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Meet three people who have truly flourished.

Transform Your Life and Flourish

Lucie Buissereth was almost finished with her medical residency when she realized this wasn’t the life she wanted. Atsushi Yamada was a successful corporate executive, but he wasn’t pursuing the one thing he’d loved since his youth. Alison O’Brien was a globe-trotting television producer at the helm of a new prime-time show. Her life was jam-packed, but still felt empty. Today, their lives couldn’t be more different. By following their hearts and using their strengths, they were all able to flourish. Here are their stories. Lucie Buissereth: Choosing to Flourish “‘What do you mean you want to be happy?’” Lucie Buissereth recalls this reaction from her family when she said she was giving up medicine. It was as if she’d delivered a painful blow. Lucie was just as devastated, but for different reasons. “I realized I was living a lie,” she says. All her achievements including becoming a doctor were aimed at gaining her family’s approval and not for herself. After a 36-hour shift, she says, “I thought, ‘I can’t do this anymore.’” Lucie’s epiphany, which came in the early 2000s almost two years into her residency at New York City’s Montefiore Medical Center, was the first step toward creating a flourishing life. Her innate character strengths—including honesty and bravery—would lead her further along the path to a truly satisfying life. Outward focus vs. inward satisfaction Research shows achievement for achievement’s sake, and not for the benefit of other people, is essential to flourishing. Lucie had had that once in her life. Obese as a child, weighing 220 pounds by age 10, Lucie decided in her late teens to slim down, and she did. “Fitness became my little thing,” she says. After that fateful 36-hour shift, Lucie turned on the TV and saw, of all things, adults jumping rope. She was watching the U.S. National Jump Rope Championship. The next day she called the sponsoring organization, USA Jump Rope, to ask how she could participate. Impossible, they said, because she had no experience, team or training. “But I could train myself—why not?” She continued to petition USA Jump Rope while growing more disillusioned with medicine. In 2004, she resigned her residency and, coincidentally, USA Jump Rope relented. Lucie’s perseverance—another of her character strengths—had paid off. “I was 38 years old and had never picked up a rope before, but I said ‘goodbye’ to medicine and went full force into competitions.” Lucie got coaching work at area gyms and dipped into her meager savings, but it was worth it. At the 2005 national championship, she took gold medals in each of the four speed-jumping and freestyle events in which she competed. “I knew right then and there what my calling was,” she says. “I was going to do something that could help others, particularly kids. I was going to turn this talent that I have—I don’t know where I got it—into a viable, beautiful business.” Jumping for joy! Lucie opened a gym on Long Island that focused solely on jump rope. She coached all ages, but it was the children who really thrived, becoming happier, healthier and more engaged at school and home. She found purpose and work that was totally engaging, two elements that are key to flourishing. Her improved well-being contributed to resilience, which would prove essential. In 2007, after years of severe headaches and other symptoms, Lucie was diagnosed with muscular dystrophy. “Doctors told me that within eight or nine months I would be in a wheelchair. I did my share of lamenting, crying, ‘Why me’ and all that, and then I said, ‘Enough.’ ” She has had relapses and remissions, “but I’m still standing. I’m still competing,” she says. Lucie was shopping when she met Staffen Lindner, a Swede in New York on business. “He asked if he could buy me coffee and that was it,” she says, giggling. They married and now live in Sweden. Lucie is finishing a motivational book, has introduced her programs in Swedish schools and returns to New York twice a year for jump rope camps. It’s not only about jump rope, though. “It’s more about encouraging kids, particularly girls, to be amazing,” she says. “To be fierce in themselves, and to know there’s nothing they cannot do.” Just like Lucie. Read about the science of flourishing: Go Beyond Happiness Atsushi Yamada: Creating His Niche Atsushi Yamada was always involved in music while growing up in Japan—singing in the church choir and playing organ, later playing guitar in a Beatles cover band, singing in the male chorus in high school and with the glee club in college. Even after he landed a job in sales with IBM, he assisted his former glee club conductor in directing choral performances, and “of course, I loved karaoke,” he says, laughing. Being so engaged—like Atsushi is in music—is important to flourishing. But he didn’t see how music could be anything but a hobby, even after his maestro passed away and chorus members asked him to take over. “I was really busy selling computers,” he says. “The conducting paid almost nothing. There was no way to survive without that [IBM] salary.” A couple of years later, he got a job offer selling life insurance for Sony that required less time in the office. He could have a nice income and more free time for conducting. He accepted. Using his strengths “I really didn’t expect to become a professional conductor. I wanted that, but on the other hand, if you just quit your job and you never had any experience studying music in school and you don’t have a teacher, and you say, ‘Now I am a conductor, could you give me a job?’ people think you’re crazy!” But Atsushi employed all his sales savvy, as well as his signature character strengths—perseverance, creativity and social intelligence—to make his dreams come true. He began by persuading Sony to sponsor a concert as a “social contribution.” Atsushi had his employer’s blessing again after the Great Hanshin earthquake of 1995 when he coordinated a series of benefit concerts. For the final performance, he got funding to hire an acclaimed singer, which included a trip to New York City (his first ever) to audition singers with the New York City Opera. “This was brave,” he says, chuckling at the thought of himself, a self-taught musician, auditioning the finest vocalists in the world. Bravery, another of Atsushi’s key strengths, would prove helpful in more ways. In New York, he asked opera officials about the possibility of an internship. They agreed. This opportunity led to a stint directing the touring company and, in 2003, Atsushi’s debut conducting Hansel and Gretel at Lincoln Center—where he received a standing ovation. The risks have paid off Decades have passed and Atsushi has now conducted some of the world’s greatest singers and musicians. He’s also found great purpose, raising money benefiting victims of the 2011 earthquake and tsunami in Japan and creating cultural exchange and educational opportunities for hundreds of young music students. Today Atsushi is principal conductor and co-founder of the Philharmonia Orchestra of New York, which made its premiere performances in March at Lincoln Center. PONY, as it’s called, incorporates orchestra and choral performance with the highest-definition film technology to “destroy stuffy classical traditions that can make this wonderful music accessible to new audiences,” he says. He is living his dream. And, “I would say to others who have a dream, a wish, that there is never zero percent chance of success,” he says. “There is always some chance. You just have to try.” Read more about what it takes to flourish in life: 5 Ways to Flourish Alison O’Brien: Racing Through Life Alison O’Brien had a little more than a mile to go in the 2013 Boston Marathon when a police officer halted her and other runners. There had been explosions near the finish line. That’s where her parents and 2-year-old niece were waiting. Terrified of what might’ve happened to her loved ones, Alison’s mind raced. “I thought, ‘Time is too precious. I have to treat it differently. I don’t want to have regrets.’” As a network TV producer, she had traveled the world making documentaries. And, prompted by a friend’s cancer diagnosis, she had taken up running and coaching with the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society’s Team in Training, raising money to fight blood cancers. Growing after tragedy She found meaning and joy from her work and her coaching and fundraising. Yet a painful divorce years earlier had deeply affected her. “Personally, I shut down a lot. I felt like I had to,” she says. The Boston Marathon bombings brought perspective—a character strength that helps us all flourish. “As I sat on that curb for an hour and a half, I realized there are no guarantees that we’ll have more time,” she says. Honesty and a loving heart are two of Alison’s top flourishing-related character strengths. She thought about things she hadn’t pursued, like a meaningful business idea. A new beginning And then there was her personal life. At the end of that awful day in 2013, Alison reunited with her family. They were fine, but Alison’s life had changed. That year, she launched JWalking Designs, selling fitness wear including running skirts for both women and men. She and her teammates had often complained about their running clothes—how the shorts didn’t fit right and they needed more pockets—and now she was doing something about it. Perseverance and leadership, qualities Alison possesses in spades, made it possible and helped both her and her business thrive. Now she’s “more present” for her family and has made room in her life for even more love. Alison met Chris Peterson at a mutual friend’s birthday party. Now she, Chris and Roxie (their dog) are a family. In May, Alison will run the New Jersey Marathon, which was her first race 10 years ago. She’ll dedicate every mile to people who have made a significant impact on her life. Some, like cancer victims she trained, have passed away. Many others will be there. “Once I opened myself up to living a different type of life, the riches that came from that were just amazing,” Alison says. “I’m excited to see what other things life has to offer. If you don’t make the most of your time, you’re not guaranteed any more of it.” So why not flourish? Lisa Ocker is an award-winning writer and editor based in the Dallas-Forth Worth area.

Smiling woman looking up from a laptop computer.

Positive Psychology

12 Top Positive Psychology Courses You Can Take Online

What brings a sense of purpose to our lives? Why is gratitude such an important factor in well-being? How can I be happier and bring a sense of authentic joy to those around me? Positive psychology is a fascinating field, but most of us aren’t able to set aside the time and money necessary to study for a master's or Ph.D. in the subject. Luckily technology has made it easier than ever to learn about the science of happiness since the days when Tal Ben-Shahar taught one of the first courses on the subject—and one of the most popular ever—at Harvard University, along with Shawn Achor. Information about positive psychology and well-being has now become much more widely available. Below are some of the best courses and certificate programs on positive psychology that you can access without having to leave the comfort of your own desk. 1. UPenn Positive Psychology Center Martin Seligman and the University of Pennsylvania's acclaimed Positive Psychology Center have coordinated with Coursera to create a five-course online certificate program called Foundations of Positive Psychology. The five courses offer an overview of the field, with insights into such topics as grit and character. They will be taught by regular UPenn MAPP (Masters in Applied Positive Psychology) professors including Angela Duckworth, Ph.D., and James Pawelski, Ph.D. For more information, click here. 2. Barbara Fredrickson Barbara Fredrickson, Ph.D., a psychology professor at North Carolina at Chapel Hill, Director of the PEP (Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology) Lab, and one of the founders of positive psychology, is an expert in the area of love and connection. You can get a taste of her research from her books, Positivity and Love 2.0, and articles, and now by taking her six-week MOOC (massive open online course) “Positive Psychology” on Coursera. The course includes discussion of concepts such as loving kindness and “positivity resonance,” as well as “practical applications of this science that you can put to use immediately to help you live a full and meaningful life.” For more information, click here. 3. Greater Good Science Center The Greater Good Science Center is a nonprofit research institute that provides excellent information and cutting-edge research on the psychology of well-being through its website, newsletter and books. They also offer a free online course called “The Science of Happiness” taught by University of California, Berkeley’s psychology professor Dacher Keltner, Ph.D., and Emiliana Simon-Thomas, Ph.D., the center’s science director. These two experts lead students through the fundamentals of positive psychology, such as why social ties are so important to well-being, the benefits of daily happiness practices and the new science of awe. You must register for the course, and it begins on a specific date (September 6, 2016), but you can take it at your leisure—as long as you finish within six months. The course (also a MOOC), taught on the EdX platform, is open to everyone, but for undergraduates, there is a midterm, final exam and class credits. Everyone else gets quizzes, polls and “emotional check-ins.” For more information, click here. 4. The Flourishing Center The Flourishing Center, founded by Emiliya Zhivotovskaya, offers a certificate in applied positive psychology (CAPP) program in locations all over the United States and Canada with a focus on flourishing, resilience, coaching and mentoring. Faculty include UPenn MAPP graduates, published authors and Live Happy writers such as Louisa Jewell, Louis Alloro and Carin Rockind. The Center has recently added an online option that covers the same curriculum as the in-person course and that has students connecting live online twice a week for 36 weeks. The online course is geared toward international students who don't have access to the in-person courses; however, exceptions are made. An application and interview are required for acceptance. For more information, click here. 5. The Big Know The Big Know, which partners with Life Reimagined—an AARP company, is a fantastic resource for free and low-cost online courses taught by some of the most respected experts in the mindfulness and happiness realms (many of whom have been featured in Live Happy). You can study “Brain Power: How to Improve Brain Health” with Wendy Suzuki, Ph.D., “Mindfulness and Meditation” with Richard Davidson, Ph.D., “How to Bring More Joy to Your Life” with Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., and the list goes on. Other instructors include Blue Zones' founder Dan Buettner and stress expert Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D. It is truly a gold mine of quick and easy access to expert teachings on happiness—done through video—available at your fingertips. For more information, click here. 6. Profit from the Positive If you are a business owner, coach or executive who would like to bring the power of positive psychology into your workplace, this is a great place to start. Margaret Greenberg and Senia Maymin, Ph.D., co-authors of the book Profit from the Positive (and Live Happy columnists), have put together a 5-week online certificate program of the same name that teaches leaders and executive coaches how to harness the science of happiness in order to increase team productivity, decrease turnover, put employees’ strengths to work at the office and increase the bottom line. The class unfolds over the course of ten 90-minute live video sessions with Margaret and Senia and includes all editable slides and worksheets with no licensing fee and membership in a growing international community of positive psychology practitioners. Live Happy readers can receive a 20% discount off of registration using the promo code: LiveHappyNow. For more information, click here. 7. Pursuit of Happiness Pursuit of Happiness is a nonprofit organization led by prominent psychologists and educators such as Paul Desan, Ph.D., director of psychiatric services at Yale New Haven Hospital, and Todd Kashdan, Ph.D., professor at George Mason University and co-author of The Upside of Your Dark Side. They promote positive psychology by disseminating information and offering an online certificate course called “The Psychology of Happiness,” which is taught by Desan and other experts, including Dan Tomasulo, Ph.D., who created the positive psychology curriculum at Columbia University Teacher’s College. The course, which comprises two live webinars, emphasizes practical implementation of the latest scientific findings in the happiness realm. For more information, click here. 8. Shawn Achor and Michelle Gielan Happiness expert, best-selling author and Live Happy columnist Shawn Achor has teamed up with Oprah Winfrey to create two 21-day courses on happiness. The first is called “21 Days to a Happier Life,” and the second is “21 Days to Inspire Happiness Around You.” The first class includes a happiness assessment, a discussion of daily happiness habits and creating a personal happiness formula. In the second class, students expand their happiness reach by learning about acts of kindness, increasing social bonds, inspiring positive change in others and sharing that happiness with the wider world. Michelle Gielan, Shawn’s wife, business partner at GoodThink Inc. and the author of Broadcasting Happiness, teaches a quick and inexpensive online course to help you improve positive communication and leadership called “Broadcasting Happiness.” For more information, click here. 9. Harvard University Extension Courses in the extension school are generally not taught by Harvard professors. They are, however interesting online courses that cost a whole lot less than enrolling at Harvard. The course catalog changes, but as of 2016, you could sign up to take “The Science and Application of Positive Psychology,” taught by Stephanie Peabody, Psy.D., Executive Director of the International Mind, Body, Health and Education Initiative. This is a general introduction to the concept of positive psychology, including "its implications for physical health and well-being." For more information, click here. 10. Via Institute on Character The nonprofit Via Institute on Character was created 15 years ago under the guidance of clinical psychologist Neal Mayerson, Ph.D., and positive psychology founding father Martin Seligman, Ph.D., in order to bring the benefits of “strengths theory” to as wide an audience as possible. Known primarily for its incredibly useful strengths survey, the institute also offers online courses, webinars and personalized coaching on such topics as “Character Strengths at Work,” “Positive Relationships and Character Strengths” and “Creating a Strengths-Based Life.” Courses are taught by Ryan Niemiec, Ph.D., education director at VIA and a licensed psychologist, and Donna Mayerson, Ph.D., lead consultant for applied practice at VIA and a licensed psychologist. For more information, click here. 11. Wholebeing Institute Run by happiness scholar and expert Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D., the Wholebeing Institute is devoted to educating the public about positive psychology, mindfulness, spirituality and the happiness movement. Taking a page from Martin Seligman's PERMA model for well-being, Tal has developed the acronym SPIRE to describe the mission of the Wholebeing Institute: Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Relational and Emotional. The Institute offers a certificate program at two-day in-person retreats with a changing roster of locations, as well as a variety of courses that you can access online. Self-directed courses are taught over five weeks and include video lectures from Tal. Subjects range from “Introduction to Positive Psychology” to “Mind-Body Connection,” “Relationships” and “Positive Psychology in Coaching.” For more information, click here. 12. University of Missouri Some universities—such as the University of Pennsylvania in particular—are well-known for their masters programs in positive psychology. The University of Missouri, however, offers a certificate in pos. psych of 15 class credits that is done completely online. The program entails a core course plus several electives. It is important to point out that this is a certificate, not a terminal or “higher” degree. It may be a good choice for someone who would like to further an existing career or perhaps become a life coach. For more information, click here. Emily Wise Miller is the web editor at Livehappy.com.

Positive Psychology

5 Ways to Flourish

While the specifics of what constitutes flourishing may vary by the individual, the basic foundation is the same. Building a life with more PERMA (positive emotions, engagement, relationships, meaning and achievement) is crucial. Here are the five pillars of PERMA: 1. Positive emotions Because of our natural negativity bias, it’s almost impossible to avoid negative emotions. However, offsetting those with positive interactions can have a powerful effect. John Gottman, Ph.D., suggests seeking out five positive emotions for each negative encounter. This can include practicing gratitude or self-compassion, doing something you love or even just making a point of being mindful of the positive emotion you’re feeling. Read more: 8 Easy Practices to Enhance Gratitude 2. Engagement Engagement can also be referred to as “flow,” that state where you are, in the words of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Ph.D., “completely involved in an activity for its own sake.” Seek out things you enjoy and can do well and then make it a point to participate in those things regularly. Read more: The Flow in All of Us 3. Relationships There’s plenty of research pointing to the value of relationships in our happiness and well-being. Practice building positive relationships both at work and at home by creating more positive interaction and weeding out the relationships that are harmful to your emotional health. Read more: 7 Keys to a Happy Relationship 4. Meaning Meaning gives us a sense of belonging and connects us to our higher purpose. Simple ways to develop more meaning include participating in a spiritual practice that resonates with you, volunteering for a cause or charity you believe in and making positive changes, however small, in your little corner of the world. Read more: 5 Ways to Get in Touch With Your Higher Calling 5. Achievement An important aspect of flourishing, according to Martin Seligman, Ph.D., is achievement for achievement’s sake, not for the sake of a waiting reward. Work toward an accomplishment in which the reward is merely the accomplishment itself, and you may be surprised to see how it enhances your sense of well-being. Read more: 90 Days to Breakthrough Success Paula Felps is the science editor at Live Happy magazine.

Practice

10 Ways You Can Be Happier Today

How can we feel happier on a day-to-day basis? Practicing gratitude, unplugging and living in the present moment come immediately to mind. Sometimes we know all the right answers, but putting those ideas into practice is the tough part. To help you fully embrace life as it unfolds before you, we've put together this list of helpful practices. (Happiness overachievers can click on the highlighted links to learn even more about each practice.) 1. Strengthen self-control We don’t have to exhaust our willpower or decision-making quota for the day when we make healthy habits automatic. Make one or more of these fundamental habits a regular part of your daily life in order to help you set and keep other healthy habits: 1. Get seven hours of sleep; 2. Go for a 20-minute walk; 3. Don’t let yourself get too hungry; 4. Take time to unclutter; 5. Give yourself a healthy treat. 2. Get some sleep According to sleep expert Michael Breus, Ph.D., sleeping less than seven hours each night can negatively impact your outlook, make you crave unhealthy foods and even kill your productivity. For those with serious trouble sleeping, he suggests you go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, take the TV out of the bedroom and get out of bed if you can’t fall asleep within 20 to 30 minutes. 3. Build up your emotional toolkit If you struggle with depression or bouts of anxiety, build up your emotional toolkit. Use the tool of self-compassion to treat yourself with the same loving kindness you would extend to a friend. Silence that inner critic and give yourself a soft place to land when things don’t go right or you are working through a challenging experience. Fill up your mind with kind thoughts about yourself. 4. Improve your conversations One of the most powerful skills you can practice is empathy. We show empathy by asking questions to better understand the person we’re talking with. When we hear our conversation partner expressing complex emotions, we might summarize or repeat what they’ve said back to them to show that we are listening with empathy. 5. Exercise to get these unique benefits Scientific research has shown there are countless connections between mind and body; to simplify a complicated process: exercise boosts dopamine and other chemicals in the brain that make us feel happier. Find an exercise you love and set a goal (run a 5K, walk 10,000 steps in a day, or go to yoga twice a week). When we have a specific goal, we are engaged with life and excited about our progress and our future. 6. Get happier at work Make your workday happier by brainstorming new solutions for a work challenge in the morning when your mind is fresh. Sit down with your coffee or tea and spend 10 minutes thinking up as many ideas, solutions and possible outcomes to a problem or opportunity your team is facing. Then share the best three ideas with another team member. 7. Play Research from the National Institute for Play shows that putting playtime back in our routines can boost creativity, reduce stress, increase brain function and even improve our relationships with others. Wake up your inner child and play—roll down a hill, play a board game with your family, jump rope or do a cartwheel. 8. Smile By smiling more often, you will make others around you feel better and you will feel better too, creating a reverberating circle of well-being. 9. Win the war against worry Author Erma Bombeck once wrote, “Worry is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but never gets you anywhere.” Karen Cassiday, Ph.D., president of the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, agrees, saying that worry is simply a fear of uncertainty. Keep a journal of your worries in order to keep them under control; in addition Karen recommends meditating, relaxing and downloading this free app. 10. Build up your resilience Surf champion Bethany Hamilton no longer views the shark attack that caused the loss of her arm as a negative in the scheme of her life. Instead, she practices resilience and fortitude by dwelling on all the positives that have resulted from it. Search for the silver lining and find the positives when you are facing adversity to become a more resilient person. Sandra Bienkowski is a contributing editor to Live Happy and the founder and CEO of TheMediaConcierge.net.

Podcast Home

Barbara Fredrickson on Relationships and Love

Barbara Fredrickson, Ph.D., serves as the president of the International Positive Psychology Association and is considered one of the most highly cited scholars in the field of psychology today. Her research reveals how micro-moments of love and other forms of positivity nourish your health, wisdom and longevity. In this episode, Live Happy co-founder and Editorial Director Deborah K. Heisz talks with Barbara on one of ten practices for choosing joy—relationships and love. What you'll learn in this podcast: The importance of day-to-day positive emotions The bar for experiencing love is lower than you think Simple steps to take to unlock more positivity in your daily life Links and resources mentioned in this episode: Purchase Live Happy: Ten Practices for Choosing Joy Take the free online course on positive psychology Thank you to our partner - AARP Life Reimagined!

Podcast Home

Margaret Greenberg – Profit from the Positive

Margaret H. Greenberg is a certified executive coach, international speaker, “Positive Work” columnist for Live Happy magazine, and the coauthor of the business book Profit from the Positive: Proven Leadership Strategies to Boost Productivity and Transform Your Business. Margaret is a pioneer in the field of positive psychology, having graduated from the University of Pennsylvania’s very first Master of Applied Positive Psychology program. In this episode, Margaret and Live Happy Co-Founder, COO and Editorial Director Deborah Heisz talk about the emerging field of positive psychology, explore numerous tools to help you profit from the positive and offer advice to help you find your authentic happiness. What you'll learn in this podcast: Why positive psychology is not the same as positive thinking How to apply at least one tool to profit from the positive How to learn more about positive psychology to transform your life and business Links and resources mentioned in this episode: Download a free sample chapter from Profit from the Positive Purchase a copy of Profit from the Positive: Proven Leadership Strategies to Boost Productivity and Transform Your Business Learn more about the Profit from the Positive Certificate Program Thank you to our partner - AARP Life Reimagined! Thanks for listening! Thank you so much for joining us this week on Live Happy Now. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the bottom of the post. Also, please leave an honest review for the Live Happy Now Podcast on iTunes! Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and helps others to find the podcast; we greatly appreciate it! They do matter in the rankings of the show, and we read each and every one of them. Special thanks to Margaret Greenberg for joining us this week. Related articles: What is Positive Psychology? What is it NOT? A Positive Approach to Problems The Achoo! Effect: 3 Reasons Others Benefit from Your Good Mood

Young couple watching a movie in theater.

Lifestyle

5 Must-Watch Movies for the Holidays

Movies inspire and entertain us. They bring us together and keep us laughing (or crying) on a dark winter's day when it's too cold to go out and play. One thing good movies can also do is show us character strengths—those virtues or qualities that define us as individuals. The VIA Institute on Character has defined 24 character strengths—such as bravery, humor and integrity—which all of us have but use to varying degrees. This holiday season, try watching movies with friends and family and then talk about what’s most meaningful to you, or debate the best virtues of each character. 1. Frozen Since this is now officially the most popular animated film of all time, you’ve likely seen Elsa’s efforts to handle her “frozen” powers and Anna’s journey to save Elsa. What most people seem to miss is the “power” of Anna’s character strengths. We all can learn from Anna’s bravery and perseverance as she goes off into the wilderness, faces down wolves, the bitter cold and the unknown to save her sister. Anna is driven by the strength of love, as well as other strengths like fairness, teamwork, zest and curiosity. 2. Groundhog Day This unique comedy portrays an ungrateful, mean-spirited weatherman who finds himself trapped, repeating the same day over and over. Like a bad dream, he’s caught in the same routines and daily irritations, with no ability to do anything about it. It’s not until he begins to live fully and engage his strengths that he awakens from his autopilot experience. Look for the character strengths of gratitude, love of learning, kindness and curiosity. 3. The Blind Side Leigh Anne Tuohy’s strengths of authenticity, bravery and persevering kindness are on full display as she helps a young man who has been cast aside by society. She uncovers his suppressed talents and hidden strengths, bringing him into her family and loving him like her own son. She creates an environment for him to flourish and helps him navigate educational systems that would otherwise have failed him. 4. It’s a Wonderful Life It’s hard to imagine a holiday season without this cherished classic, which film experts call the single “most inspiring movie” in film history. The popularity of this film and its hero, George Bailey, has to do with its four key messages: It’s never too late to improve yourself; be grateful for what you have; prioritize family/friends; and when in doubt, be kind to your neighbor. Look for those and for George’s many character strengths such as forgiveness, perseverance, hope and kindness. 5. Joyeux Noel (Merry Christmas) While not for the entire family, this French drama tells the unbelievable true story of Scottish, French and German soldiers who call a truce and cease-fire on Christmas Eve during World War I. When the soldiers step across enemy lines and share family photos and champagne, we are reminded of the human connection we all share. Our own strength of wisdom builds as we see there is a common humanity that transcends even the horrors of war. Look for the character strengths of kindness, teamwork, fairness and perspective/wisdom. Ryan Niemiec is the Education Director at the Via Institute on Character, and co-author of Positive Psychology at the Movies and Movies and Mental Illness.

Reading

3 Habits to Boost Resilience

I’d been reading Bouncing Forward: Transforming Bad Breaks into Breakthroughs when I hit a few wrong keys on my computer and accidentally deleted my utilities folder. It’s the kind of thing that sets you into a the-world-is-coming-to-an-end panic, which I felt, but only briefly. The book had equipped me with a sense of perspective, and I calmly went about the business of restoring what I’d lost. Now, eight hours later, I still can’t print documents or send emails, but I’m heartened by the knowledge that I’m a stronger, more resilient person. Bouncing Forward was written by Michaela Haas, a mindfulness coach with a Ph.D. in Asian Studies and Buddhism teacher at the University of California, Santa Barbara. Her subject is post-traumatic growth—the positive, transformative changes that some people experience as they struggle with adversity. The upside of adversity Also on my nightstand is another new volume, Upside: The New Science of Post-Traumatic Growth by journalist Jim Rendon. Both of these books share stories of people who have withstood staggering crises: they were prisoners of war or concentration-camp survivors, they lost a child or their entire family to a drunken driver or a natural disaster, they were left paralyzed after a horrific accident or they were the victims of unspeakable violence. With hard work and grit each eventually emerged from trauma with deeper relationships, a new sense of purpose and an increased appreciation of life. It’s impossible not to be moved, inspired and fortified by these tales. Few of us, as Michaela writes, will be attacked by a shark, as surfer Bethany Hamilton was, or targeted by the Taliban, like Malala Yousafzai, the extraordinary Nobel Prize-winning advocate for girls’ education. But we all endure loss and pain in our lives and we can all learn lessons from the science of post-traumatic growth on how to deal with bad breaks, both the small ones—like a computer crash—and the ones that rip apart the fabric of our lives. Read more: The Bounce-Back Effect Three daily habits, according to Michaela and Jim, will help us cultivate courage and resilience in the face of adversity: 1. Meditate Spend 12 minutes every morning and every evening meditating. Simply sit in a comfortable position with your eyes closed or slightly open and bring your attention to your breath, observing how it fills your body and then flows out again. If your attention wanders to the sound of a honking horn outside or your to-do list, gently, without reproach, bring your attention back to your breath. Meditation, Michaela says, trains us in regulating stress and calming fear, the very skills we need to confront and recover from adversity. You might want to experiment with a form of meditation called Loving-Kindness Meditation (sometimes called Compassion Meditation). Again, sit in a comfortable position and pay attention to your breath. Then, focusing on your heart region, Michaela suggests, think about someone for whom you have very warm, positive feelings. Now replace the focus on your breath with these thoughts as you inhale and exhale: “May you enjoy happiness and the causes of happiness,” “May you be free from suffering and the causes of suffering.” After a few minutes extend those warm thoughts to yourself: “May I enjoy happiness and the causes of happiness,” “May I be free from suffering and the causes of suffering.” This practice of loving-kindness enhances your ability to generate positive emotions even in the face of a distressing situation. Read more: Train Yourself to Love in 4 Steps 2. Appreciate Cultivate a practice of gratitude and appreciation. Every day, write down three things you are grateful for; jot down the first three things that come to mind. These can be little things—the basil that’s blooming in your backyard garden—or bigger things, like good news on a medical test. “When the pudding hits the fan, appreciation becomes invaluable,” Michaela says, but it’s also easy to become downtrodden as we confront challenges. If your default position is to focus on the gifts in your life, you’ll find it easier to keep your spirits uplifted and move on to what needs to be done. 3. Connect Instead of shutting out other people by texting or checking emails as you go through your day, look for opportunities to engage. A rich body of research, Jim says in his book, shows that connection with other people is a key predictor of growth after a traumatic event. Even online communities help trauma survivors of all kinds feel more optimistic, confident and empowered. So, consider an experiment: for a few days, make a point of chatting with the barista at your coffee shop or the cashier at the supermarket; smile at passers-by on the street; hold the elevator doors for a stranger. You might discover that these small acts of building community provide a boost to your sense of well-being. Read more: The Science of Post-Traumatic Growth Shelley Levitt is a freelance journalist based in Southern California, and editor at large for Live Happy.

Reading

James and Suzie Pawelski – Romance and Research

Suzie Pileggi Pawelski is a contributing editor for Live Happy magazine as well as a wellness counselor specializing in the science of happiness and its effects on health and relationships. Her 2010 Scientific American Mind cover story "The Happy Couple" was selected by the magazine as one of its most intriguing articles of recent years.James Pawelski, Ph.D., is Director of Education and Senior Scholar in the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania. For the last ten years, he has served as the founding director of the Master of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program, the world's first degree program in positive psychology. He is also the founding director of the International Positive Psychology Association.Live Happy COO, Co-Founder, and Editorial Director Deborah Heisz sits down with James and Suzie to discuss how research from positive psychology can lead to meaningful and long-lasting relationships.In this episode, you'll learn:The importance of applying positive psychology research to relationshipsStrengths-based understanding for you andyour partnerAn interactive approach torelationshipsHow to give and receive strengths with your partnerLinks and resources mentioned in this episode:Download afree sketch noteof this episodePurchase a copy of On Human Flourishing: A Poetry AnthologyThank you to our partner -AARP LifeReimagined!Thanks for listening!Thank you so much for joining us this week on Live Happy Now. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the bottom of the post.Also,please leave an honest review for theLive Happy Now Podcast on iTunes! Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and helps others to find the podcast, we greatly appreciate it! They do matter in the rankings of the show, and we read each and every one of them.Special thanks to James and Suzie PileggiPawelskifor joining us this week.Related articles:The Power of PassionLove Well to Live WellBuilding Lasting, Loving Families

science

Find the Sacred in Everyday Life

In our fast-paced and commodified world, we are encouraged to fly at lightning speed and to relish the latest material thing or fleeting pleasure. At the same time, the study and practice of spirituality has grown enormously in popularity and continues to receive widespread attention. Our frenzied, plugged-in lives have driven us to seek some sort of spiritual refuge or respite from the technological whirlwind. (See: the success of a meditation app like Headspace or other evidence of an increased search to slow down and unplug.) Perhaps this heightened interest in spirituality reflects a personal thirst for meaning in our lives. Many of us are seeking not only to slow down but also to find a firm footing on a more solid—and perhaps sacred—ground. The search for the sacred "Spirituality can have a positive impact on our well-being by helping us focus on what we value most in life," says Ken Pargament, a world-renowned scholar of religion. The Bowling Green State University psychologist has been studying spirituality for more than 35 years and has written several books on the subject, including Spiritually Integrated Psychotherapy and The Psychology of Religion and Coping. Defined as “the search for the sacred,” spirituality enables us to see the extraordinary in the ordinary, Ken says. "Sacred" refers to human perceptions on qualities often associated with the divine or higher powers: transcendence, ultimacy (essential and absolute truth), boundlessness, interconnectedness and spiritual emotions. Spirituality enhances well-being Research has shown that people who find the sacred in various spheres of life—such as relationships, work, and nature—enjoy enhanced well-being. For example, a 2010 study conducted by Ken and colleagues found that pregnant couples who viewed their marriages and pregnancies as sacred experienced increased positive emotions and were better able to overcome adversity during tough times. Similarly, research headed by Yale professor Amy Wrzesniewski in 1997, then at the University of Michigan, found that people who see their work as sacred report higher levels of job satisfaction. More recently, a 2014 study by Ken and colleagues showed that sacred moments were commonly reported by mental health providers and were linked with positive outcomes for the patient, the provider and the therapeutic relationship. Patients experienced healing and growth, and providers a greater sense of meaning in their work, according to Ken. Read More: The New Prayer Finding the divine If you feel you may be missing aspects of the divine and the sacred in your own life, Ken suggests asking yourself these questions to help foster a more integrated sense of spirituality: What do you hold sacred? Do some soul-searching to identify what matters most to you. How much time are you devoting daily to your spiritual strivings? How might you find more time everyday to search for the sacred? Where do you find the sacred? There are many spiritual pathways. Some of us find the sacred in relationships, some in prayer or meditation, still others through study or action. Reflect on where you experience your deepest feelings of awe, gratitude, mystery, timelessness and love. Emotions like these provide clues about where you might find the sacred and might try to spend more of your time. How committed are you? Practice makes perfect in the spiritual realm as in other areas of life. Spiritual growth takes commitment and hard work. Prepare yourself for a long-term process and don’t be discouraged by frustrations along the way. Read more by Suzann PileggiPawelski: The Power of Passion Suzann Pileggi Pawelskiis a freelance writer specializing in the science of happiness and its effects on relationships and health.