Feeling tired and stressed. Frustrated young woman keeping eyes closed and massaging nose while sitting at her working place in office

5 Ways to Break Your Achiever Fever

Nothing explained my misery: I was five years into running my successful market research business, I had Fortune 500 clients, loyal employees, and was growing an average of 20% each year. I should have been happy given everything I had accomplished, but aside from short bursts of excitement from achieving goals, I just couldn’t find any sustainable joy. This had been the story of my life, whether it be sports, school or my career—I was forever striving for the next thing, the next goal, the next achievement. I’ll be happy when…I used to think. But the happiness never seemed to arrive, no matter what I accomplished. I was sick and tired of living my life this way and my insomnia had gotten so bad I knew something had to change, otherwise I risked becoming a liability to my own company. Four years later, after extensive coaching, self-reflection, meditation, reading, journaling and various retreats, I now understand that I had been suffering from a sickness that I now call Achiever Fever. Achiever Fever is the dark side of achieving—it’s the delusional state of mind we get ourselves into when we tie our self-worth and happiness to our accomplishments. Symptoms include: a constant need to prove oneself, frequent worry, an inability to stay present, comparison with others, fear of not living up to one’s potential and the over-use of food, alcohol, exercise, sleep or work to distract ourselves from our stress. However, as I have come to learn, there is a cure. The cure does not diminish our abilities to achieve: in fact, it only enhances them. But just as importantly, the cure allows us to discover the joy and peace that is already in us to begin with. If you think you might be suffering, here are five ways to break your fever: 1. The first, and in many ways most important step, is to recognize that you are feverish. Achievers tend to operate at a heightened level of busyness that keeps us focused on the external world. Our inner selves get ignored, our self-awareness decreases and we suffer in silence as a result. The suffering can only be dealt with when we acknowledge there is a sickness. 2. The next step, just like with any addiction (and many of us are addicted to achieving), is to tell someone you are suffering. This requires vulnerability and courage. Rest assured that most achievers are suffering from the fever, but most are too anxious to talk about it for fear of seeming weak. Owning it and naming it are critical. 3. Now it is time to get to know the voice in your head – the inner critic that natters away at you, the one that tells you are not good enough, smart enough, strong enough, caring enough or trying hard enough. We allow this voice to run our lives, keeping us in a state of self-doubt and feeling like we can’t get out of own way. This voice can be disrupted by questioning these irrational stories we tell ourselves. Do not accept the voice as truth. There are several systems of self-inquiry, such as Byron Katie’s The Work, that can transform our thinking and take away our fever. I speak more about this in my book, as well, The Achiever Fever Cure. 4. The only way we can truly experience joy is by being present, something that is difficult for future-focused achievers. Incorporating meditation into your life, even if it is only five minutes of deep breathing a day, will show you what it feels like to be present. You will be able to watch your inner critic at work and strengthen your self-awareness, both key in curing your achiever fever. 5. The ultimate cure for achiever fever is to learn to let go. This does not mean giving up, but rather giving in to the flow of life. Achievers like to be “in control” but all we are really able to control is our reactions to what comes our way. Our unhappiness comes when try to twist our life, and the people in it, to suit what we would like to happen. Instead, set an intention, create a plan, rest assured your work ethic will kick in and get out of the way. Remember that challenges bring gifts. Keeping Achiever Fever at bay is a daily practice. Just like we exercise our external selves, we need to pay attention to our internal selves. As we become more self-aware and more present, joy flows into our lives allowing us to feel more connected to ourselves and to others. It is in this state that we can flourish, accomplishing what we never thought possible, as our self-doubt and irrational thoughts fall away.
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Recording artist Jason Mraz performs in concert at NBC's 'Today Show'

Jason Mraz Says Yes

When Jason Mraz broke onto the national scene in 2002, he arrived without a disguise. Below the tilted trucker cap on top of his head and above the fuzzy bunny slippers on his feet was a confirmed optimist, upbeat and positive. Bouncing on his toes, he sang one of the earwormiest hits of the new century. “If you’ve gots the poison I’ve gots the remedy, the remedy is the experience,’’ he sang in “The Remedy (I Won’t Worry).” Maybe we weren’t sure exactly what that meant, but we didn’t press the pause button to ponder; instead, we threw back our heads and joined Jason as he pronounced his cheerful credo “I won’t worry my life away.’’ Only after a while did we absorb that the song had a darker edge, that it was written in response to the news that his best friend from high school had been diagnosed with a rare bone cancer. For just a moment in the song, Jason shakes his fist at the heavens (“Who says you deserve this? And what kind of god would serve this?’’) Older, but never jaded But the singer is not the type to invest much in pointless anger or self-pity. The answer to the bad deals in life is to change your point of view, he says. Or, again from “The Remedy”: “You can turn off the sun, but I’m still gonna shine.’’ Almost a decade and a half later, the artist, now 38, is older, more mature, wiser. He bounces less, the bunny slippers have been retired, the trucker cap has been mostly traded in for a hipster’s pork pie, but otherwise, the person is not fundamentally different. Jason is no longer a coffee house ingénue, but says he remains convinced that life is what you make it, and the capacity to make it great resides within each of us. “I try to be happy,’’ he says, “but even if I’m not, I choose to have an optimistic outlook on life.’’ This outlook, this choice, infuses every element of his life, from his music to his interests to his feelings of responsibility as a member of the human race. “The future depends on how I set it up in the present,’’ he says . “I try to live optimistically to live out the best life I can.” I try to be happy,’’ he says, “but even if I’m not, I choose to have an optimistic outlook on life.’’ Jason says he is a great believer in the power of “saying ‘yes,’ ” in treating life’s opportunities with enthusiasm. “Yes is the key that unlocks potential,” he says. “It really is the key to creativity, and that creativity doesn’t happen if you say ‘no.’ If you’re in a theater and you’re improvising with someone, and you say ‘no,’ that’s the end of the scene!” Saying ‘yes’ is a concept so significant for Jason that he made Yes! the title of his fifth and most recent album, on which he collaborated with the all-female band Raining Jane. “The way I see it,” he says, “If Raining Jane hadn’t said ‘yes’ when I asked them to collaborate, this album would not have happened. If the label hadn’t said ‘yes,’ this album would not have happened. I see yes as the key that unlocks opportunity.” Jason's positive message Jason’s optimism is the hallmark of his brand, one of the most consistent there is in popular music. Such contemporaries as John Mayer and Ed Sheeran mix songs about love’s ecstasies and miseries in equal measure. That’s not Jason’s bag. “My albums are themed to be upbeat and inspiring,’’ he says. “I want to uplift, inspire, and make people dance.’’ One only has to look at hits like “Love Someone,” “You and I Both,” and the irresistibly catchy ”I’m Yours” (“my happy little hippie song,’’ he calls it) to see that this is an artist whose message, music and audience are perfectly in sync. These chart-busting tunes result from a disciplined gleaning process; Jason once estimated that to get the dozen songs that appear on an album, he will write 80. “The ones that don’t make it are either too cheesy or superdark and depressing,’’ he has said, “and I don’t want to subject the audience to either one.’’ From time to time, something melancholy slips through, but even then, as in a song like “I Won’t Give Up,” he manages to turn a song about a relationship that isn’t working into a testament to everlasting romantic devotion. “I’m inclined to sing songs that I need, that light my spirit,’’ he says. “In turn, that gives fans what they want.’’ Now always on the sunny side For Jason, music ameliorates whatever pains and disappointments he may encounter. “I wake up grumpy,” he admits in a surprising confession. But “I write many songs to fill the love I may not have experienced when I was a kid or the love I’m not experiencing now.’’ Divorced from wife Sheridan in 2004, Jason split with fiancee Tristan Prettyman, a singer, in 2011. “This world may seem unfair at times,’’ he says, “but we have the ability to dream, and that helps.’’ Among other things that Jason finds helpful is yoga. Like most everyone, reading the newspaper can get him pretty bummed. “It’s hard to stay completely positive when there is suffering in the world that all humans have to endure,’’ he says. “But I use music and mantras to transform my thoughts from the negative to the positive. If the world seems like a terrible place, I can transform my feelings by thinking or saying, ‘I won’t give up,’ ‘I won’t worry my life away’ and ‘I won’t hesitate no more.’ That is, I believe, what makes me a positive person. Through meditation and yoga, I can move energy through my body and ease any relentless thoughts I have, allowing me to focus and concentrate my attention where I need it to be.’’ Increasingly, that attention is directed to the broader world, how he fits into it, and how he can change it. Getting down to earth There’s no telling how many farmers aspire to be international pop stars—more than a handful, we’re guessing—but Jason is that rare international pop star who wishes he could spend more time in the dirt. “I love spending time at my farm,’’ he says, “but it can be a problem because I’m out on the land sometimes until midnight.’’ Jason owns a 5.5-acre farm north of San Diego, where the self-described “organic gardening geek’’ raises chickens, keeps bees, and grows corn, peppers, leafy greens and most especially avocados. He is serious about his crops, not only because in one recent year he sold 34,000 pounds of avocados to local Chipotle stores—also because they provide a large percentage of his vegetarian diet. (He began changing his diet in 2006, when he opened for The Rolling Stones at a few concerts. Until then a smoker and confirmed junk food devotee, Jason saw how the aging rockers took care of themselves, and adopted their program.) The urban farmer Jason is enthusiastic about his agrarian accomplishments. Writing recently on his website, he encouraged his visitors to become urban farmers, if possible. “It’s about making the most out of a small piece of land,’’ he wrote, heaping praise onto the educational website UrbanFarm.org. “It’s about declaring your yard, your courtyard or windowsill an actual farm. And then working with the seasons, the sunlight, and local resources like discarded materials and water runoff to bring it to life as conveniently and cheaply as possible. It’s the foundation for the idea ‘Think globally, act locally.’ ’’ Is it any surprise that Jason sells packets of seeds at his concerts? A big part of his positive message is expressed through activism and philanthropy. Some of his efforts take the form of broad, dramatic gestures, like the concerts against human trafficking that he played in the Philippines and Myanmar. Other efforts are local and specific. “On my last tour, I chose to make the venues smaller and play more nights in each market. We set up community-based events and awarded grants in a lot of those markets. More broadly, we partner with several organizations and focus on equality, the environment, and healthy living and eating.’’ What's next “I’m just ready for a break,’’ he has said, noting that the long tours make performing “feel like a corporate job sometimes.’’ At the same time, it’s hard to see how an artist whose music invigorates the spirit not only of his audience but his own as well could leave that behind. But whatever path Jason chooses, it’s all but certain to lead to something interesting and uplifting. “I love to write music and be in the studio,’’ he says, “but there is creativity in everything we do, and it should be nurtured.’’ (From the October 2015 issue of Live Happy magazine.)
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stack of zen stones on pebble beach

5 Things You Need to Know About Mindfulness

We all could use a break from time to time. Creating good habits, like being more mindful, can help keep stress from over taking your life. Here are five things you should know when it comes to practicing mindfulness. We’re talking about practice. We will never get good at anything without practice. Experts recommend finding ten minutes for mindfulness throughout the day, preferably in the morning. Set a timer or alert on your phone to help you create and maintain the habit. Mindfulness guru Jon Kabat-Zinn says, “If you can learn how to live in this present moment, then mindfulness doesn’t take any time at all. You’re moving through life, surfing on your breath and handling whatever comes up as you need to.” It’s not voodoo. Mindfulness practices and meditation have roots in many cultures dating back thousands of years. This may make some people thing that there is some sort of mysticism involved, but mindfulness is a natural process that allows to focus on your present awareness. You can practice mindfulness by washing the dishes or walking your dog. As long you are focused on the moment and don’t let yesterday or tomorrow creep in, you are where you need to be. Need Help? That’s easy. Andy Puddicombe’s leading meditation app Headspace, has proven to be a leader in teaching mindfulness. Andy’s easy-going attitude and soothing voice guide you through the journey of your inner you. The first 10 sessions are free. If you like what you hear (and feel), a monthly subscription opens a whole new world of meditations designed for specific areas in your life, including stress and anxiety. The time is now. If your life is busy and you aren’t sure about a when is a good time to start your practicing mindfulness, how about now? Jack Kornfield, author of No Time Like the Present and one of people responsible for introducing mindfulness to Western culture, says there is no time better than the present to start your mindfulness journey. Being mindful can open the door to getting more joy and fulfillment out of your life. Build a Better Brain. Practicing mindfulness on a regular basis can strengthen parts of your brain designed for empathy and self-awareness, according to Rick Hanson, Ph.D., author of Just One Thing and Hardwiring Happiness. Being mindful can thicken the brain’s cortical layers that help us focus and activate the left prefrontal cortex that keeps our negativity in check.
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Live Happy Dog Trainer Shares Tips

Adopt a New Best Friend This Month

Having a dog as a friend can be a fun and meaningful way to add more happiness in life. According to the journal Scientific Reports, having a dog around can reduce our risk of cardiovascular disease by keeping us company in times of loneliness and nudging us to be more active. Jeff Franklin, one of the world’s leading dog trainers and subject of the new book Franklin: The Man Behind the United States Commando Dogs by Matthew Duffy, says dogs can be the “most nonjudgmental, loving and loyal creatures on the planet. We all want more of those qualities in our lives.” For dogs, being a member of a loving home keeps their tails wagging. Unfortunately, millions of good dogs are living in shelters waiting for that forever home. Jeff explains that many dogs end up in shelters because people underestimate the responsibility of being a dog owner. “Our shelters would become fairly empty if dog owners realized the amount of time it takes to work with a new dog to integrate them into their new ‘human’ type of life and requirements,” he says. “We have worked with shelters and their dogs for over 20 years and the number one reason for dogs being there is because they simply do not have the life skills they need to be the assets they are capable of being in our lives, such as house breaking, not pulling on the leash, not jumping, not barking, destructive chewing, etc.” Every October, the ASPCA celebrates Adopt a Shelter Dog Month, to raise awareness about the importance of adopting a shelter dog. If you are thinking about adding a new four-legged friend to your household, Jeff offers his tips for finding the right pet for you. What should we look for in a shelter dog?  The best thing to do is to look for a dog that generally fits into your lifestyle. If you are picking a shelter dog because they are cute, or sad, or you feel sorry for them, it may not be the correct fit. If you’re busy and social, pick a dog that likes that as well.  If you’re more of a homebody that prefers to stay indoors, then pick the hangout kind of dog. There are many personalities of great dogs that need homes of all types. What are the benefits of caring for/adopting a senior dog? I believe this is a great unselfish act to do. Sure, we all go to shelters and run straight for the adorable puppies, because baby animals leave an impression on us. For me, I have given a home to several senior dogs and the experience was incredibly rewarding on multiple levels. Of course, the down side is that they were only with me a few years, but having the pleasure to give them a great home environment for their last years was priceless…not to mention so much easier than a feisty puppy. What is a training tip you can share with us? Teach your dogs to behave, have good manners and life skills.  Commands (sit, down, stay) are good, but overrated compared to just having a well-behaved canine friend. Dogs that behave well usually spend a substantial amount more time with their owners on a regular basis—not to mention the fact that these dogs do not usually end up in shelters. Make your dog an asset by great training at the beginning of your relationship together and you will always have a faithful companion to care for and spend time with. Where did your ability to communicate with dogs come from? It sounds cliché, but it is just a natural gift. I can teach people how to work with animals, but truly reading and communicating is a naturally given trait that can be enhanced with experience. I’ve been lucky to spend most of my life working with dogs and this has given me invaluable insight into how they think and behave.  What’s most satisfying to you about your work with dogs? I am most satisfied when I work with a canine family or K9 team and the results are a happy dog and happy handlers that perform well at whatever their desired task is—whether it be a family pet, a service dog or a working dog.
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Businessman in classic suit is touching his temples while concentrating

Concentration is Meditation

When we are grounded in awareness of breathing, we’re establishing a base for a single-pointed concentration that is, itself, meditation. Mindful concentration frees us from playing out mere concepts about our life, so we can live life fully as it is here and now. We’re also reminded that machines multitask well, but people don’t. We read while we eat (double the consumption). But each act involves separate bodily systems. Jammed together, neither reading nor eating gets done efficiently. Even if we’re only eating, we rarely chew a single mouthful. Instead we’re forking in the next bite before we’ve even swallowed the first. One-pointed concentration means that if we’re eating an orange, we do so one slice at a time. Communing with the whole universe in the orange, slice by slice. So why not treat our breathing (and everything else) the same way? Concentration, in and of itself, can awaken us. Given prolonged attention to breath, a shift in our psychic base can occur. Everything’s no longer all about me: my likes, my dislikes, my possessions, my résumé. We can leave that stark, simplistic, abstract, fantasy realm, always dominated by our desires—and aversions, which are only the flipside of the same self-absorption—to discover reality, rich in nuance, subtlety, texture, ever-changing like music. This shift in awareness can be a gradual awakening, over time, but you might mark how it can happen spontaneously in the space of just a smile…a pause…a breath. And the more we enjoy this fundamental shift of attention, the more readily we might choose it.
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Surfing dog in life jacket

Find the Good: Keep the Recharge Button at the Ready

As we ride the final wave of summer into early fall, join me in appreciating the grit and joie de vivre of San Diego’s Jojo, a surfing corgi who recovered from a brutal, nearly fatal dog attack through water therapy and taking up surfing with his person, Josephine Zosa. Jojo has his own Instagram account @supercorgi_jojo with more than 82,000 followers and growing. He’s entered—and even won—surf competitions and gives back by volunteering as a therapy dog for the military and in hospitals and nursing homes. Jojo is one more example of how trauma can bring out our greatest strengths. It’s Time to Put You on the To-Do List So what do you do when the day’s challenges start to get you down? (Other than watching corgi videos, that is?) At my house, we’re all coming off simpler summer schedules, sending the kids back to school and trying to get everyone charged up for the action-packed fall routine. It’s the ideal time for a reminder to take care of ourselves as the calendar fills up with meetings; holiday planning; soccer and basketball practice or Scouts meetings for the kids. In the morning rush it may seem easier to skip that 3-mile run to get everything done on time, but don’t forget, taking care of yourself not only brings good things to you but also to the rest of your family. I’m not perfect at taking care of myself, either. Yet there is a certain element of prioritizing—building into your schedule—the things that make your life worthwhile, like exercising regularly, not always eating on the go and savoring moments of quiet where you can find them. Getting the kids to bed on time can help with that last one. But there are bigger things you can plan for, too. We just got back from a huge vacation; we went on a cruise to Alaska for a week. It was important to do that because for me, if I don’t check out enough, it’s really hard to maintain that intensity that’s required to do my regular job the rest of the year. To work, to be involved in my community, to get my kids from place to place, I need that recharge button. And I find so much more good in recognizing that! For one, my kids saw me in a more relaxed mode that opened up more opportunities to connect and just have fun. We were still active, running, biking and sightseeing, but it was important that I was engaged with them and not on my phone or computer. I think most people overlook the good in taking a break. The benefit is in hitting the reset button so I can give work my all when I get back. It helps me look at the “must do’s” in a much more positive light, because I took the time to take care of myself. Because I’m never going to get to the bottom of my to-do list…I promise. How many times have you heard “work hard, play hard?” But who really does?…I don’t see that many people actually incorporate it. You have to make play as much of a priority as the work. The Boss Says…Take Your Vacation! There are so many people who leave their vacation days unused. In my own company as CEO, I stand up and say, “Schedule your vacation; I’ve already scheduled mine,” and I mean it. People kind of look at me like, “What’s the catch?” This Travel+Leisure article cites an Allianz Travel Insurance study that reports 51 percent of the population—or about 129 million people—say they’ve gone a full year without taking a vacation. And the number of people who said they were confident they would take a vacation within the year—48 percent—is at the lowest rate it’s been since 2010. So take the time, take a vacation. More importantly, those weeks you’re not on vacation? Take time to take care of yourself because if you don’t, you’re no good for anybody. The good that you’ll bring to the world is worth it. Be a Happy Activist Our September #HappyAct is setting a positive goal for yourself. Try running for 30 minutes straight, cooking more meals at home, taking a mental health day or anything that builds you up to better handle life’s challenges. A sense of accomplishment will boost your joy, connection with others and overall well-being. On the #HappyAct front, this was one of my favorite recent kindhearted acts: A Louisiana grocery store clerk, Jordan Taylor, let autistic teen Jack Ryan help him stock a cooler with orange juice for more than half an hour after Jack showed an interest in helping. The story gets even better with a GoFundMe campaign to help Jordan raise money for college. Keep looking for the good, and you’ll find it!
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A person looking out to the mountains

Get Mentally Fit With Grit

Welcome, Happy Activists! A Happy Activist is someone who, through kind words and intentional positive actions, strives to make the world a better place. Live Happy invites you to join our #HappyActs movement! On the 20th of each month, we encourage everyone to incorporate kindness into your daily lives by participating in each month’s planned activity. The more who join the #HappyActs movement, the more positive impact we'll all have on our homes, workplaces and communities. What you think and do matters! September’s theme is resilience. The ability to bounce back after a setback through grit and determination can help us achieve our goals. This sense of accomplishment can increase joy, connection and well-being. It’s important to understand the “why” of goal setting for it to be successful, says strategist Jan Stanley. “The thing that encourages us to set goals is that we see some gap in our lives,” Jan says. The first key is making sure your goals and values align and then to make step-by-step implementation of that goal part of your daily routine. Following that advice, our September 20 Happy Act is to set a positive goal for yourself, whether it’s preparing for a 5K race or half-marathon, taking on a new challenge at work or finishing that house project that’s been dragging on for months. Meet our Happy Activist of the month, Chris Libby, Live Happy’s magazine and digital editor. “Realizing that the power to achieve is within my control is empowering, something I hope you will realize as well as you set out on your own goal-setting journey,” Chris says. 3 Habits to Boost Resilience According to authors Michaela Haas (Bouncing Forward: Transforming Bad Breaks into Breakthroughs) and Jim Rendon (Upside: The New Science of Post-Traumatic Growth), these three daily habits can help you cultivate courage and resilience in the face of adversity. Meditate Spend 12 minutes every morning and every eveningmeditating. Meditation, Michaela says, trains us in regulating stress and calming fear, the very skills we need to confront and recover from adversity. Appreciate Cultivate apractice of gratitudeand appreciation. Every day, write down three things you are grateful for; jot down the first three things that come to mind. If your default position is to focus on the gifts in your life, you’ll find it easier to keep your spirits uplifted and move on to what needs to be done. Connect Research shows thatconnection with other peopleis a key predictor of growth after a traumatic event, Jim says. Even online communities help trauma survivors of all kinds feel more optimistic, confident and empowered. Additional Resources: Angela Duckworth GoodThink Tom Rath Caroline Adams Miller, MAPP Greater Good Science Center Plasticity Labs
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Journal surrounded by school supplies

Kindness Sticks

Welcome, Happy Activists! A Happy Activist is someone who, through kind words and intentional actions, strives to make the world a better place. Live Happy invites you to join our #HappyActs movement! On the 20th of each month, we encourage everyone to incorporate kindness into your daily lives by participating in each month’s planned activity. The more who join the #HappyActs movement, the more positive impact we'll all have on our homes, workplaces and communities. What you think and do matters! August’s theme—just in time for the back-to-school season—is education. For students of all levels, learning character strengths and mental and physical well-being alongside the academic basics ensures both greater achievement and long-term happiness. And for adults, scientists confirm that lifelong learning is associated with greater life satisfaction and a sense of optimism and engagement. Our August 20 Happy Act is to post encouraging and positive notes at school; try our school-themed sticky notes to get things started! Meet our Happy Activist of the month, Kathleen Desloges, a music, drama and dance teacher in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. “I get to work with hundreds of students in a week, and every day we start our classes with a conversation about gratitude, happiness or kindness,” she says. “It’s fun to show up with a purpose!” 3 Steps on How to Prepare for a Happy Act: Researchwhat charitable opportunities are near you. Contactthe organization and discuss how you can help. Plana time to go volunteer and/or determine what you can donate. Learn more: Lifelong Education Delivers Confidence, Joy and Hope. If we’re not learning, we’re not growing. According to the VIA Institute on Character, adults who are learning something new—by taking a class, pursuing a hobby or reading every day—report less stress and greater feelings of hope and purpose. Never Stop Learning. Try these three strategies from Ryan Niemiec, Psy.D., of the Via Institute on Character, to boost your learning mindset and start to see challenges as opportunities. Character and Well-Being. British schoolmaster Sir Anthony Seldon says positive education “isn’t a case of either teaching for tests or teaching for personal growth and happiness; if you teach for happiness and growth and character, you’ll get better exam results because you’ll be developing their intrinsic motivations rather than extrinsic motivations.” 4 Ideas Shaping the Future of Education. Learning to develop grit and character; considering the role of parents; emphasizing what’s going well and focusing on problem-solving over negative characterizations are driving conversations about positive education. The Strength Switch With Lea Waters. Listen to our Live Happy Now podcast with Lea Waters, Ph.D., to learn about the benefits of strength-based parenting and two easy ways to start implementing it. Learning How to Learn Barbara Oakley, Ph.D., the Ramón y Cajal Distinguished Scholar of Global Digital Learning at McMaster University, professor of engineering at Oakland University and author of several books, including A Mind for Numbers and Mindshift, teaches an online course called “Learning How to Learn.” Ready to grow? Start with these guidelines: Think of learning as a lifestyle. Create your own process for acquiring knowledge and skills and ask questions. Work with your brain, not against it. When learning new things, give your brain time so new neural connections can be made. Rethink failure. Encountering difficulty and failure encourages brain plasticity. Be prepared to feel like an impostor, then get over it. Mastery is not a static end state, but a high level of ability to find ways to refine one’s knowledge and skills. Challenge yourself to ask, “What are you learning that keeps you inspired and hungry for more?” Additional Resources: International Positive Education Network Donors Choose Plasticity’s Hero Generation The Strength Switch Via Institute on Character Champlain College Tecmilenio University
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Kirobo Mini can fit in the palm of your hand.

Driving Happiness

While Knight Industries Two Thousand (KITT) may have been ahead of its time, car companies are turning to neuroscience and artificial intelligence technology to boost your positive emotions behind the wheel and beyond. Recently, Toyota Motor Corporation unveiled a palm-size companion robot to keep you company on and off the road. The Kirobo Mini, which is now available in Japan, is designed to read human emotions—like delight, pleasure, surprise or anger—from our facial expressions. Kirobo Mini will ask if you are sad or comment that you look happy today. If we drive too fast, it may tell us to slow down. Kirobo, which is the Japanese word for hope, eventually adapts to your personality and remembers conversations. According to Toyota, more than 5,000 Kirobo Minis have been sold, and the reception to these cuddly bots has been positive. Some have even accepted Kirobo Mini as part of the family. “We did receive some feedback that Kirobo Mini encouraged and increased conversation between couples who gradually had less conversation after their children had grown up and left home,” according to a spokesperson with Toyota. Researchers at Ford are also trying to enhance the driving experience by tapping in to our emotions. In a recent study, Ford teamed up with neuroscience and bio-emotion research company Sensum to see how driving compared to other peak excitement activities. Researchers found that participants driving in a Ford Focus RS loaded with artificial Intelligence emotion reading technology had 2.1 buzz moments during a typical commute. Only a ride on a roller coaster gave more moments of intense excitement. The 2018 Ford Mustang V8 GT. Photo courtesy of Ford Motor Company. Emma Bergg of Ford Public Affairs says the driver-state research at the Ford Research and Innovation Center in Aachen, Germany, is paving the way for smarter and safer cars. Working with EU-funded projects to bridge the gap between human interaction and autonomous driving, researchers at Ford hope to build in-car systems designed to detect our emotions, notice when our stress levels are too high or when we are too tired to drive. Our cars may even take control and save us from dangerous situations. Michael Knight would be proud. Ford’s “Buzz”-worthy Moments Number of times people hit peak levels of excitement: 3.0 On a roller coaster 2.1 Driving a performance car on a typical commute 1.7 On a shopping trip 1.5 Watching Game of Thrones or sports on TV 0 Salsa dancing, fine dining or a passionate kiss
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dad and son reading books

Gifts for Book-Loving Dads

With Father’s Day just around the corner, allow us to do the book shopping for you. There are so many joyful and innovative new titles out there, so ditch the golf gear and head to your local bookstore for this year’s gift. We promise he will love each and every one of these! 1. Dad’s cooking? Why not make something with tater tots? Tots! 50 Tot-ally Awesome Recipes from Totchos to Sweet Po-Tot-O Pie by Dan Whalen A tater tot themed cookbook? Count your dad in. Filled with great ideas like Tots Poutine and Mac ‘n’ Tot ‘n’ Cheese, no one in the family will object to anything dad creates using Dan’s guidance. Most of the recipes use frozen store-bought tots, but if the dad in your life is comfy in the kitchen, no worries. Tots! also includes directions for making these favorite frozen potato treats from scratch. 2. Hard lessons learned are often the most important ones. The $20,000 T-Shirt: Life Lessons (and Fart Stories) from the Greatest Father the World Has Ever Known by Devon Weaver When Devon writes that this book was originally meant to be an advice book for his daughter and son because his relationship with his own father was fraught, it’s impossible to stop your eyes from welling up. Keep reading and you’ll find life lessons that every single father will relate to in this sweet—and brutally honest—memoir/advice book. 3. We can all find the funny in our daily lives. Everybody is Awful (Except You!) by Jim Florentine For the dad with a killer sense of humor, enter Everybody is Awful, penned by a comedian, podcaster and actor who appeared most recently on Amy Schumer’s hit film Trainwreck. This hilarious book covers everything from prank calls to social media madness while telling Jim’s story of his early days as a stand-up comedian. The cultural commentary in this hardcover is so relatable your dad won’t be able to put it down. 4. A coffee-table book about the awesomeness of dads. The Greatness of Dads by Kirsten Matthew Your dad will proudly display this tome on the coffee table, filled with compelling dad-themed quotes from such prominent figures as Nelson Mandela and F. Scott Fitzgerald. The book also features an open letter from Barack Obama to his daughters as well as poems, literary excerpts and pop-culture references collected by the author. It’s the best card you can give your dad! 5. The Greatest’s daughter shares insights on her legendary dad. Ali on Ali: Why He Said What He Said When He Said It by Hana Ali There’s something so heartwarming about a daughter writing about her dad. In this case, Muhammad Ali’s daughter, Hana, devotes this book to an explanation of the origins of the prizefighter’s most powerful quotes such as “Float like a butterfly sting like a bee!” Accompanied by more than 80 snapshots that span the entire life of the Greatest of All Time, we learn about Muhammad but also get a sense of his bond with his daughter. And isn’t that what Father’s Day is all about? 6. Coaches are a lot like dads. Most Valuable Dad: Inspiring Words on Fatherhood from Sports Superstars by Tom Limbert In this collection of inspiring words on fatherhood from such sports superstars as Tom Brady and Stephen Curry and organized by such topics as Empathy, Patience, Optimism and Character, Tom keys into the way dads are the ultimate to their kids. Give this book to the dad in your life and you’ll watch him smile as he reads more about his favorite sports figures.
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