no longer hitting a wall in the late afternoon, but I do find my energy sputtering at about 9 p.m., and it’s still an effort to stay awake until my prescribed bedtime. (Sometimes I don’t make it and I fall asleep on the couch, Kindle in hand.) I’ve asked (OK, begged) to get an extra half hour of sleep in the morning, but for now Michael isn’t budging. “The wake-up time is the anchor for the program,” he says. “You can vary your bedtime with social commitments, but if you start changing the time you get out of bed you’ll undo all my hard work…and yours!” And he showed no mercy when I told him how much I missed reading in bed. “I would prefer you NOT read in bed,” he responded when I emailed for a reprieve on the books-in-bed ban. “When you are lying down your heart rate and blood pressure will lower merely by your position and I like using that to help you fall asleep. If your brain gets used to that position while you are remaining alert to read, it will not be helpful. I suggest you find a favorite reading spot in your home.” Welcome, sweet dreams While I look forward to moving toward an 11:30 p.m. to 6:30 a.m. schedule, I agree with Michael’s assessment of my progress. “The number of awakenings and the length of awakenings are reducing,” he wrote. “You should realize that you are actually getting more sleep now. This is exactly on cue with what I was hoping would happen for you.” What’s more, I’m dreaming again, something I haven’t done in a long time, and that’s a good indication that I’m sinking into the deeper, more restorative stages of sleep. Read Michael Breus, Ph.D.'s blog in which he troubleshoots the most common issues that come up for people undergoing a sleep treatment. Read Shelley's first blog on her sleep program here. Shelley Levitt is an editor at large for Live Happy.

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It’s Not Easy Being Teen (or the Mom of One)

As we continue with Live Happy’s 90 Days to a Happier You challenge, join contributing editor Susan Kane for part two of her blog series as she works to improve communication with her teenage daughter Coco. Whenever my daughter Coco and I get into a fight—when I feel the tears hot behind my eyes and see no way to restore our relationship back to a fun, loving one—I reach for the notes from my sessions with Michele Gravelle, my 90-Day challenge coach. Usually, I find some nugget of wisdom that allows me to go back to Coco and make things OK again, or at least better than they were. The most surprising, upsetting and possibly most effective suggestion was for me to keep a journal and jot down whatever is going through my mind right after an interaction with Coco. Looking at my emotions I didn’t think I was capable of having a less-than-loving thought about her. Was I feeling little peeved? Sure. But having to record my thoughts in the heat of the moment forced me to face just how angry I really felt. I wasn’t just angry….I was ANGRY. “It’s not always the words you say,” Michele told me, “but it’s your tone, your posture, what she sees in your face.” When I realized that Coco was seeing that rage directed at her, I sobbed. Since then, I have been able to stop myself before getting so mad. I remind myself first of how much I love her, and also that she is the kid in the relationship and I’m supposed to be the grownup! Self-compassion and self-forgiveness I was hard on myself when I read my journal, but Michele helped so much by reminding me to be more self-forgiving. She also asked me to examine my expectations around how Coco “should” behave and what our relationship “should” be like. When I catch myself getting too hard on myself, Michele says, think about statements like the following: “I forgive myself for judging Coco as belligerent. I forgive myself for wanting something different from her.” It sounds kind of corny, but it has made me feel better. Don't get “hooked” Michelle urges me to notice where I get “hooked”—in other words, when my buttons get pushed—and try to “rewrite the script.” The other day, Coco said something to me along the lines of, “Your outfit is ugly!” My feelings were hurt and I asked for an apology. When she then said “Sooorry” in that totally unsorry teenage way, I heard myself utter that typical-mommy phrase: “Say you’re sorry like you mean it!” Michele suggested that next time, instead of falling into a trap like that exchange, I try to get curious and turn things around by asking Coco a question, like what kind of fashion advice she would give me. (After giving birth to two kids, this body would not be well served in a crop top and skinny jeans, but I think just asking Coco for her advice, even if I don't take it, would probably have made things better.) The hardest years Despite Michele’s excellent tips, Coco and I continue to struggle sometimes when we communicate. She wants me near her and yet she pushes me away, at times leaving me feeling rejected and confused. But I have to remind myself that I’m the lucky one here. I’m a happily married grownup with a job I love. Coco is 13, and doesn’t that say it all? Being 13 stinks! My next coaching session is only five days away, and until then, I’m going to do my best to make life easier for the teenager in my life, whom I love with all my heart. Read Susan's coach Michele Gravelle's blog about maintaining healthy communication, here. Catch up by reading Susan's original blog here, if you haven't already. Susan Kane is a contributing editor at Live Happy.

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How to Get to Sleep and Stay Asleep

Dr. Michael Breus, Ph.D., troubleshoots your sleep treatment. We are halfway through the 90 Days to a Happier You challenge to change our habits and live better in 2016. Perhaps you've been following the advice from sleep expert Dr. Michael Breus's previous post, 6 Steps to Better Sleep. Here he addresses the most common issues that come up for patients going through his sleep treatment. Q: How do I know this treatment will work? A: These suggestions have been developed by clinical psychologists and tested in sleep clinics throughout the world. About 75 percent of chronic insomniacs have been shown to benefit from these procedures, with a 50 to 60 percent improvement in the time it takes someone to fall asleep and helping people stay asleep. This is not a magic cure, but it will help you take control of your sleep and deal with future sleep problems you encounter. However, you must follow the suggestions consistently, every night, in order for them to be effective. In many studies, when patients followed the treatment only “selectively,” their sleep remained poor. Q: Regarding the sleep deprivation part of the program, I’m reluctant to postpone my bedtime until I’m tired because I don’t want to miss the most refreshing portion of a night’s sleep. How can I avoid that? A: Although deep sleep (the most nourishing sleep) usually occurs during the first part of the evening, it will always occur first, no matter what time you go to bed. What you miss is usually REM sleep, which is not as crucial. Q: I can’t stay awake until my prescribed bedtime. What should I do? A: Start by making a list of activities that will keep you engaged until the right bedtime and then refer to the list when you are feeling sleepy. For example, you can do something physical like exercise, cleaning or walking the dog. You can catch up on emails or balance the checkbook. Do not, however, do something passive such as read or watch a movie, as this will only put you to sleep. Q. What should I do if I can’t fall asleep once I’m finally in bed or I wake up in the middle of the night and can’t fall back asleep? A: If you’re unable to fall asleep within 20 to 30 minutes, get out of bed. This isn’t a punishment because you can’t sleep, it is a way to re-establish the association of sleep with the bedroom. Lying in bed trying to sleep only increases anxiety and frustration, which makes it harder to sleep. If it is too cold, have a robe sitting on the foot of the bed or an extra blanket. If you do not know what to do when you get up, make a list of possible non-stimulating activities to do during the night (for example, reading, prayer, letter writing, watching a pre-taped relaxing movie, listening to soft music, meditating, etc.) Do not try to schedule your day, do anything physical or get on the computer—these are too stimulating. Q. But what if, as soon as I do get out of bed, I think I’m going to fall back asleep any minute? A: To avoid more restlessness and frustration in bed, you want to be sure your sleep drive is, in fact, strong enough to allow you to fall back asleep within a few minutes. A good rule of thumb, the amount of time you’re awake before you get out of bed is the time you must stay out of bed. For example, if it takes you 25 minutes to get up and out of the bed, then you shouldn’t go back to sleep for 25 or so minutes—or until your body clearly tells you that you are very sleepy (see below). Q. Once I get out of bed, I’m afraid I’ll stay up all night and never get back to sleep. What should I do? A: The longer you stay up the quicker you will fall asleep when you return to bed, providing that you stop worrying about your sleep. It’s important to be able to recognize when you are getting sleepy. For example, are your eyelids heavy? Your limbs heavy? Are you beginning to yawn a lot? If so then it’s time to return to bed. Q. Can I sleep in on weekends? A: It is incredibly important that you wake up at your prescribed time consistently. Insomniacs are notorious for messing up their biological clocks. This is how you can fix it. First of all get an alarm clock if you don’t have one. Get a few and place them around the room. Have your partner wake you. Exercise with someone in the morning, lift the shades and get some light. Schedule activities that will make you get out of bed. Whatever works for you, but you must wake up at the prescribed time every day. Q: What if I fall asleep in other places besides the bedroom? A: This is common for insomniacs. As much as you can, try to get back to the bed to sleep; remember we are trying to associate the bed with sleeping. Q: I like to read or watch TV before bed. Why should I stop? A: For some people, reading or watching TV is sleep-inducing. Try this test: When you read or watch TV, how long does it take you to fall asleep? If it is more than 30 minutes, it is highly unlikely that this activity is helping you sleep. Is it your partner or you who likes this ritual? If it’s your partner, try to get him or her to let you take the TV out of the bedroom, at least until you can get your sleep back under some control. Is the bedroom the only place you or your partner can do these things? Try to identify other places where the two of you can read together or watch TV. The bedroom should be reserved for sleep. Dr. Michael Breus, Ph.D., DABSM The Sleep Doctor ™ thesleepdoctor.com To see Michael's recommendations in action, read sleep intervention "subject" Shelley Levitt's blog here. Listen to Michael himself explain how to overcome chronic insomnia on our podcast! Michael Breus, Ph.D., is a diplomate of the American Boardof Sleep Medicine and a fellow of the American Academyof Sleep Medicine. His books include Good Night: The Sleep Doctor's 4-week Program to Better Sleep and Better Health and The Sleep Doctor’s Diet Plan: Lose Weight Through Better Sleep.

Self-Care

8 Great Happiness Perks You Get From Exercise

Even if you’ve never experienced the elusive runner’s high, you probably know exercise can make you happier. Scientific research has shown there are countless connections between mind and body; to simplify a complicated process: exercise boosts dopamine and other chemicals in the brain that make us feel happier. What’s more, many kinds of exercise can put us in a wonderful “flow” state, which is one of the hallmarks of well-being, according to positive psychology. Beyond happy chemicals, though, here are eight more surprising ways exercise makes us happier. 1. Leads to achievements When we have a goal, we become more engaged with life and excited about the future. Whether it’s jogging your first mile without stopping or exercising three times a week, having a goal initially sparks enthusiasm, and then making progress toward that goal really fuels our commitment and makes us feel good. It may even motivate us to plan and accomplish other goals! 2. Creates “me” time Picture your exercise time as a mini-retreat for some healthy “me” time. We often think of “me” time as sitting by a fire with a cup of tea or reading a book, but a good sweat session can help you let go of stress, increase your energy and think with clarity. Even on those days when you aren’t in the mood to move, you will always feel better after you exercise, because when you feel fully charged, it’s much easier to be happy. 3. Retains your quality of life as you age Staying in good cardiovascular shape and using your muscles can help prevent injuries and illness as you age. It also can help you with everyday movements (functional fitness) that involve lifting, carrying, bending and stretching as you get older. Retaining your quality of life is an essential ingredient to your future happiness. 4. Pushes you beyond your normal limits Whether it’s going to a spin class, signing up for your first 5K or doing yoga for the first time, exercise is an opportunity to challenges yourself—to do something that scares you simply for the sense of exhilaration you’ll feel. When you do something outside your comfort zone, you may just surprise yourself with your abilities and gain an incredible sense of satisfaction and pride. 5. Leads to social connections Gym memberships, group fitness classes, charitable walks and running groups are all opportunities to connect with others, which is big when it comes to happiness. Be a part of a healthy group of friends and watch your mood soar. 6. Inspires those around you Let your actions speak for you. Lace up your sneakers, trot off to the gym or take a long bike ride. Your children will notice. Show your kids that physical activity is something you value and they will value it as well. Plus, you never know who else you might be inspiring, such as a parent or coworker. 7. Builds up your self-confidence Doing what you set out to do and sticking with it is the fastest way to invest in your self-confidence. Savor the amazing feeling of making exercise a habit, getting stronger or enjoying clothes again. As your muscles grow stronger, so will your self-esteem. 8. Brings out the kid in you Remember the days of running around outside for hours and coming in smelling of fresh air? Tap into that childhood freedom by finding an exercise that feels more like play, whether it’s a game of pick-up basketball or a joyful Zumba class. Added perk? You will sleep like a baby. Read more: Healthy From the Inside Out: 5 Tips to Get Fit Sandra Bienkowski is a regular contributor to Live Happy and the founder and CEO ofTheMediaConcierge.net.

Self-Care

Happier at Work in Just 11 Minutes

When was the last time you felt really energized and excited about your work? A few hours ago? A few years ago? When it comes to enjoying our work, some days are clearly better than others. But what if you could find something to enjoy every day in your job? Show your strengths Last year Live Happy, the VIA Institute and I helped more than 2,000 people around the world to create an 11-minute daily strength habit to see if this made it possible to be happier at work. While there is a growing body of evidence about the benefits of developing our strengths—those things we’re good at and enjoy doing—the truth is, most of us struggle to find the time to fit it in. So we tried to shrink the time needed make developing your strengths busy-proof by harnessing the brain’s neurological habit loop of cue, routine and reward. It turned out that just 11 minutes each day of doing what they did best each day was enough to help many participants feel more engaged, energized and flourishing at work. New habits that take eleven minutes or less Here are some of the most popular daily strengths habits people tried during the one week global Strengths Challenge: Curiosity: Learning one new thing each day—When I turn on my computer (cue), I will spend 10 minutes reading something new and make a note of what I learn (routine). I will then open my emails (who knows what’s in there!) (reward). Creativity: Finding fresh solutions—When I sit down for my morning coffee (cue), I’ll spend 10 minutes brainstorming as many ideas, solutions, possibilities to a problem or opportunity our team is facing (routine). I’ll share the best three ideas with another team member (reward). Fairness: Being fair to others—When reviewing my schedule each morning (cue), I’ll look for one thing I can do today to make life a little easier for my colleagues or a client (routine). Then I’ll grab my morning coffee (reward). Gratitude: Creating a daily gratitude habit—When I pack up to go home (cue), I’ll take a few minutes to thank someone for how they made my day a little better or easier (routine). Then I’ll go home (reward). Perseverance: Delivering what matters most—Each morning when I complete my daily planner (cue), I will prioritize the three goals I most need to accomplish (routine). I will tick these off as I go (reward). If you gave yourself the gift of just 11 minutes a day to just a little more of what you do best, what might your habit look like? For more information, go to strengthschallenge.com. Michelle McQuaid is a best-selling author and coach with a Masters in Applied Positive Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania.

Top 10 Happiness Books You Don’t Want To Miss in 2016

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Top 10 Books That Will Change Your Life in 2016

Our preview of 10 carefully selected books will help you craft a happier life filled with small moments of meaning and the occasional flash of triumph. Step out of your comfort zone and make 2016 a year to thrive. 1. Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges By Amy Cuddy Try standing in the Superwoman pose. Feeling more confident already? Harvard professor Amy Cuddy, known for her TED talk on power poses, says we can tackle things that once terrified us with small changes in our body language and mindset. Read real stories of people who have flourished by harnessing the power of their own presence. 2. The Happiness Equation: Want Nothing + Do Anything = Have Everything By Neil Pasricha Best-selling author of The Book of Awesome, Neil Pasricha sets out to change how you think about your time, career, family and your happiness in this latest book. He explores the nine secrets to happiness, including the belief that retirement is a broken theory, success doesn’t lead to happiness, and multitasking is a myth. 3. Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand In the Sun and Be Your Own Person By Shonda Rhimes Shonda Rhimes, creator of TV shows such as Grey’s Anatomy, Scandal and How to Get Away with Murder, is an introvert and workaholic who dreads public appearances. When her sister tells her that she “never says yes to anything,” she takes up the challenge. Year of Yes is a heartfelt and funny look at the terrifying and sometimes embarrassing moments of saying yes and overcoming some of her greatest fears, from public speaking to appearing on late-night TV. 4. Yoga and the Pursuit of Happiness: A Beginner's Guide to Finding Joy in Unexpected Places By Sam Chase True happiness can be simpler than we ever thought possible with the help of yoga. Why yoga? This ancient practice helps overcome discontent by quieting the mind and aligning our actions with our purpose. Yoga, this book implores, helps you realize that small, everyday moments infused with meaning, and not grand gestures, ultimately lead to happiness. 5. Live Happy: Ten Practices for Choosing Joy By Deborah Heisz Live Happy Chief Operating Officer and Co-founder Deborah Heisz, along with the editors of Live Happy magazine, bring you the latest research on the practices and actions that contribute to a happy life through deeply meaningful stories from everyday people and celebrities alike. Alanis Morissette, Shawn Achor, Gretchen Rubin and Jason Mraz are just a few of the people who reveal how small tweaks in your attitude and behavior can greatly enhance your daily joy. 6. The Here and Now Habit: How Mindfulness Can Help You Break Unhealthy Habits Once and for All By Hugh G. Byrne This thoughtful tome shows us how to break bad habits like constantly checking email and emotional over-eating by learning how to practice mindfulness. Mindfulness, the author claims, means creating healthier habits so you can stop living on autopilot and start living in the present. 7. Balanced and Barefoot: How Unrestricted Outdoor Play Makes for Strong, Confident, and Capable Children By Angela J. Hanscom Unstructured freedom of movement and outdoor play are vital for children’s cognitive development and growth, according to Angela J. Hanscom, pediatric occupational therapist and founder of TimberNook, an international nature-based program. Kids need rough-and-tumble outdoor play to develop their sensory, motor and executive functions, according to Angela. Instead, many lead sedentary lifestyles that can lead to health and cognitive difficulties. This book shows parents how to help their children thrive—even in an urban environment. 8. The Best Place To Work: The Art and Science of Creating an Extraordinary Workplace By Ron Friedman, Ph.D. In this book, award-winning psychologist Ron Friedman explains how to create a better workplace that will increase productivity and meaning at work. He shares his findings in the fields of motivation, creativity, behavioral economics and neuroscience. Filled with best practices, Ron shows how to boost creativity so that workers can make better decisions and generally feel more alive at work. 9. The Happiness Track: How to Apply the Science of Happiness to Accelerate Your Success By Emma Seppala, Ph.D. The latest findings in cognitive psychology and neuroscience reveal that our happiness has a profound effect on our professional lives by increasing our productivity as well as our emotional and social intelligence. Stanford researcher Emma Seppala explains that our outdated notion of equating success with living in a stressed-out, overdrive mode prevents sustainable happiness. Put yourself on the path to success with her practical steps. 10. Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance By Angela Duckworth Renowned positive psychologist Angela Duckworth shows us that the secret to outstanding achievement is not talent, but a focused persistence called grit. Identifying your passion and following through on your commitments are factors that contribute more to success than talent alone. In her first book, she explains and expounds on her groundbreaking research on grit, which shows that it may be more indicative of success than factors such as IQ or genetics. Read more: 10 Life-Changing Books That Will Stay With You Forever Sandra Bienkowski is a regular contributor to Live Happy and the founder and CEO of TheMediaConcierge.net.

Self-Care

5 Tips to Get Past the Post-Holiday Crash

It’s the start of a new year, but January can be tough when it comes to feeling happy. The holiday festivities are over, the gift-giving bills are coming in, the routine workweek has returned, and, in many places, the gloomy winter days are starting to take a toll. It’s no wonder the third Monday of January has been dubbed the most depressing day of the year, with some calling it Blue Monday. January might not be considered the most joyful month, but there’s no need to let the post-holiday blues dominate the first few weeks of 2023. Kick off the year positively by using these five tips to stay happy (even when the air is frigid and the festiveness has faded!): 1. Choose a word of the year Studies have shown that New Year’s resolutions can be very hard to keep, and failing to do so can add to those January blues. Instead of a resolution, choose a word that highlights what you want more of or a specific way you want to feel in 2023. Some word-of-the-year ideas: fun, inspired, love, joy. (Check out more here.) Make your word a priority all year long. Whenever you’re struggling with a decision, ask yourself, “Does this align with my word of the year?” 2. Plan a fun event, large or small The letdown following November and December’s fun events can curtail happiness. After socializing, parties, and festivities, it might feel as if there’s nothing to look forward to, making this is the perfect time to plan something fun. Whether you book a vacation for later in 2023 or schedule brunch with friends next weekend, planning something exciting is a real pick-me-up during these dreary days. 3. Pick up Your Pen When the days are short and your mood is low, try doing something we rarely do anymore: Write a letter to a loved one who lives far away, or find a pen pal via sites like Adopt a Soldier or More Love Letters or The Letter Writers Alliance. Having something positive to do (sending letters!) and the possibility of receiving personal mail will brighten up dull days. 4. Set a positive alarm clock If you use the alarm option on your phone to wake you each morning, program the sound it makes to give yourself a positive boost when you wake up. You can download a favorite ringtone, or even record your own wake-up invocation by recording yourself fun sounds and uplifting sayings like “Go smile at yourself in the mirror” or “Go get 'em, tiger!” 5. Create a new routine Getting back to the standard, day-to-day routines can be one of the most disheartening parts of January but you can spice up your schedule by creating a new and fun routine this month! Consider what you really enjoy doing—reading, drinking coffee, chatting with friends, going for walks—and find a way to incorporate what you love into your daily routine. Set aside an hour after dinner for reading or schedule a weekly date with a friend to catch up. It will make the time until spring a lot more joyful. Dani DiPirro is an author, blogger, and designer living in a suburb of Washington, DC. In 2009, she launched the website PositivelyPresent.com with the intention of sharing her insights about living a positive and present life. Dani is the author of Stay Positive, The Positively Present Guide to Life, and a variety of e-books. She is also the founder of Twenty3, a design studio focused on promoting positive, modern graphic design and illustration.

Half Marathon Goes a Long Way Toward Lasting Change

Self-Care

Half-Marathon a Milestone for Lasting Change

Welcome to 2016! I’m going to Disney World! Over the holidays I, like many of you, spent some time examining what I would like to accomplish in the coming year. I set personal, business and family goals. Some will require stopping bad habits (procrastination!) and others will require building new habits (regular sleep). In other words, I will need to change. And change is hard because, as Tal Ben-Shahar shares on the Live Happy Now podcast and in this month’s issue of the magazine, we don’t have much willpower. If you find yourself abandoning your resolutions after a couple of weeks or simply needing some strategies to accomplish change, Live Happy has a ton of information available this month to help you. Five of our staff members are undergoing their own transformations in our 90 Days to a Happier You! challenge. Time for change The great news is that we are all capable of change, and even small changes bring us closer to living the life that we want. I am feeling a sense of accomplishment because of a change I made last year. In late 2014, I took a hard look at my health. With three children and a job that requires travel, I was simply no longer making it to the gym. I was putting on weight and not feeling very energetic. I knew I needed a change. I wanted to add exercise into my life in a way that it became easy. I didn’t want complicated plans; I didn’t want to hire a trainer; and I needed to be able to exercise anywhere in almost every kind of weather with limited to no equipment. So, I took up running. Not born to run, but willing to try I know from reading Live Happy that running has tremendous benefits beyond physical health. Although I have played various sports, I have never enjoyed running. The runner’s high is something I have never experienced, and I am not sure I believe it exists. My spouse, on the other hand, has run four marathons, a half Ironman and too many half marathons for me to remember. She was quietly thrilled that I had decided to run, but aside from making some shoe and apparel suggestions, largely left me alone to do it my way (which is really the only way I ever do anything). Into the groove I set a goal of being able to run a 5K by Memorial Day and even took the initiative to register for a local race. Then I downloaded a Couch to 5K program and started to run. The idea was to run three times a week. Sometimes I did. Sometimes I didn’t. But, by Memorial Day I had stuck with it enough to lose a few pounds and be ready for the 5K. However, I was sick and couldn’t run. I surprised myself by being disappointed. Then one conversation jump-started my momentum. My run-crazy spouse said she has always wanted to run the Disney marathon. I said I wasn’t going to go to Disney to watch her run and be too weary to move for the rest of the weekend. She said, “If you run the half marathon, we can do it together.” I said OK. The goal Over the next week we researched, spent the money for plane tickets, arranged for her parents to watch the kids, and suddenly I was signed up for a half marathon—13.1 miles—when I hadn’t run more than 3.1 miles in 10 years or more than 10 miles at once since I was 18. Commitment—around the world, and back home So to start off this year, I am going to Disney World! I have prepared. Running has become a regular part of my life. I have run in Central Park and along the streets of NYC; in Cincinnati; Long Beach, California; on a cruise ship treadmill in San Jose; on a treadmill in Mexico City; on the beach in Gulf Shores, Alabama; and all over my neighborhood at home in Texas where my neighbors honk and wave. I am ready and excited! I have made real change, and this run will be a celebration of that accomplishment for me. I am not sure how I will do in the race. I still don’t love to run. And I am very slow. But it doesn’t matter. I achieved the goal of having a workout plan to fit my lifestyle. See how it goes! If you’d like to follow along and cheer or jeer me on the morning of the January 9 run, I will be on social media live from the event. You can follow on Twitter @dheisz on Instagram @debheisz or on Facebook/livehappy. Please share your goals and successes with our team in the Comments below or @livehappy on Twitter or on our Facebook page. Here’s to lasting change for us all in 2016! Deborah K. Heisz is the co-founder and editorial director of Live Happy.

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5 Tips to Get Past the Post-Holiday Crash

Half-Marathon a Milestone for Lasting Change

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