Author Maxine Hong Kigston's poetry box

Poetry in a Box

The little box on the little pole fooled me at first. It looked like the ones real estate agents plant in front yards. But then I realized this pole said “Poetry” on it, and behind the box’s clear plastic door stood copies of “Blessings,” a poem by Ronald Wallace. “Please take one,” said writing on the door. I did. The poem was upbeat and funny and just what I needed. I smiled at the yellow ranch house behind the box and silently thanked the person who lived there for making my day. Serendipity by the side of the road Such moments, I soon learned, have been happening all over the country. Poetry boxes—also known as poetry poles or posts—first popped up in yards, parks and other spots about 20 years ago. Now there are at least 500 of them nationwide, according to David Cooke, a landscaper who has a poetry box outside his home in Portland, Oregon, and also builds them as a side business. The boxes cluster in such places as Portland and St. Tammany Parish, Louisiana, and range from prefab plastic to hand-hewn mahogany. “It’s kind of like an un-virtual Facebook page,” David says. Like other owners, he finds that poetry boxes boost a sense of community. “They’re a really good focal point, a conversation starter.” “To me it’s like putting out a bird feeder,” says author Maxine Hong Kingston. Through her windows in Oakland, California, she watches passers-by read poems from the box that’s screwed onto her purple rain birch tree. “That makes me really happy. Sometimes there are several people and one will read aloud to another one.” What attracts such readers? “The poems I put out there are about enjoying the world and loving life, so to me that kind of inspiration is food.” A little lift when you need it Indeed, Maxine’s neighbor Alice Friedemann finds visiting Oakland’s poetry boxes “a treat to look forward to, like a candy bar.” And as a science writer who blogs about dwindling natural resources and other woes, she often needs that treat. Take a foggy morning last fall. Alice, in a grim mood, stopped by a poetry box containing “This Splendid Speck” by Paul Boswell. There are no peacocks on Venus, the poem begins. No oak trees or water lilies on Jupiter.…Instantly, she felt better. “It reminded me of what a miracle this planet really is and how lucky we are to live here,” she says. Now she keeps that poem on her desk to nosh on whenever she gets gloomy. Poetry boxes are “a way to inject joy into somebody’s life,” she says. Kathie Smith-Hetterich, a retired school psychologist, feels equally sustained by a neighbor’s box in Rochester, New York. “It’s a way to touch something spiritual as opposed to all the day-to-day stuff,” she says. As it happens, the box Kathie visits is the one I stumbled upon during a walk. Its owner, I learned months later when I found her mowing her lawn, is an English professor named Cathy Smith. One recent evening she invited me inside the yellow ranch house. A shared neighborhood asset Her poetry box is a great way to connect with neighbors, she said as we chatted at her kitchen table. Like many owners, she discovers gifts tucked inside her box: poems, book reviews and once even a $20 bill. People eagerly remind her when it’s time to put in a new poem, and the little girl next door loves telling her what color paper to use. I left Cathy’s home that night with her words etched in my memory: “Poetry connects us to ourselves and to each other. It awakens what we don’t take time to nourish because we’re so busy.” Visitors to poetry boxes often pay the joy forward with boxes of their own or other things. Artist and teacher Martha Schermerhorn, for instance, says Cathy’s box inspired her to launch a local “round robin” writing club: one person starts a short story, emails it to another who adds to it, and so on: “The point is just to be creative, expressive. The neighbors just embraced it.” And now it’s my turn. The other day, Cathy emailed to say that her sister no longer has a spot for her own poetry box. Would I like it? Would I ever. Read more: Does Reading Fiction Make Us Nicer? Read more: 10 Ways to Build Community Melissa Balmain is a humorist, journalist and teacher. She is also the author of Walking in on People, a full-length collection of poetry.
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Younger woman holding older woman's hands.

Start a Ripple of Kindness in Your Community

This past week, I was checking out at the grocery store with my three daughters. I was in “go mode,” as in let’s-check-out-as-fast-as-possible-and-go because my 4-year-old was starting to lose it. While I was juggling the cart, shopping bags and my wallet, my 7-year-old tugged my sleeve and pointed to a basket full of golden Cadbury Eggs (strategically placed at child height). “Look mommy, the sign says they are free!” A quick glance assured me that they were most definitely not free. “No, sweetie,” I replied hastily, “The sign says buy one, get one free.” She paused and then reasoned, “So, that means you can get two!” I am well practiced at turning down my kids’ entreaties for candy, so I off-handedly quipped that “maybe the Easter bunny would bring them a Cadbury Egg.” I should have known that that would only lead to more questions about how much longer it was until Easter…and then of course, more tears. Candy from a stranger As we zoomed out of the grocery store, I heard a woman’s voice calling from behind me. “Ma’am!” I turned around and saw the woman and her daughter who had been standing behind us in line rushing toward us. “For your girls,” the mother said breathlessly, extending out to me a giant chocolate bar. And just as quickly as they appeared, they were gone. Shocked, I paused for a moment in the parking lot, contemplating what had just happened. Someone had gone out of her way to bring my children an unexpected sliver of happiness! Humbled and overwhelmed, I got into my car and shared the story with my kids, whose faces of course broke into huge smiles when they saw the chocolate bar. Immediately, they began asking if we could buy chocolate bars for other people, too. This woman’s random act of kindness probably cost one dollar and took less than one minute to complete, but her actions left a deep impression on my family. Kindness begets more kindness I often talk about the science behind conscious acts of kindness through my work at GoodThink (a positive psychology consulting firm), but I found it was a powerful experience to be on the receiving end of kindness and in the position to carry that ripple effect forward. Over the past year, I spent quite a bit of time reading source material for my upcoming book,The Future of Happiness, and I became fascinated with the mechanism behind what makes an individual take action on an idea. It turns out that in almost every case, a person or a specific event functions as a catalyst for decision making, which means that if we see our actions as catalytic events for the positive, we can harness incredible energy and power to impact the world for the better. In fact, simply observing an act of kindness can set a cascade of generosity into motion and make others significantly more willing to try acts of kindness themselves. In a famous experiment from 1966, researchers studied whether or not other drivers would stop to lend a hand to a “lady in distress” with a flat tire. Half of the drivers passing by had seen a staged setting with a young male helping a girl just beforehand, while the other half of the drivers had not. The study found that the presence of a positive model significantly increased the altruistic behaviors of other drivers, creating a catalytic event that rippled positivity beyond the bounds of the experiment and unconsciously shaped behavior in a powerful way. A daisy chain of giving When a customer at the drive-through window of a Tim Hortons coffee shop decided to pick up the tab for the stranger in the car behind her, the customer, surprised and delighted, decided to pay for the following customer as well, resulting in a 226-customer streak of generosity over the next three hours. This phenomenon was repeated in 2014 when a Starbucks customer’s act of kindness resulted in a 378-customer streak over 11 hours. In each of these cases, a single act of altruism created a powerful ripple effect that extended far beyond the people in line—these stories became an internet sensation and a catalyst for other random acts of kindness in communities across the globe. What kind of ripple effect can you start in your community? Next month, you can help Live Happy celebrate the fourth annual International Day of Happiness by participating in #HappyActs, and doing various kindnesses for friends and strangers during the month of March. Go to HappyActs.org to sign up for daily texts, podcasts, videos and articles to prompt your altruism. Maybe you can organize a neighborhood cleanup effort, deliver flowers to a neighbor, or just hold the door for a stranger. The beauty of #HappyActs is that you do not have to have a lot of time or money or status or even connections—you just have to have a willingness to make someone’s day just a bit brighter and the follow-through to accomplish it. If you need more stories or ideas to help get your creative juices flowing, check out the Nobly app (available for iPhone and Android). Or if you are looking for a daily inspiration, check out Deedtags, an app that challenges users to complete simple daily missions. Tweet your #HappyActs @LiveHappy and they will appear on our tagboard! Amy Blankson, aka the ‘Happy Tech Girl,’ is on a quest to find strategies to help individuals balance productivity and well-being in the digital era. Amy, with her brother Shawn Achor, co-founded GoodThink, which brings the principles of positive psychology to lifeand works with organizations such as Google, NASA and the US Army. Her upcoming book is called The Future of Happiness: 5 Modern Strategies for Balancing Productivity and Well-being in the Digital Era (April 2017).
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Young woman holding a book and smiling.

Top 10 Books That Will Change Your Life in 2017

Set aside some reading time and stock your shelves with these 10 exceptional new books, which cover a range of illuminating topics from the way technology affects our well-being to how to live a compassionate life. Make 2017 happier and more fulfilling by giving yourself the gift of continued learning. 1. The Future of Happiness: 5 Modern Strategies for Balancing Productivity and Well-Being In the Digital Era by Amy Blankson Overwhelmed by the flood of apps and information online? Discover how to navigate technology in a way that enhances your happiness. Amy Blankson, cofounder of the digital consulting firm GoodThink, reveals five strategies to thrive in the digital age. Start by using your power of choice to scan for the positive. Learn how to use technology as a sixth sense to better understand yourself and the world around you. 2. The Little Book of Hygge: Danish Secrets to Happy Living by Meik Wiking We've heard countless times that Danes are the happiest people in the world, and hygge, which translates roughly as "cozy" or "homey," may be the key, according to Meik Wiking, CEO of the Happiness Research Institute in Copenhagen. Breaking bread with friends at a table topped with flickering candles; curling up in front of a fire with a good book—these are prime examples of hygge-based happiness. Curling up in front of a fire with a book about hygge? Double-Danish happiness! 3. The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World by Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu Your personal hardships can turn to joy. Nobel Peace Prize laureates His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu credit personal experiences of hardship and oppression for their eventual ability to lead the joyful lives they live today. Discover the eight pillars of joy to overcome fear, stress, anger, grief and illness. Suffering might be inevitable, according to this dynamic duo, but how we respond to it is our choice. 4. How to Live a Good Life: Soulful Stories, Surprising Science, and Practical Wisdom by Jonathan Fields Author and entrepreneur Jonathan Fields believes a good life is made up of three buckets: a bucket of vitality, a bucket of connection and a bucket of contribution. Using science-backed and actionable tips, he shows the reader how to fill each of these buckets in just 30 days. Tap into your purpose, the book advises, and do meaningful work in order to vastly improve your life and find maximum happiness. 5. Getting Grit: The Evidence-Based Approach to Cultivating Passion, Perseverance, and Purpose byCaroline Miller Positive psychology author and coach Caroline Miller believes our level of grit is fundamental to living a fulfilled life. This guidebook to building grit offers self-assessment tools, daily exercises and life tips to boost courage and willpower. She explores the key traits of gritty people, how true grit inspires others and how humility and self-compassion also play a role in authentic grit. 6. The Dog's Guide to Your Happiness: Seven Secrets for a Better Life from Man's Best Friend by Garry McDaniel and Sharon Massen Want to be happier? Look to your pooch! Our canine companions can show us what authentic joy is truly about, say authors Garry McDaniel and Sharon Massen, both professors at Franklin University. The book explores seven traits that are essential for happiness through the eyes of our trusted furry friends. We can learn how to let go of stress, the book advises, and get lost in the art of play by watching our dogs just do their thing. Our furry friends can also show us the value of loyalty and unconditional love. 7. At Home in the World: Stories and Essential Teachings from a Monk's Life by Thich Nhat Hanh Put the power of hope to work in your life. Peace activist and Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh draws from his travels as well as stories and traditions from his childhood in rural Vietnam to share important life insights and lessons. “Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today,” he writes. 8. Mindshift: Break Through Obstacles to Learning and Discover Your Hidden Potential by Barbara Oakley, Ph.D. Learn how to uncover and develop talents you don’t realize you had—no matter what your age or background. Instead of just following your passions, discover how to broaden your passions. InMindshift, Barbara Oakley, Ph.D., draws on neuroscientific insights to turn perceived weaknesses into strengths and overcome preconceptions with the right mindset. Feeling behind if you start a new career path later in life? Use the skills you’ve already acquired to bring valuable insights to a new discipline. 9. The Leading Brain: Powerful Science-Based Strategies for Achieving Peak Performance by Friederike Fabritius and Hans W. Hagemann Use the latest research in brain science to improve how you perform and iteract at work. Combining their expertise in neuropsychology and management consulting, neuropsychologist Friederike Fabritius and leadership expert Hans W. Hagemann, Ph.D., show how to sharpen your focus, improve your performance, retain information, make better complex decisions and cultivate trust to build strong teams. 10. The Big Picture: A Guide to Finding Your Purpose in Life by Christine B. Whelan If you’ve ever wondered what you are going to do with your life, this book is for you. Though aimed at college graduates, The Big Picture is a guide for anyone who would like to discover their talents and create a fulfilling career and life. Author Christine B. Whelan, Ph.D. uses quizzes and leading questions such as, "What are my talents? How can I use them to help others and create meaning? in order to help each reader find a path to a purposeful life. Sandra Bienkowski is a regular contributor to Live Happy and the founder and CEO ofTheMediaConcierge.net.
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kid dressed up as astronaut.

4 Tips to Raise High-Achieving Kids

When I was a new mom, I met a couple I’ll call the Jacksons whose primary goal was to raise their children to become achievement-oriented adults. While this is a common wish for parents, the Jacksons had a fairly extreme way of going about it. When their son was less than a year old, the Jacksons initiated a family policy that no one was to give him anything; if he wanted something, he had to learn to get it for himself. The Jacksons truly believed that if their child had just the bare minimum (of food, clothing, etc.) and was always in need, he would be motivated to find a way to get whatever he wanted on his own—setting him on the path to eventual success. In contrast, many “helicopter parents” harbor the same dreams for their children and yet lean toward the opposite extreme by hovering—offering too much guidance and praise. My experience has been that both of these parenting styles ultimately may do a disservice to children and impede their confidence and success. As a therapist, I suggest a middle-ground approach to parenting that yields the best outcomes for children in terms of success, psychological well-being and self-confidence. Albert Bandura, a psychologist and expert in cognitive development, developed the concept of “self-efficacy”—the way people view themselves as capable and productive makes a tremendous difference in their success. The best way for parents to help children accomplish this is by providing appropriate guidance, support and praise, while allowing for experimentation and even failure. The following key elements are essential for raising children to become motivated, successful and goal-oriented adults. Read more: Which Kind of Goal-Setter Are You? 1. Help kids build confidence in themselves Believing in yourself builds confidence, improves self-esteem and makes both children and adults take more risks, feel more motivated and work harder. If you want to teach your children to feel confident in who they are and their achievements, help them learn their strengths, tell them you believe in their abilities and point out both past and present successes. It may sound simple, but past achievements DO build future successes. Example: Your child is starting a new class, activity or sport. Let her know that it is normal to be worried about something new, but also that she has certain skills that she can use to apply to this new situation. Be specific about what those skills are and give examples of when she has used those skills successfully. 2. Help them understand the "Why" I have heard so many parents utter the following overused phrases: “because I said so,” “you have to do that because it’s your homework assignment” or “the coach/teacher/tutor/school said so.” While each of these statements may be true, they do not explain the reasons or benefits of doing that task. Homework builds skills, allows for practice and teaches concepts outside of the classroom. Our children need to understand these reasons, not simply that they have a duty. Example: Your child says, “I don’t like to read. I think it is boring and I am not good at it.” You respond that it’s OK, not everyone likes reading, but reading is important. You make it clear that as he grows older there will be lots of things he will need to read and understand, and the only way to do that is to practice. Read more: Making Motivation Work 3. Teach kids to look inward for competition and achievement Goal-oriented children learn that trying to do better than they did yesterday and the day before is much more important than trying to be equal to or greater than someone else. Each of us has a unique set of skills and abilities, and we need to focus on honing them so that we can maximize our own growth. During the recent Olympics in Rio, it was clear that swimmer Michael Phelps’ disappointment in his London performance in 2012 was a stronger motivation to excel than any rivalry. Example: Your child says, “Johnny is better than I am at math” or “Alexandra runs so much faster than I do.” The response should be something like the following: “Johnny and Alexandra will be better at some things than you are, and you will be better at other things than they are; we do not need to compare. Instead, let’s talk about how much faster you are than you were in second grade and figure out how we can help you get faster before next year.” 4. Help kids set reasonable goals and make plans to accomplish them Goal setting starts at an early age. It begins when kids learn to do homework before watching TV, or how to clean their rooms and make their beds in an efficient and effective way. As parents, we need to teach our kids what types of goals are reasonable and then help them strategize a way to get them accomplished. Example: Your child has a big project due in two weeks. You sit down with her to discuss how long it will take, what days she will work on it and the best way to get it done well. Then follow up with her to make sure she is keeping on schedule. If we as parents can provide support and guidance while giving kids the stepping stones to develop their own confidence and self-esteem—and let them learn their own lessons through experience—they will be well on their way to success. Read more: Are You Making This Common Parenting Mistake? Stacy Kaiser is a licensed psychotherapist, author, relationship expert and media personality. She is also the author of the best-selling book, How to Be a Grown Up: The Ten Secret Skills Everyone Needs to Know, and an editor-at-large for Live Happy. Stacy is a frequent guest on television programs such as Today and Good Morning America.
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Dean Karnazes running an ultramarathon.

Dean Karnazes Goes the Extra Mile

Imagine crossing the finish line as you complete your first marathon. You are maxed out mentally and physically; your legs are like overstretched rubber bands and your lungs are on fire. You feel like crying, but you are not sure if it is from extreme joy or pain; it’s probably both. Then imagine doing it again five times over. For ultramarathoner and author Dean Karnazes, a 150-mile race is just another day at the office, and he can finish a marathon before your first coffee break. “There is a saying I have, ‘there is magic in misery,’ ” Dean says. “If you have ever run a marathon, believe it or not, as bad as it was and how bad it hurt, there is magic in it. You feel more alive than at any other point in your life.” That feeling is what keeps him on the perpetual road to finding achievement and meaning. Dean may be an extreme case, but he is a great example of what endurance, drive and grit can accomplish. “It gets to the point where your head is somewhere else,” he says. “You are so focused on the task at hand, and it sounds bizarre to think that for 30-plus hours, but you are really thinking about one single thing. And that is accomplishing your goal. It is that intense.” Dean describes this feeling as “Zen-like” and a unique chance to live in the moment and think about nothing else other than crossing the finish line. This kind of mental focus is often described as “flow,” a state where the mind and body are so in sync that the outer world and even self-consciousness seem to melt away. Researchers claim that this level of engagement is an essential spoke in the happiness wheel. Taking it to the limit Most likely, no one reading this will ever have to endure what Dean goes through to find satisfaction and contentment. But many do find pleasure in running great distances such as marathons, half-marathons, 5K races or any seemingly insurmountable task that we set out to conquer. Dean writes that such feats of strength and personal courage can have profound effects on our well-being, and once we cross the finish line, we are “liberated from the prison of self-doubt and limitations.” Even if we have to nurse our injuries for a week afterward, he says, we have never been freer. The long journey within Dean competes in some of the most mentally and physically taxing races on the planet, including the Badwater Ultramarathon across the sweltering Death Valley desert, a frigid marathon to the South Pole and the punishing Spartathlon in Greece, which he chronicles in his latest book, The Road to Sparta. Set in the rocky terrain of Greece, this annual footrace of 153 miles is the birthplace of the marathon as we know it today and attracts competitors from all around the world. The route retraces the steps of the fabled foot courier Pheidippides who carried important messages back and forth from Athens to Sparta. His job, without the help of energy gels or high-performance running shoes, was to recruit the Spartans to help fight against the massive and breaching Persian army at the battle of Marathon, a role so important that he may have saved the Greeks from tyranny for centuries to come. No pressure. For Dean, whose family descends from Greece, this race was the chance to participate in something bigger than himself; it was a chance to channel history and experience what his ancestors did nearly 2,500 years ago. A personal best Of all his herculean feats in life, the Spartathlon race was a much more personal experience. “It was about finding out who I was as a person and understanding where I came from. It’s more self-discovery and a richer understanding of my heritage and my past,” Dean says. “I think that it’s something that everyone at some level seeks to know. ‘Where did I come from? Who were my people?’ ” His mother’s side of the family is from the carefree island of Ikaria, where life moves slowly and stress is low. His father’s side is a resilient group from the hills of Sparta. The former is where Dean may get his optimistic outlook on life, but the latter is composed of a long line of endurance runners. As a boy, he remembers old folktales of men from Crete running from village to village. He would witness the older people dancing at the local Greek festivals for eight to 10 hours straight and admiring their endurance. This experience went far beyond what any lineage website could bring. “It was really an immersive journey into my past.” Overcoming great odds “Running is such a simple act, but it is profound in its simplicity as well as its complexity,” Dean says. “Let’s face it, running can be mind-numbingly boring.…It can be extremely painful and every runner has a relationship with pain. Everyone else inherently tries to avoid pain and yet we runners embrace it and welcome it.” Through hot and humid wind coming off the Mediterranean Sea, Dean was met with obstacles day and night as he negotiated ankle-breaking terrain across his homeland with a queasy stomach and blistered feet. Admittedly, it wasn’t Dean’s best performance in a race, but he was given a hero’s welcome full of selfies at every checkpoint. “I would say [the Spartathlon] probably is the most grueling ultramarathon on earth…it gets to 100 degrees, but then there’s the terrain. There are points where you are on all fours scaling up the side of a mountain coming into Sparta.” But we as humans have the capability to complete extreme tasks, to hit an extra gear. For ages we have been running long distances. As Dean explains in his book with the help of Professor Paul Cartledge, A.G. Leventis Chair of Greek Culture at Cambridge University, legend holds that Pheidippides may have run back and forth for more than 300 miles, delivering messages amid the famous battle between the Greeks and Persians. He finally reached the end of his journey delivering his final message to Athens, “Nike! (Victory!),” before collapsing to his death. For Dean, “It was a holistic journey, if you will. To think about…the same course I am running on right now, a guy was here 2,500 years ago trying to save democracy. Trying to save all of the things we know today and here was a guy by himself, barefoot with the weight of the world on his shoulders.” Running to save the world Dean is a big believer in uniting people, especially through running. He recently ran a 525 kilometer race on the Silk Road—the ancient trade route spanning from the Mediterranean to China—as a sports ambassador on behalf of the United States. His mission was to connect with people along the way in countries such as Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan and Uzbekistan who don’t often get the chance to see Westerners. On many of his stops, he was greeted with friendly faces and local runners to keep him company on his 50-mile-a-day journey through the high altitudes of Central Asia. “There are so many things in this world that divide us, that separate us: the color of your skin, your race, your religion, your socioeconomic level,” Dean explains. “Running is the great democratizer. There is commonality, no matter where you live or what you look like, you put one foot in front of the other just like every other human and that unites people instead of dividing people. I think that is a beautiful thing.” Listen to the interview with Dean Karnazes on our podcast, Live Happy Now. Chris Libby is the Section Editor at Live Happy magazine.
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Three happy friends together

Be Happy to Live Longer

The search for the fabled Fountain of Youth is almost as old as civilization itself, but has largely been in vain. We have long dreamed of finding a way to avoid aging while at the same time (mostly) accepting its inevitability. However, that hasn’t kept science from looking for ways to slow down the aging process or make our later years more fulfilling. Today, there’s good news for anyone who wants to live a long, happy life. Science has found that happiness, not genetics, is one of the greatest predictors of longevity. Simple lifestyle changes can improve not only your mental health but can also change how your body ages. Just ask Cecile Williams, who didn’t even take her first fitness class until the age of 50. Today, at 77, she leads a busy life that includes trying new fitness classes, hitting Nashville’s famed honky-tonks to catch live music and attending fundraisers for social causes. Nothing about her, including her circle of friends, gives a hint of her age. “I always say I will not hang out with old people,” she says with an infectious smile. “They complain too much. It’s always about ‘my diabetes this’ or ‘I’m too old to do that.’ Too many people blame everything on being old.” Since retiring from a career with the Nashville Parks and Recreation Department more than a decade ago, Cecile’s life has blossomed into a rich adventure evidenced by her jam-packed calendar and strong social connections. Each day, she enjoys some form of exercise, whether it’s yoga, TRX, Pilates or POUND, a high-energy cardio workout that incorporates rock music and choreographed routines using weighted drumsticks. Despite coming late to the fitness habit, today she can’t imagine her life without it—and not just because it helps keep her body strong and staves off the effects of arthritis in her knees. “Being in fitness classes has opened me up to so many experiences I wouldn’t have had otherwise,” she says, crediting the circle of friends she’s made. “It’s made me more diversified, and I am open to doing all kinds of different things that I never thought I’d do. Once I started spending more time with other people, I got more outgoing.” Those friendships have deepened over the years and have led to greater involvement in her community. Her 54-year-old daughter shakes her head at her mother’s latest antics. “She thinks I hang out with wild women,” Cecile laughs. “But she’s proud of all the things I’m doing now. And I am perfectly happy.” Without knowing it, Cecile hasn’t merely been enjoying herself, she has been consistently refilling a prescription for a long, happy life. Body of Evidence New findings indicate that if we are searching for that elusive Fountain of Youth, we probably need to look inside ourselves. Science shows that our thoughts and behavior play a bigger role in aging than we previously realized—and that gives us more say in how well we age. Today, researchers are looking beyond family genetics to find the sources of longevity and well-being. While centenarians share certain genes that protect them from aging, only about 25 percent of our longevity is genetic. The other 75 percent, for better or worse, is a combination of lifestyle and environmental factors. “It is not particularly apparent to us in molecular biology why what the human genome is doing should be connected to everyday life circumstances,” says Steve Cole, Ph.D., a professor of medicine and psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences at the UCLA School of Medicine. “And yet, that connection emerges time and time again. Our everyday life circumstances end up changing the way genomes function.” Genomes basically carry our genetic marching orders, and studying them helps identify the association between our daily habits and longevity. For example, Steve notes, one of the prominent findings is the effect of loneliness on our genes, which has a direct negative effect on our physical well-being. Loneliness, depression and stress are among the factors that create an uptick in inflammation and a downturn of antiviral activity in our bodies. Living with high levels of inflammation for too long will “statistically precipitate heart attacks, degenerative disease and strokes,” says Steve. “Those are three of the major killers of people in modern social settings.” Conventional wisdom has said that a healthy diet and exercise are crucial to improved physical well-being, and so is reducing stress (or at least minimizing our reaction to it). As it turns out, however, the missing piece of the puzzle may involve rethinking what it means to live well. Living Better, Thriving Longer Happy people, it turns out, have fewer symptoms of pain and illness and show slower declines in physical function. A positive mood is shown to reduce blood pressure during stressful times; positive people also miss less work due to illness and have fewer hospital visits over their lifetime. Adopting certain practices, such as gratitude, mindfulness and meditation, may help buffer against stress and lead to greater happiness in the moment as well as better health in the long run. In a study, Steve and happiness researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., looked at how behaviors affect us biologically. They found that even when we are under stress, the way our body absorbs that stress can be very different—and it can be regulated by our own actions. Study participants who practiced acts of kindness for others showed a significant drop in the inflammation caused by white blood cells. Interestingly, study participants who did good deeds like writing a check to a charity or who practiced acts of self-care did not show the same positive effects. This led the researchers to conclude that simply performing small acts of kindness for others can have a big impact on gene regulation. “Prosocial behavior, in particular, has a very good effect on [our] biology,” Steve notes. “Focusing on the happiness of others, focusing on mankind, is both a recipe for happiness and, quite possibly, the recipe for good health.” Change Your Mood, Change Your Life In 1938, Harvard University embarked on a remarkable open-ended research project to look at what creates a long, healthy life. Today, the Harvard Study of Adult Development continues to provide insight into what affects health and longevity, now extending to the descendants of that original research project. What it tells us, says George Vaillant, psychiatrist and director emeritus of the study, is that how well we live is about much more than our genes, jobs, physical exercise or diet. “Genetics has much less effect on how long someone lives than their habits,” says George, who headed the study for 30 years. He cites alcoholism and smoking as the two deadliest practices, and says moderate exercise and a stable weight go hand-in-hand with longevity. Beyond that, he says, longevity depends upon our emotions and relationships. “People who live a long time have a lot of positive emotion,” he says. “And that means being part of a community. It’s hard to have positive emotion on a deserted island; you need other people.” Resilience, or our ability to bounce back from adversity, also affects longevity, but George says the No. 1 antidote to aging is healthy relationships. People who live a long time have a lot of positive emotion and that means being part of a community." –George Vaillant “Positive emotions, by themselves, are hard to measure, but what you can count are relationships. We know that positive emotions can stimulate the same part of the brain as narcotics, and giving to a charity lights up [those same parts of the brain],” he says. “It doesn’t sound very exciting, but it’s very healthy.” In fact, he says that tending relationships, be it with friends, family, a spouse or a support group, may be the most important thing you can do for your health. “Being nice and generous and funny and kind are more important to people’s health than they realize,” George says. “The earlier you start practicing these things, the better off you are. But it’s certainly never too late to start.” More Love, More Laughter, More Life Other research backs up findings from the Harvard study; Dan Buettner, whose groundbreaking work on longevity led to forming the Blue Zones organization to help Americans live healthier, longer lives, says that longevity walks the same path as happiness. “Health and happiness are inextricably linked,” Dan says. “You cannot pull them apart. Making sure that you have happy friends affects how long you live, because that’s contagious. And focusing on your immediate social network is more important than either diet or exercise programs when it comes to living a long, happy, healthy life.” He says having five positive-minded people who share interests in recreation—whether it’s golf, walking or gardening—and who truly care about you will have powerful incremental effects on your well-being. “That is almost the surest thing you can do in the long run for both making it to a healthy age 90 or 95 and enjoying the journey. [Happiness adds] about eight years to your life expectancy; it’s almost as good for you as quitting smoking.” Perhaps Dan’s greatest evidence of the link between happiness and longevity is much less scientific, though. “After interviewing about 100 centenarians, I can say that I didn’t find a single grump in the bunch,” he says. “That tells me that [happiness] is a really worthwhile pursuit.” Read more: What Can Telomeres Tell Us? Read more: Find Your Blue Zone for a Long and Happy Life Read more: Ikigai: The Secret to a Long, Happy Life Paula Felps is the Science Editor for Live Happy magazine.
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Woman painting walls of her home.

8 Steps to a Happier Home

If you want a blueprint for happiness at home, modern science can help provide it. As environmental psychologists study the effects of physical space on mood and emotions, neuroarchitects—a mashup of neuroscience and design—investigate how our physical surroundings influence brain processes such as stress, emotion and memory. Together, their findings suggest that the purchases we make at Home Depot or Pottery Barn can affect us in ways we never would have imagined. Sitting pretty Consider the matter of buying a chair. Sally Augustin, Ph.D., editor of Research Design Connections, says that psychologists studying the implications of the way we sit found that our posture influences “the rich chemical stew in our brains.” People sitting up straighter have more positive views of themselves than people slouching. Sitting in a way that allows you to take up as much room as possible leads you to feel more powerful and have a higher tolerance for risk. Even padding matters. People perched on hard chairs are much more inflexible during negotiations than those on soft seats. Science also explains why we’re so willing to pay more for a room with a view: It’s good medicine. A 1984 study by psychologist Roger Ulrich found that surgical patients in a Pennsylvania hospital whose windows overlooked a small stand of trees left the hospital a full day sooner, had fewer complications and required less pain medication than patients with views of a brick wall. In 2006, neuroscientist Irving Biederman of the University of Southern California discovered that there’s a part of our brains, the parahippocampal cortex, that responds to sweeping views. Rich in opiate receptors, the site releases endorphins, our feel-good hormones, when we gaze at pleasing vistas. Researchers also say we’re hardwired to respond to nature because our survival as a species depended on careful observation of it. We needed to know how to respond to weather, spot predators, find refuge, farm and hunt when there was sunlight, and sleep when there was none. Roger Ulrich, who did the study of hospital-room views, has said, “When we recognize those elements today, even if we’re highly stressed or sick, our blood pressure lowers, our immune system functions better, and we feel less stressed.” Harvard biologist Edward O. Wilson coined the term “biophilic design” to describe architecture or design that connects us with a living environment. To get a biophilic buzz, we don’t need to let goats graze in our living room. We can stay in touch with the cycle of sunlight—and our own circadian rhythms—by placing sheer curtains on our windows. Or, says Sally, even incorporating visible wood grain into our environment, through hardwood floors or unpainted maple or walnut furniture, will have a calming effect. Happy places Creating what Sally calls a more “place happy” home isn’t rocket science. Or even neuroscience. But it does require us to approach buying, remodeling or decorating tweaks to our home with introspection. Architect Sarah Susanka is the author of Not So Big Solutions for Your Home. Her philosophy is that instead of focusing on square footage and traditional room plans, we think instead about what it takes to create a home that’s an expression of our authentic self. “When our houses reflect who we really are,” she says, “we end up feeling much more at home in our lives.” Sarah says her clients are often uneasy after ceding control to an interior designer. “It’s like walking onto the stage set of somebody else’s home,” she says. “It’s filled with beautiful things but it doesn’t feel like their home because these objects don’t have any meaning to them.” Sarah suggests keeping a place journal for home-improvement projects. Make notes about the places in your life that make you comfortable. Take photos and make diagrams; you might admire the beauty of a soaring greenhouse but feel diminished by the scale of the space. Supplement with pages from your favorite magazines or websites. We've come up with eight ideas to make your home into a truly happy space. Experiment; pick and choose the ones that fit your personality. 1. Use space creatively Make a dining room double as a library by adding bookshelves. Place area rugs beneath furniture arrangements to define areas for reading, conversation and work. 2. Bring in the house plants Greenery helps sharpen focus, boost immunity, clear the air and lift our spirits. For a natural sleep aid, keep potted lavender in your bedroom. According to NASA, plants can remove up to 87 percent of gases like benzene and formaldehyde within 24 hours. 3. Make a breeze Place a plant or mobile near a window or fan for soothing motion. 4. Cultivate smart messiness For all the books on banishing clutter, décor that’s too minimalist can rob us of ways to highlight our values and interests. Decorate with travel mementos, family photos and objects that evoke happy memories. 5. Create a space of your own We all yearn for an area of retreat. This can be a window seat or a corner of a room framed with a folding screen for quiet contemplation. 6. Have a focal point for each room A fireplace, bay window, sculpture or potted palm tree are all good forms of visual punctuation. 7. Move Away from the walls Place furniture in a way that lets people meander around the space, but make sure everyone’s back is protected. Create “symbolic” points of protection with standing lamps and console tables. 8. Arrange seating for conversation Place couches and chairs in a loose circular or horseshoe arrangement. Shelley Levitt is a freelance journalist based in Southern California and an editor at large for Live Happy.
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happy gift books

9 Gift Books to Spark Joy This Holiday Season

A book can be a magical gift. The right book can show someone how well you know them. Share a smile, a laugh or some inspiration this holiday season by gifting a book from our eclectic list of books to suit every taste, from the family foodie to the photography lover. Make your gift book even more personal by including a handwritten notecard or inscription inside. 1. Alton Brown: EveryDayCook by Alton Brown Beloved TV host Alton Brown (best known for his 14 seasons of Good Eats and his role on Iron Chef America) has written a new cookbook that puts easy weeknight meals front and center. Bits of science and food lore—along with photos that he took on his iPhone—accompany the 101 recipes. Look for Alton’s take on American comfort food and plenty of his signature humor threaded throughout. It’s the perfect gift for the family foodie. 2. Cats in Paris: A Magical Coloring Book by Won-Sun Jang This charmant coloring book of intricate pen-and-ink drawings is perfect for the friend or family member who loves to relax with a box of colored pencils but is tired of mesmerizing mandalas. Of course, it will also please the crazed cat lovers in your life. Take a trip through Paris with a gaggle of finely drawn felines—allergenic fur not included. 3. Little Humans by Brandon Stanton A celebration of little humans everywhere. Brandon Stanton, creator of the popular blog, Humans of New York, which has spawned a series of equally popular coffee-table books. Here Brandon has compiled 40 of his favorite photos of kids expressing their individuality. These fun, beautiful and moving images of kids from his website are intended to inspire a sense of community and imbue the reader with the free spirit of childhood. The book makes a perfect gift for a child, parent or child at heart who appreciates the way that children just radiate joy. 4. My Favorite Things by Maira Kalman How do the objects in our lives tell a story? Bestselling author and illustrator Maira Kalman captures the human experience by exploring the significance of the physical things we have in our lives. With artifacts, recollections and selections from the collections of the Cooper-Hewitt, Smithsonian Design Museum and her own personal collections, My Favorite Things features more than 50 special objects to view and ponder. See the pocket watch Abraham Lincoln was carrying when he was shot, original editions of Winnie-the-Pooh and Alice in Wonderland as well as photographs taken by Maira. An ideal gift for the art or design enthusiast. 5. National Parks of America: Experience America's 59 National Parks by Lonely Planet Ideal for the nature lover or travel enthusiast, this book celebrates America’s 59 awe-inspiring national parks. The year 2016 was a big one for the parks; the 100th anniversary of their founding meant renewed interest and a slew of new documentaries and books for all ages. This book highlights the best activities and trails of each park, proposes ideal itineraries, explains how to get there, and even gives advice on where to stay. What’s more, the stunning color photographs will inspire wanderlust and a burning desire to hop in the car and see the magnificent views—of the world’s tallest trees, towering cliffs and snow-covered mountains—for yourself. 6. Queen of Your Own Life by Kathy Kinney and Cindy Ratzlaff Actress Kathy Kinney and comedian Cindy Ratzlaff have created a successful series of fun, fabulous books that feature vintage images and wry, inspiring quotes. The quotes are “queenisms,” and each book invites women to recognize and celebrate themselves as the queens they are. Their latest venture, Queen of Your Own Life, reminds women to take control of their relationships, happiness and destiny. A great gift for any woman who loves the vintage aesthetic and could use a couple positive affirmations once in a while. 7. The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World by Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu The title and author byline pretty much say it all: Two of the world's greatest spiritual leaders—both winners of the Nobel Peace Prize—have come together to collaborate on a book about joy. Written with compassion and humor, The Book of Joy includes personal anecdotes from the two men, teachings about happiness, as well as some of the science behind it. They also offer suggestions of daily practices to increase your own happiness, turning it from a fleeting emotion into an authentic way of living your life. 8. Think Happy: Instant Peptalks to Boost Positivity by Karen Salmansohn Happiness guru and author Karen Salmansohn has collected 50 inner “peptalks” for readers to employ in different situations, as needed, punctuated with adorable color illustrations and watercolors. The situations vary from “trying something new” to more serious perils such as “facing failure.” You can think of this book as a charming and quirky form of cognitive behavioral therapy. The perfect gift for anyone you know who needs to occasionally quiet their inner critic. 9. Zen Dogs by Alexandra Cearns Who can resist this photo collection that captures some very cool canines—just chilling. Award-winning animal photographer Alexandra Cearns celebrates the serenity of dogs by finding them in joyful moments of relaxation. See 80 beautiful color photographs of a variety of breeds from the beloved golden retriever to the unique French bulldog. To emphasize the mindful, Zen feel, the book includes inspirational words of wisdom from the Buddha, Eckhart Tolle, Thich Nhat Hanh and others. A perfect gift for the mellow dog lover in your life. Read more: 10 Life-Changing Books That Will Stay With You Forever Read more: 7 Best Books to Boost Your Brain Health Read more: 10 Must-Read Books for Happy, Healthy Eating Sandra Bienkowski is a regular contributor to Live Happy and the founder and CEO of TheMediaConcierge.net.
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Colleagues exchanging presents at a meeting.

Try These 5 Better Ways to Celebrate at Work

This year when you celebrate the holidays with your colleagues, try putting the focus on experiences instead of gifts. With the five options below, you’ll not only have more fun, but you’ll spend less money, too. A win-win! People derive more satisfaction from experiences than from material goods, according to research by psychologist Thomas Gilovich and his colleagues at Cornell University. Their study found this happens for three reasons: Our identities are more tied in with experiences than with things; when we receive an experience, we don’t tend to compare it to other experiences; and when we enjoy an experience together it reinforces a positive relationship more than when exchanging gifts. 1. Group Adventure Alternative to the Traditional Party The usual: Your boss schedules the traditional holiday party, catered or at a restaurant. How to shake it up: Take a group cooking class. Nothing creates a strong bond like making chocolate éclairs with Delphine in accounting. Bring in a laughter yoga or balloon-making instructor. 2. Experience Gifting Alternative to Secret Santa The usual: The $10 or $20 Secret Santa exchange. How to Shake it up: Make it a “Secret Santa Scavenger Hunt.” Leave clues for a few days for your recipient with a meaningful quote or a book as the last present. Give mini-experiences. Employees visit colleagues’ work spaces on a designated day to receive gifts of fun or knowledge such as the reading of a motivational quote, a lesson about art or yoga, or a game of Nerf basketball. 3. Free and Meaningful Activity Alternative to Overspending The usual: An overpriced company dinner out at a restaurant. How to shake it up: Arrange for a taco truck to come to the office for lunch and let everyone go wild trying out new combinations. Volunteer as a team at a local soup kitchen or food distribution center. 4. Socially Responsible Shopping Experience Alternative to Buying for People Who Need Nothing The usual: You buy an expensive gift for your boss, even though she’s the proverbial woman who has everything. How to shake it up: Shop for a family in need. Your local fire department, shelter or religious institution will collect and distribute your gifts. Organize a “field trip” with your team to your local toy or discount store and have a blast picking out items. Savor how good it feels to give to others. 5. Positive procrastination Alternative to Squeezing in One More Thing Before the Holidays The usual: The holidays can be a crazy time of year with parties, decorating, shopping, school events and other commitments. Sometimes another evening out can feel overwhelming. How to shake it up: Agree with your co-workers to celebrate the holidays in January, taking extra stress off everyone’s shoulders. Give your team something to look forward to that will re-energize everyone after the New Year. MARGARET H. GREENBERG and SENIA MAYMIN, Ph.D., are sought-after executive coaches, speakers and positive psychology practitioners, and the authors of the book Profit From the Positive. Find more information about their coaching and certificate programs at ProfitFromthePositive.com.
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Very happy, beautiful woman

Srikumar Rao Wants You to Feel Radiantly Alive

When Srikumar Rao was growing up in India and later in Myanmar, he chafed against his mother’s penchant for finding the silver lining in any situation. “She was very spiritual and had a very upbeat outlook on life,” Srikumar says. Whenever anything bad happened, Jaya Rao would give thanks that it wasn’t a lot worse. “It used to really irritate me,” Srikumar admits. That irritation persisted into adulthood. While attending Delhi University, Srikumar had an accident during a particularly fierce game of squash. Running at top speed to return a tough alley shot, he barreled into a wall head first. His glasses broke, the frame piercing his skin. He crumpled to the ground unconscious. Making matters worse, it was his birthday. Jaya gave the events her usual sunny spin. She was so grateful, she told her son, that he’d been with someone who was able to take him to the emergency room. And how lucky he was, she continued, that the steel eyeglass frame had merely inflicted a flesh wound instead of gouging out his eyeball. Bedrock optimism Decades later Srikumar would come to see the wisdom in what he calls his mother’s “bedrock optimism” and her faith in the benevolence of the universe. “I must have stored it somewhere,” he says. “What she was saying all those years suddenly made sense, and not just intellectually, but at a very deep level.” By then Srikumar was in his early 40s, teaching at Long Island University after he’d come to the United States to pursue his Ph.D. in marketing from Columbia University. At the time, he says, he felt burnt out and plagued by “gnawing insecurities, worries, anxiety, jealousies, irritations, guilt and apprehensions.” He began to cull insights from a lifetime of voracious reading, everything from ancient religious texts to the 1971 best-seller Be Here Now by new-age guru Ram Dass. He pored over philosophy texts, spiritual biographies and volumes by big thinkers in leadership, mindfulness and flow. For good measure, he read the novels of the British humorist P.G. Wodehouse. Pulling together these disparate threads, he developed a syllabus for a course with the ambitious goal of assisting people in transforming their lives—helping them to align their work with their interests and values, move toward optimism and warmer relationships and reconnect with their spirituality. “It was the course I needed for myself,” Srikumar says. Charting a course He wasn’t alone. Since 1994, thousands of people have taken the program Srikumar would come to call “Creativity and Personal Mastery,” or CPM for short. After teaching CPM at Long Island University and then Columbia University, he began offering it privately through The Rao Institute, largely to business executives and entrepreneurs. The exclusive course takes place over three highly intensive and interactive weekends and costs thousands of dollars. Now, at 65, Srikumar says he is eager for his work to reach a larger audience. “The reason I do what I do is I want everybody to get up in the morning and say, ‘Yippee!’ ” Inspiring those yelps was his motivation for recently self-publishing a paperback version (with an updated bibliography) of his book Are You Ready to Succeed? Unconventional Strategies for Achieving Personal Mastery in Business and Life, which originally came out in 2005. Your life did not just happen,” Srikumar says. “You experience life exactly as you have fashioned it. If you are unhappy with where you are, you can deconstruct the parts you don’t like and build them up again.” What keeps us from feeling “radiantly alive,” Srikumar says, is that we have spent our entire lives learning to be unhappy. Tripping us up are what he calls “mental models,” a jumble of fixed ideas about how the world works and how things should or shouldn’t be done that don’t serve us well. The book guides readers through a series of exercises that will help them become the architect of a life brimming with joy and fulfillment. Here are three exercises to kickstart your transformation: 1. Try out an alternate reality Divide a page into four columns headed “family,” “work,” “love” and “self.” For the next 10 minutes, without stopping, scribble down the first beliefs that come to mind under each of these areas. They can be anything at all. For example, “My boss always belittles my ideas” or “I’m too old to find love” or “I could never get hired for the kind of job I want.” Now, looking over your list, choose a situation troubling you right now; perhaps it’s working for your supercritical boss. Develop an alternate reality you can plausibly believe. You might not be able to accept that your boss is trying to encourage you to sharpen your ideas. But maybe you can be open to the possibility that having a difficult boss will give you the skills you need to excel in a competitive field. Over the next week, live as if the alternate universe you have created were real. Write down every piece of evidence that supports this parallel world. You might describe how your boss scoffed at something you said in a meeting and how you rose to defend your point of view. The payoff: In your alternate universe, you do not hand over your ability to be happy to someone else. Instead, you retain the power to focus on what’s important to you and you appreciate the strengths and resilience you gain from challenges. “As you live in one of these realities that you select,” Srikumar writes, “you will initially feel as though you are playacting. As you persist, that feeling of faking it will go away and it will actually become your new reality.” Read more: Are You Sabotaging Your Self-Esteem? 2. Swap the voice of judgment for a detached witness Devote two weeks to becoming aware of your “voice of judgment.” Srikumar says that this voice is one of the most common and pernicious types of “mental chatter” that plays in the backgrounds of our minds. The voice of judgment “does a darn good job of  flattening you,” Srikumar says. Sometimes it puts you down directly: “You’re going to really mess up this project and be exposed as the big fraud you are!” Other times, it compares you unfavorably to someone else: “Carol is so quick on her feet; if you’d been asked that question in the meeting, you would have been tongue-tied and stammering.” Start observing your voice of judgment. It can be helpful to set your smartphone to beep every hour as a reminder to jot down your observations. Pay attention to how often you berate yourself and the impact this has on your ability to stick with a difficult task or stay engaged with other people. Don’t beat yourself up as you notice the negativity of your thinking; that will only increase the volume of the voice of judgment. The payoff: Your observing self is what Srikumar (and many teachers of mindfulness and meditation) calls “the witness.” Making friends with this dispassionate spectator shows you with clarity the many ways in which you undermine yourself. As you gain practice in cultivating your witness—and it’s a lifetime quest—you’ll be able to move through your days with much greater mindfulness and confidence. Read more: Give Yourself a Mindfulness Makeover 3. Invest in actions rather than outcomes Remember a moment when you experienced such extraordinary beauty that it took you outside yourself and to a place of great serenity. Perhaps it was a sunset. You didn’t say, “That’s a beautiful sunset, but it’s kind of off-center and if I could move it 200 yards to the right and Photoshop out some of the clouds, it would be so much more beautiful.” No, the off-center sunset was just fine. And in that rare moment of accepting the universe just as it was, Srikumar says, your innately happy nature bubbled up. Srikumar’s many years of study and of teaching have convinced him that our inborn nature is firmly tilted toward joy. Try to bring this mindset of acceptance to your daily life. It won’t be easy. For most of us, our default attitude on happiness is based on the “if-then” model: “If I get that big raise/have a second baby/spend a month in Bali, then I’ll be happy.” There are lots of problems with this way of thinking. For one thing, we’re pretty bad at predicting what will actually bring us happiness, as Harvard psychologist and researcher Daniel Gilbert, Ph.D., showed us in his book Stumbling on Happiness. For another, we can’t control outcomes. A better strategy: Let the goal you seek give you direction, but invest yourself completely in the process. That means do the best you’re capable of, without worrying about the end result, and embrace where the journey takes you. The payoff: You move through life with a greater sense of tranquility and purpose. “If you succeed in achieving your outcome, wonderful,” Srikumar says. “And if you don’t succeed, still wonderful, because now you have a new starting point, and from that new starting point, you select another outcome and keep going. And when you do that, you will find that every day is a blast.” Jaya Rao would approve. Listen to our Podcast with Srikumar Rao about How to Stop Negative Mental Chatter Shelley Levitt is a freelance writer based in Southern California, and an editor at large for Live Happy magazine.
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