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Follow along with the transcript below for episode: Practicing Digital Wellness With Amy Blankson [INTRODUCTION]   [00:00:02] PF: Thank you for joining us for Episode 415 of Live Happy Now. Our digital lifestyles often don't seem to support our wellbeing. But this week's guest is going to tell us how we can change it. I'm your host, Paula Felps, and this week, I am sitting down with Amy Blankson, CEO and co-founder of the Digital Wellness Institute. Amy has made it her mission to cultivate and wellbeing in a digital era. On May 5th, Digital Wellness Day, she is unveiling the Digital Wellness University and Digitally Well School to help create healthier digital cultures at school, work, and home. This week, she's here to share some of her strategies to improve our digital wellness. [EPISODE]   [0:00:45] PF: Amy, thank you for coming back on Live Happy Now. [0:00:48] AB: So happy to be here. Thanks for having me, Paula. [0:00:51] PF: It has been way too long since we talked and I'm very, very happy to be able to sit down with you again. [0:00:56] AB: Yes, this is always one of my favorite shows to get to join in. So thank you. [0:01:01] PF: Well, you have something fantastic going on with Digital Wellness Day, and I think, we'll start with the baseline. Tell us what digital wellness means. [0:01:10] AB: Digital wellness is a bit of a foreign term for a lot of people. We know digital, we know wellness, but you put them together, and suddenly, it's confusing. Fortunately, I think that the world has been more tuned in to really addressing some of the needs of mental health, physical health, burnout that we're seeing all across the globe. As part of that, digital wellness is becoming a more frequently talked about topic. Digital wellness is really looking at how technology is impacting our lives for the better and for the worse, and trying to optimize our behaviors to really find a better sense of balance for greater happiness. We know that if we are overusing our tech, it makes us less happy. If we're not using tech, we feel isolated sometimes from really important parts of the world. What we're trying to do is find that really sweet spot for what we call digital flourishing, that space where you feel like you're at your best self, and you're in control of your tech, not the other way around. [0:02:08] PF: That's so difficult to achieve, because I think we all have those moments where we really consider throwing our phone out the window. But then we're like, we realized we don't know anybody's phone number anymore and it would be a bad thing to do. But we just hit that breaking point with our technology. First of all, how did you start discovering how we can find this holy grail called digital wellness? [0:02:29] AB: Well, it actually started – it's been a long journey in this field of happiness, and looking at different factors, and cycles that affects human happiness. Back when we started GoodThink back in 2006, we were really responding to economic distress at that time. It was, how do I find happiness when the economy is so up in the air. Then, that morphed over time to – well, robots take my job. Then it became, how do I find happiness in the midst of the pandemic, and then post-pandemic. What I do when I'm speaking to audiences, I do a lot of listening, but before and after too the pain points that people are going through. I really heard loud and clear that there was a pain point around technology, and happiness, and an uncertainty about the future, and fear about the future, to be honest. I started doing research in this field with the assumption and the hypothesis that our tech was making us less happy. As I started writing, the research didn't confirm what I actually believed about tech at the time. That was – it wasn't the tech making us less happy, it was the way we were using tech that was making us less happy, that tech itself is not an animate character that has any sort of preferences. It is designed in certain ways that prey upon our human tendencies to need to check in or fear of missing out. But truly, it comes back to us as humans, being in control of our own behaviors and habits, which comes back to a sense of awareness. We know when we are in control, we are happier because we have more time to do the things that we really want to do and be the people we want to be. We want to be more connected. We want to be able to look people in the eyes. We want to feel productive at the end of the day and we don't want to be overwhelmed. These things are topics that I started writing on. I changed the thrust of my book to really work on human agency as a message that we can cocreate the future of happiness together if we are future-focused. Let's quit bemoaning the fact that we no longer have landlines because truly, cell phones make a lot of sense. They do and they're everywhere. I think that that will be the future. But instead, let's look ahead and say, "Okay. Knowing that this is in our path, what are we going to do to optimize the world? What do we need to put in place right now today to set ourselves up for success for future generations? I think that we have a lot of power. Sometimes we just forget how much power we have to do that. [0:05:01] PF: Does it change generationally? Is the way that technology stresses us out or makes us happy change with, say, Gen Z to Baby Boomer? [0:05:11] AB: I think our tolerance for tech changes based on generations. But I think the issues and the struggles that we're facing are relevant from literally one years old to 101. That we are using tech in different ways, different apps, different functionalities. But I have also found that the capacity to handle longer periods of tech is much more fluid for digital natives and it's less threatening. We know, and of course, in positive psychology, that anything that feels threatening, that spikes, our cortisol levels to go up. That actually decreases our ability to handle tech for long periods of time. For instance, my mother will be on tech for maybe 30 minutes, and get completely stressed out by it. That is her max limit. Whereas somebody who is younger, and as a tech help desk agent who's used to working on devices for long periods of time, and has really positive habits outside of time that they're working on tech, then they could actually handle up to 12 hours. This depends on your behaviors, your habits that you wrap it around yourself to be able to see how long we can respond to it. What point is a point of diminishing return for you? [0:06:27] PF: That's really interesting. Is that something that, say, employers or teachers should be aware of as they're dealing with people that we don't all have the same tolerance for technology. [0:06:38] AB: We should absolutely be addressing this, and I think we are just at the cusp of this conversation within HR departments and wellbeing departments. Because truthfully, we haven't been really tracking the impact of tech on wellness. There's been a huge investment in wellness throughout the pandemic, from employers, from gym memberships, meditation apps, stipends to spruce up your home environment. But I think we're missing the mark on this particular conversation, because we're not actually opening up to talk about how our boundaries have shifted dramatically as a society. Since the pandemic started, the amount of time we're spending on devices has gone up by 30%. We all anticipated that would go back down after we shifted back to hybrid work or back to in-person work. In fact, the levels have actually stayed consistent and even risen just a little bit.   [0:07:30] PF: Really?   [0:07:31] AB: That means, on average, that our dear teenagers are now spending an average of eight hours a day on devices. As adults, we're spending about five to six hours. Some of the heavy tech users are up to 17 hours on average. That's on average.   [0:07:48] PF: How is that even possible?   [0:07:49] AB: Which brings us a lot of questions. [0:07:51] PF: Yes. How is that even possible? Like how can you spend that much time on technology? [0:07:55] AB: I think that, at first, it sounds like a lot. Then all of a sudden, you think about all the times that we're carrying our devices in our back pocket, we're bringing them to the dinner table, we wake up to our alarm clock set on our phone, we're multitasking all day long. Even when we go to the movies, some people have their devices with them and are checking their devices in the movie. All of a sudden, that makes sense that every waking minute, we have devices with us. That's a big switch from a few years ago when we use them occasionally, or strategically, or when we were at work. Now, our lives are so blended that they've literally become attached at the hip. [0:08:35] PF: Yes. Yes. With us being so connected to our phones, what is that doing to us? Because you know, to your point, there are very good uses for it. Some of the time when we talk about the time spent online. Well, teenagers and younger users are also using that instead of going to a library. They're looking up, they're doing research, they're doing things like that. We have a niece who's 18, and she spends a lot of time on her phone, but she is not texting, she's not playing games. It's just that's where she does her research and that's how it is. But what does it do when we are always on our phones? What's the price that we're paying for that? [0:09:13] AB: That's such a good question. I mean, as an individual, I don't have a specific price to tell you. But as an employee, we know that the average cost and retention recruitment is about $6,700 per employee per year. That's burnout, replacement, and recruitment retention. As individuals, I think the effects of that we're feeling are back pain, eye strain, text thumb, text neck is an actual indication of overuse of technology. But we are also seeing a lot of mental health issues that are emerging, and they become intertwined with other habits that are happening in life. In many ways, the tech is exacerbating the underlying issues that are already there. Things like feeling socially isolated or feeling like you're overwhelmed in general, having a full inbox doesn't help with that, right? I's hard to tease out the exact effect and the impact. But I think that from an inherent perspective of an individual who's living in this time, the fact that this is so widespread, and something that we can all relate to that feeling like we, "Oh my gosh, I left my phone at home. What if something bad happens?" or "I can't get a hold of so on. I don't know what's going to happen. I don't remember their cell phone number." These are things that cause us stress all day long. I think that we are feeling the effects and really needing to dial down our use to really what's most important for us. That's what Digital Wellness Day is all about. This is the big holiday, we're coming up to celebrating on May 5th. It's our fourth annual digital wellness day. The whole idea is just pause for anything, any time period from five minutes, to five hours, to stop and think about how you're using tech. We call it practicing the pause. The idea is just to step back from your devices and think about when you're using them, why you're using them, where you're using them, how you're using them, and with whom you're using them. Because a lot of times, we default to certain behaviors, we find actually that we pick up our phone 150 times a day. Half of those times, nobody has texted us or called us or email us. We're just checking to see if we were needed. So 50% of the time, we don't need to be on our devices, but we feel like we do. This is a moment to step back and say, "Okay. Am I getting unnecessary notifications? Am I trying to juggle too many apps and gadgets that maybe I don't need them right now, and stepping back to really focus on what are my goals, my priorities, my values that make me the happiest version of myself, and really realigning your priorities?" I think this is a constant process for us in this digital era, coming back to what is grounding us and who do we want to be going forward. [0:12:03] PF: Yes. That takes a lot of thought, it really does. Because we've become so trained by our phones, like we respond to the bullying. It's like, you can be in the middle of a conversation. It's like, "Oh, let me get that." You would never, if you're talking with someone face-to-face, and another human just came and interrupted you, and you wouldn't immediately shift your attention to them. You'd be like, "Excuse me, I'm having this conversation." Yet, when our device does, it will just shut the other person out and see what our phone wants. [0:12:31] AB: Exactly.   [0:12:32] PF: How do we retrain ourselves? I know that's part of what Digital Wellness Day is about. How do we start retraining ourselves? To your point, maybe cut down some of these notifications that we're getting? [0:12:44] AB: Absolutely. I always say it comes back to setting your aim. Awareness, intention and momentum. Awareness starts with looking around and seeing what's happening. That very dynamic you're talking about, something that in digital wellness, we call phubbing, which means phones snubbing. If you start paying attention today to the number of people who are phubbing each other, it will blow your mind. Once you see it, you can't unsee it. It's that's pervasive. Sometimes we fall into the habit, because it seems like this is just what everyone is doing these days. Of course, it's okay to check your phone when it rings in the middle of a conversation, because you don't know who it is. It could be a spam call, or it could be your mother and you need to pick it up. One of the things, building awareness and then setting your intention. My intention is, when I have coffee with a friend, I turned my phone on Do Not Disturb, I tuck it in my back pocket or in a bag so that I can give my full attention to the person in front of me. Then, momentum is actually creating the habits that make it possible for you to do this easier in the future. For instance, one of the things I have been doing is telling people what I'm doing. Whether it's my team, or my family, I say, "Hey, I really want to do this together." I've been noticing there's a lot of phubbing, so let's make this something we work on together. That helps provide accountability and keeps making my job easier because self-regulation is hard. We need a lot of people around us, and we need a culture change, which is going to require a huge movement of really aware people to make that happen. [0:14:23] PF: With a generation that's been raised on digital, can that be done? Because they are so used to – they're so attached to their phones. How do you change it if it's ingrained in them? We see little kids who are using mom and dad's phone to play a game or do something like that. How do we change that? [0:14:42] AB: Oh my goodness. You hit on such a great point. Every time I speak to audiences about digital wellness, our mind immediately jumps to younger people, especially teenagers. Oh, those teenagers on their devices, right? There is definitely something there that we need to be paying attention to. Seventy-seven percent of parents are worried that their teens are overly addicted to devices. But interestingly, and that other 40% think their parents are also addicted to their devices. I actually have a lot of hope for the younger generation because they've been raised with language, and teaching in schools, and tools to help with digital boundaries. The group that I worry about the most are the 16 to 24 range, because – I can tell you this specifically, because my daughter was born in 2007, two months before the iPhone came out. [Inaudible 0:15:32] my daughter with the iPhone. I know that all of those who were born beyond her were born before pre-iPhone, and pre-boundaries. As they've been growing up, suddenly, they had free rein with the device, and then the boundaries were taken away. They think it's their right to be able to do whatever they want on their devices. Of course, we're seeing a lot of young people who are overusing devices. Fortunately, the younger they are, I feel like schools have taught them, "Hey, there's screen time limits. Let's be mindful. Let's do other things. There's a balance." That's great. I also worry about the older working populations right now, everyone above that 24-year range gap, because I think that they also struggle with trying to integrate this digital world, trying to be part of it, trying to be relevant and responsive. What I see with that group is that they're not being irresponsible, necessarily with tech, they're being hyper responsible. They feel like they have to get back to people so quickly. They feel like they have to juggle everything. I know it's stressful, because we know that the cortisol levels are rising. In this dynamic, I think we really need to pay attention to how can we support different generational needs, and really tune into how we can teach specifically to the troubles that they are facing? [0:16:54] PF: That makes so much sense. I know you're rolling out a couple things for digital wellness day that I want to talk about. But first, there's something that you said, I heard you speak and you talked about how it's not the amount of time you spend online, it's the quality of what you do offline. Talk about that. Because we know parents – people, we want a prescription, like how much time should I spend online? How much time should I allow my children to spend online? You have such a beautiful answer for this. Would you talk about that, please? [0:17:22] AB: I would be so happy to. This is my new soapbox, because the language for us in digital wellness has been dominated by the recommendations coming out of the American Academy of Pediatrics. It used to be one hour of entertainment screen related time was recommended for five years and older. Then, it was two hours, and then the pandemic came, then suddenly we're like, "Well, just don't be on devices all the time, okay?"   [0:17:45] PF: Twenty hours is fine. [0:17:46] AB: That's fine, we're good. Well, I think that what's happening now is that we are recognizing that there's not defined entertainment time and defined school time, it is all blended. So measuring the amount of time you're on screens is actually less useful than measuring how you feel when you're on devices, and measuring what you're doing when you're outside of time with devices. I feel passionately that we need to talk as well about, "Are you sleeping well? Are you journaling, and meditating, and hanging out with friends? Are you building up all of those offline habits that help you to be your best self when you're online? I think that's equally as important as the amount of screen time you're spending. If parents get locked into focusing on, "Well, here's your two hours of screen time. Now, you're done." Then the children are still eating junk food on the couch, just languishing. Then I'm not sure that we've actually helped them to thrive in the way that we really wanted them to. Thinking about what we're doing when we're online, what we're doing when they're offline, and supporting that with really positive habits all the way around. [0:18:56] PF: That is terrific. Digital Wellness Day, you give us a couple of things that you're presenting that are going to help us with all this talk about what you're introducing. [0:19:07] AB: Absolutely. We have a Digital Wellness Day toolkit that anybody can download for free if you want to hold your own event at your school, maybe in your community, maybe just with your family. There's a lot of ideas in this toolkit that can be downloaded at digitalwellnessday.com. That is complete with ideas as well for individuals who are thinking, "Okay. What am I going to do? When I step away from technology, what do I do?" It could be, go outside and take a walk, practice meditating, journal, do some reflection time with a friend. Lots of great ideas in this toolkit. We'll also be holding two special events on digital wellness day that I think you might want to tune into. One is a panel on digitally well schools and we'll be announcing the first ever digitally well university in the entire world, and introducing those individuals on the panel. We'll also have a panel for a digitally well companies. So we'll be announcing the first digitally well company as well. If you're looking for ideas either for how to implement digital wellness within a school setting, or within a company setting, that'll be a great opportunity to get some really tactical strategies for what that looks like. Otherwise, we actually want people to not be online and to maybe go have some time and space where they can just play and joy, feel like they are thriving and flourishing for the day. My hope is that you will go share the word with other people, encourage them to join you in celebrating Digital Wellness Day. Then, we'd love to hear about the experience. So we will be circulating survey as well to hear, what did you do on digital wellness day? What did you learn? Was it worth it? So that we can continue to iterate and make this day better. [0:20:45] PF: That's so fascinating. What does the university entail? Is it like ongoing course? What exactly are the details of that? [0:20:54] AB: The first Digitally Well University, I can now officially share, is going to be Virginia Tech. We've been working with them for the past several months, and they have taken phenomenal level of leadership on campus in order to introduce digital wellness as a topic to raise student health. They have done everything from having on-campus talks about digital wellness. They have PowerPoint slides that have been given to the faculty to play as screensavers while students are walking into the classroom. The dining halls are putting informational little packets on tables in the dining hall. They have residents, real-life teachers who are going to be talking about it with students within the dorm setting. It's not just one thing, it's really the fact that they have taken this to multiple different levels of the university, and tried to infuse digital wellness, and everything that they're doing. They even created spaces on campus that are designed to be a space where you can step away from your tech and just have a refresher. We really wanted to highlight them, and some of the practices they're doing on campus because we think that they're repeatable. That would be really wonderful for other universities and schools to pick up and make their own as well. [0:22:06] PF: Oh, that's terrific. Then, for companies, we'll talk about leaders, and bosses, managers. First, how can they set an example of being digitally well, and being more mindful of not only their own use, but what their employees might be going through? [0:22:24] AB: Absolutely. The first digitally well company in the world is going to be ATB. At ATB, they've done a lot of things within the company to build up digital wellness as a topic. They train the leaders, they appointed one of their chief people officers to be certified in digital wellness, who she then went and trained another manager in the organization who then took the concept of digital wellness to 80 different teams internally, where they completed communication charters to talk about how they were dialoguing within the organization and how they were establishing digital boundaries within their teams for communication. When is it okay to talk after hours, or what's happening on the weekends? How do you take a vacation, and feel like you don't have to plug in, which would be amazing. What do you do when your boss is the one who's creating the issue, and you're trying to figure out how to hold them accountable. They've created systems, and processes, policies that we're creating a white paper to document all of these wonderful things, how they implemented it, what did it look like, and then how can it be repeated as well? [0:23:30] PF: Oh, terrific. Yes. When that is ready, I want to have you back. I want to talk about that. Because I think everyone is affected by this, everyone is concerned with it. Then, so we've talked about the schools, we've talked about businesses. How about at home? What can we do because we're all struggling with it on some level? What can we do at home? How do we implement a digital wellness program in our own family? [0:23:54] AB: Like all great personal change, I think it starts with taking one tiny micro habit and focusing on that in our family. I have three young girls, they're 10, 13, and 16. I definitely understand the challenge of trying to negotiate school, working on projects in the living room, on your computers. Someone might have a TV on the room, someone might have their phone beside them. We found on the pandemic that we really hit a fever pitch of everyone being online trying to do everything. We made one simple rule. That was, that when somebody new walks into the room, everyone looks out from their device.   [0:24:32] PF: Oh, I love that.   [0:24:34] AB: Such a low bar. I mean, really, it was just like just acknowledge the other human being in the room was the basic rule. But it was a starting place, and I think that it set our intention, that other people are important, and it's something that we can all do whether you are a toddler or you are a senior citizen. Very simple. Another practice we have is that we try to keep all phones in the kitchen. Rather than having the children charge their devices in their room, we keep them at a central tech hub in the kitchen. Little things like this that I think can be simple actions that signal. The other important thing that I do as mother, which I think is an important role too is that, when my children come to me, and they're saying, "Mommy, when are you going to be done for the day on your devices?" What I heard loud and clear was that they're not asking me, when are you going to be done with work? Because truly, the answer is never, I have so many things to do, right? We all have this long to-do list. What they were really asking was, when are you going to have time for me? Now, I have started to set my intention, like, "Hey, I have a lot of things going on today, you might see me on screens a lot. But at 2:30, this is going to be your time, let's go do something special together." That's all they needed. They could totally let me work as a – I work from home, and so they were very happy to let me get my work done and not interrupt. That's important for distraction. By me communicating something of value to them. That was a big lightbulb moment for me that I think is very repeatable for a lot of people communicating when you're available, and trying to set that time aside to really be device free, so that you can connect very personally. [0:26:15] PF: That's terrific. That's something all of us can do too. I'm glad it wasn't a complex thing, because homework.   [0:26:22] AB: Absolutely.   [0:26:22] PF: Thank you so much. There's so much that we could learn from you. I'm excited to see where this research continues to go, and what you learn, because obviously, this is an issue that's going to continue to grow and evolve as technology, and AI, and everything continues to expand. I look forward to have more conversations about this with you, and we will tell people, we'll give links on the landing page so they can go discover more about Digital Wellness Day. We'll be talking about it on our social media and sharing it. But I guess, before I let you go, can you tell us what you hope everyone gets out of Digital Wellness Day, on May 5th? [0:26:58] AB: My hope is that everybody will step away and realize how much power they do have to control the world around them, particularly around technology. Though we have a lot of fears around AI, we have fears around social media, we have fears around what's happening with the election, or with what's happening with work or the economy. That those things all are things that maybe we can't control the big topics, but we can control our own behavior around them. Digital Wellness Day is a place for you to start and own your own sense of human agency to shape the world the way that you want to shape it using your own behavior. [0:27:39] PF: I love it. Amy, thank you so much. It was a delight having you here. As I said, we will do this again soon.   [0:27:45] AB: Thank you so much, Paula. [END OF INTERVIEW] [0:27:50] PF: That was Amy Blankson, talking about digital wellness. We'd like to invite you, and your school, or company to participate in Digital Wellness Day on May 5th. Visit our website to learn more about it. We'll also tell you how to follow Amy on social media, discover some of her free resources, or buy her best-selling book, The Future of Happiness. Just visit us at livehappy.com and click on the podcast tab. That is all we have time for today. We’ll meet you back here again next week for an all-new episode. Until then, this is Paula Felps, reminding you to make every day a happy one. [END]

Follow along with the transcript below for episode: Why Finland Is So Happy With Heli Mende [INTRODUCTION] [00:00:02] PF: Thank you for joining us for episode 414 of Live Happy Now. We've been talking about Finland being the world's happiest country for several years. But this week, we're getting an insider's view on why it's so happy. I'm your host, Paula Felps. This week, I am sitting down with Heli Mende of Visit Finland. She talks about how the country is embracing being named the happiest country in the world for six years in a row. That designation has inspired them to offer a happiness master class, and also has helped Finns realize and appreciate some of the things they had taken for granted. Heli talks to us about happiness, Finland style, including the value of connecting with nature, and importantly, the role that saunas play in the country's overall well-being. Let's have a listen. [INTERVIEW] [00:00:49] PF: Heli, thank you for joining me on Live Happy Now. [00:00:52] HM: Thank you for having me. [00:00:54] PF: I'm so excited to talk to you because we at Live Happy have been talking about Finland for years and, honestly, from the beginning of our existence. So it's so wonderful to be able to talk to someone about happiness and Finland. Why don’t you start by telling us what your position is? [00:01:10] HM: Yes, of course. So I'm working for Visit Finland, which is the National Tourist Board of Finland, and I'm based in New York City. So my responsibility is to promote Finland here in North America. [00:01:22] PF: Well, I think the happiest country in the world makes it a lot easier to promote it. [00:01:26] HM: Yes. It certainly has been helping my job. So every year, we have been waiting to see the ranking. Now, for six years, we have been the happiest country in the world. So it is quite amazing, I have to say. [00:01:39] PF: It’s so interesting because at Live Happy, when we talk about happiness, we're not talking about that euphoric jump up and down kind of happiness. We're talking about overall well-being and a content lifestyle. Would you say that that's what you have in Finland? Or how do you define happiness in Finland? [00:01:56] HM: I would definitely, and I think all my fellow citizens agree with me when I say this. The happiness for us is about being content with your lives, so contentment about your everyday life, about the fundamentals in your own country, about the importance of nature, how we see that as part of our happiness. Those things are. We're quite down-to-earth people in Finland. [00:02:19] PF: Yes. All the Nordic countries do well. Is there a similarity in how you live and how you think that is making those countries all rank so high every year? [00:02:31] HM: Yes. There definitely are lots of similarities between the Nordic countries, and our societies are very similar as well. We have the similar basic fundamentals in place, I mean, in the universal healthcare. Good education system is free for everybody. Low corruption rates and very low numbers of homelessness, for example. So those things are very similar in all the Nordic countries. Of course, Finland has been ranking best in all those indexes now for the past years. [00:02:58] PF: Is there a rivalry between the country? So you go to Sweden and say, “Hey, look. We beat you again.” Or how does that work? [00:03:05] HM: I don't think we really rival about the happiness. I think the rivalry with Sweden is about ice hockey. That’s where it gets quite intense. [00:03:15] PF: Yes. It's probably best to keep it that way, I guess. You don't want to fight over happiness. [00:03:18] HM: No. [00:03:19] PF: So with the countries being so similar, what is it that you think makes Finland keep coming out on top every year? [00:03:26] HM: That is a really good question. I think we Finns are kind of baffled even about this title. Especially during the first couple of years, we're like, “What, seriously? I mean, if we are the happiest, how bad are the other guys doing? Can this be true?” Now, I think after six years, we have sort of learned to believe the results. But we're still kind of trying to contemplate why and what makes us the happiest country in the world. The report is ranking the countries based on certain indexes like said earlier Finland is doing really well in all those indexes. So we just happen to be the best in those. Then they also base the ranking on interviews of the citizens of each of the countries. It seems like also Finnish people are really, really content what they have in our country. So, yes, I can't really tell you any one specific thing. Maybe there are a couple of things that could make the difference. First of all, we have this really, really close relationship with nature, which I know that also the Nordic fellow citizens share. But for us since, it is such a big part of our lifestyle that is so rooted in our thinking. That might be something that we are even more extreme in Finland than in other Nordic countries. I'm not sure. Then we, of course, have the Finnish sauna. [00:04:50] PF: Oh, the saunas. How big of a role does that play in happiness do you think?   [00:04:54] HM: I think it's something that we really take for granted. All of these elements of the Finnish happiness or the indexes that we are ranked by, we take them for granted. So I think during these years when we've been selected as the number one, we have been having to start to think, “Okay, what is the meaning of these? And are these things something that we actually can't take for granted, and some other people in the world don't have?” It’s actually good that we have to think about these things. But sauna is one of those things that we did definitely take for granted, and it is a big part of our lifestyle still, even though it dates back thousands of years ago because our forefathers actually invented the saunas just for practical reasons. They started to build this earth pits that they heated, and those were the warm places to wash themselves in the winter year or months because it was very, very cold, of course. It still is cold in the wintertime. Then evolved into these small huts. First ones were the saunas without any chimneys. They were called smoke saunas. Then came the next version with the chimney with heated stoves and then the electrical. So we have all those still available in Finland. In a country of five and a half million people, we have about three million saunas, which is more than passenger cars. So, yes, I would say that it plays a really big part of our life. [00:06:12] PF: Oh, that's interesting. So how is this sauna used now in Finland? [00:06:17] HM: It's used like it has always been used. I'm based in New York City. But I also have an apartment in Helsinki, where I usually spent my summers, and I have a small sauna in my apartment. So basically, everybody has a sauna in their apartment, in their house, or in their summer house, or both. Hotels all have saunas. Now, we have hotel rooms also with saunas. So there are many ways. Then there are these big saunas for social gatherings. So you can have it as take a sauna as sort of part of your social life. Go for sauna with people you know or with people you don't know in these public saunas. Or you can have your own private sauna, relaxing sauna experience. For me, sauna is part of my relaxation routine and part of recharging myself. I love having my own private sauna moment. I feel that it helps me relieve the stress. [00:07:08] PF: When also it’s one of those things. You can't really be doing a lot of other things at the same time. So it plays into all these other things that lead to contentment, which is slowing your mind down, having some time to decompress and exhale, and just really taking time for yourself. [00:07:24] HM: Yes, exactly. That's very, very much so. [00:07:27] PF: So one of the big reasons I'm talking to you today is after being named happiest country for the sixth year in a row, Finland came up with a fantastic campaign. That is that you're going to offer a happiness master class. I wanted to know how this idea came about. Did you have it in the works before being named the happiest country again, or what's the backstory on doing this? [00:07:50] HM: Actually, before the pandemic, we were thinking about doing something similar, not exactly with this concept. But then pandemic came and then, obviously, it was something that we wanted to postpone and see when the world is in a better place again. Now, we thought that this is the time. Then we were nominated again as the happiest country in the world. So the timing was actually really good. But it has not been easy for anybody, I think, during the past years because of the pandemic and many other things going on in the world. So we thought that maybe this could help some people to think about their own happiness or the contentment of their lives. Maybe there's something that they could maybe find useful of the way we Finns think about things and the way we live. That's why we wanted to showcase this Finnish way of happiness to the world. We have received thousands and thousands of applications. We’re actually quite surprised and thankful of the big number of applications and interest that people have been showing. So it seems like there was a need for this kind of campaign as well. Right now, our team in Helsinki, they are going through all the applications coming from all over the world and evaluating. Then they have this really, really difficult task of selecting 10 persons that will participate in the master class. It will not be easy. [00:09:16] PF: Let me ask you. How do you go from thousands of entrants to get it down to 10? I mean, what are some of the things that they'll be looking for to see who's going to be ideal for this master class? [00:09:28] HM: Yes. That's – I am not – [00:09:29] PF: I wouldn't want their job. I'll just say. [00:09:31] HM: Neither do I. I'm not part of that team that is choosing. But the idea was there that we’re expecting everyone who seriously wants to come to Finland, also participate in that challenge. That was also described in the criteria of this selection. Then the idea is that just the most interesting and insightful application videos will probably stand out best. Then we will make the selection from those persons who have sent the most insightful videos to us. [00:10:05] PF: Then they're going to go to Finland in what month? [00:10:10] HM: In June. In June. [00:10:11] PF: In June? [00:10:12] HM: Yes. [00:10:13] PF: So talk to me about what is the master class going to be like? Because you've got like four different themes that you're working with, and you have, I think, eight different coaches. Can you just talk about what these people are going to experience and learn? [00:10:26] HM: The themes that you mentioned, the four different themes, and nature and fitness lifestyle, then health and balance, food and well-being, and designing everyday life. So there will be sessions with those coaches going on discussing those themes. But not only just discussing, they’re actually experiencing. Because the location where this master class is taking place is in the most beautiful area of Finnish Lakeland near Lake Saimaa, which is one of the biggest lakes in Europe, they will have all the opportunities to test and try these nature activities that we have available and also, of course, the Finnish sauna. [00:11:05] PF: With the coaches, do they also go through some sort of selection process? I mean, did you have a lot of people that signed up that said, “Oh, my gosh. We want to be part of this, and we want to coach.”? [00:11:16] HM: Yes. Well, Finland is a small country. So, of course, we know all the – well, not maybe all of them. But we know well people who we think that could be the most potential coaches for this type of master class environment. But I think there will be some selection process involved with this one as well. The idea is to find inspiring individuals who have a good understanding of working with international participants, and then also showcasing how and what we do in Finland to support the content lifestyle that creates the happiness. [00:11:52] PF: So what does it tell you that you got thousands of responses? Like, one, where you expecting that kind of a response, that big of a response? Then what did it tell you that so many people want to participate? [00:12:04] HM: I think this topic resonates with a lot of people because we didn't expect that it would get sufficient amount of applications. But, of course, this number that we have now been seeing is overwhelming us and in a positive way. We are very thankful about all these applications, but I think this topic resonates. I mean, we have all been through some tough times, and the world is quite a stressful place nowadays. So trying to find the ways how to sort of find your own calmness in midst of all this going on. I think people are really interested in these things. [00:12:41] PF: I would agree with you on that. Do you think having the master class in Finland – you had already mentioned that because Finland has been named the happiest country in the world multiple times that people in Finland are starting to think, “Oh, maybe we've taken things for granted.” Do you think that having the master class there will further make people in Finland go, “Okay, maybe I need to think more about what makes me happy.”? Do you think it'll help build even more happiness in the country? [00:13:08] HM: I hope so. I hope so. Let’s see. [00:13:12] PF: You're going to find out. So now, you were also talking about doing an online version of the class. Do you know yet how that would go? [00:13:21] HM: I think it will be around the same themes. Probably I would guess that we would be then working together with the same coaches that will be working with the participants on this June master class. But like I said, that's also under planning right now. But the idea is that we would be launching that online version of this master class in the fall, after the summer. [00:13:41] PF: That's really amazing. From living in Finland and also living in the US, what do you think the greatest thing that Finland has to teach the rest of the world about happiness is? [00:13:51] HM: First of all, I think we are very like – early, I think I mentioned we are very down-to-earth people, and we are maybe not in front of things that are too complicated. Sometimes, especially here in New York City, I observe things that I feel that could be done in a much more simple way. I think that's one very practical thing, very practical difference. That sometimes frustrates me. It doesn't make me happy when things are too complicated. So I feel that maybe we Finns have found in some ways, at least, the way to do things in a little bit more simple, less complicated way. Of course, I'm just talking at a general level. So there are many details. But some things, yes, I think we have that. Then another thing is that we have this very, very close connection with the nature, like I mentioned earlier. It is not something that I have observed anywhere else. It is so rooted in our lifestyle, and it is such a big part of our happiness. People talk about forest bathing. For us, it's just a very normal part of our life. We go and take a walk in the forest daily because we know that it's good for our blood pressure, and it’s good for our stress. We don't make too much fuss about it. It's just part of the lifestyle that we have. [00:15:15] PF: That's interesting. So most of Finland is very nature-based you’re saying. [00:15:19] HM: Yes, yes. Over 70% of our country is covered with forest. Then we have 188,000 lakes. So there is a lot of water. Plus, we have one of the largest archipelagos in the world with 70,000 islands on our coastal archipelago. Then in the north, we have the Arctic nature in Lapland in the northern part of the country. So we have a huge variety of different type of natural sceneries, 41 national parks. On top of 41 national parks, which are all free to use. We also have the Everyman's Right, which means freedom to roam, which means that you can go walking, hiking, foraging berries, or fishing with a rod, any land, even privately-owned lands. You don't need a permission for that. You can even camp on privately-owned lands, as long as you obey with the rules. Not having open fire or not going too close to private homes. So you can access the nature anywhere and everywhere in Finland. [00:16:19] PF: It also gets quite cold there. So how do you work in your nature, even when it's really cool? Because I know – okay, I'm in the South, in the US. When it gets cold, we all go inside, and we don't leave our house. You get much colder in Finland. So how do you work in nature as part of your daily routine when it is that cold? [00:16:42] HM: We have this saying in Finland that there is no bad weather, just bad clothing. So the weather is not an issue. I observed the same here in New York that when the weather is bad, nobody's moving anywhere. Like why? I mean, what's going on? You just put on weatherproof clothes, and then you go on about your life and good practical shoes. Of course, we don't always look the sexiest when we have these jackets and the weatherproof shoes. But it keeps us warm, and it allows us to continue our lives, even if the weather is not so nice. We don't really – because we're so used to having the four seasons. Weather is what it is. So we don't really spend too much time on thinking about the weather because we can't change it. It's one of those things that you can't change. If you just continue thinking about things that you can't change, then you might be really unhappy as well. [00:17:39] PF: Exactly. Yes. That'll be frustrating. So do you feel like your country is really proud of being named happiest country in the world? Has that helped elevate your self-esteem as a country? Or what has it done throughout the nation? [00:17:54] HM: I think now, finally, after the sixth year or maybe even already during the pandemic when we got the ranking as well of Finnish people, we’re starting to see and think that, yes, there must be something creative about our country as we are getting this ranking. Like I said, we are very humble people. We don't really make much fuss about it. Maybe it just has caused us to think a little bit more about these things that, okay, maybe we shouldn't take everything so for granted. But, yes, like I said, we're very down-to-earth. [00:18:27] PF: Yes. Does it amuse the country that reporters and newspapers are asking, calling people like yourselves? I saw the New York Times had just done a big story where they interviewed like six different people. They're trying to figure out like, “Why are you so happy?” What is that like from your standpoint? [00:18:44] HM: I've been doing actually also quite many interviews now since we got the ranking and since we launched the master class campaign. I enjoy talking about my country and sharing this. Actually, I am also myself kind of learning to think about this in a different way because when I get questions that I never thought myself, again, things that I have taken for granted, I've also started to appreciate much more my country, understanding, okay, we have some things that are not just everyday life for other people. [00:19:17] PF: That’s great. So at the end of this master class that people come and participate in, what do you hope they walk away with? What do you hope happens as a result of them being in Finland and experiencing that? [00:19:30] HM: Yes. I think that's a really interesting question as well because, of course, we are all very different people, and happiness means also different things to everybody. I mean, for us Finns, spending time in the nature is a big source of happiness. But it might not be the case for some other person, although I think that people who don't feel that would probably not apply to the master class and would not come to Finland. So I think most of the people are have applied and those who will be selected would be people who would be appreciating that kind of lifestyle. But I hope that they maybe have found some additional skills, how to cope with the everyday life, how to cope with the stress, and hopefully also find their own way, depending on, of course, where they live and what opportunities they have, their access to nature, and trying to utilize that as part of a stress-relieving factor. But, hopefully, they will find that and also may be thinking about instead of not so much talking about how happy you have to be, but how content can you be with your life. [00:20:38] PF: That's beautiful. Well, Heli, thank you so much for coming on and talking about this. I'm excited to see what happens. I want to stay in touch with you and follow up on this because I'm really excited to see where this goes. [00:20:49] HM: Sounds great. Thank you for inviting me. [END OF INTERVIEW] [00:20:54] PF: That was Heli Mende, talking about why Finland is the happiest country on the planet. We'll be talking more about their happiness master class in the future. In the meantime, if you'd like to learn more about Finland and happiness, visit our website at livehappy.com and click on the podcast tab. That is all we have time for today. We'll meet you back here again next week for an all-new episode. Until then, this is Paula Felps, reminding you to make every day a happy one. [END]

Follow along with the transcript below for episode: How Pets Improve Your Brain Health as You Age With Brittany Derrenbacher [INTRODUCTION]   [00:00:02] PF: Thank you for joining us for episode 409 of Live Happy Now. We know that pets and happiness go hand in hand or maybe hand in paw. But did you know that your pet could also be improving your brain health as you age? I'm your host, Paula Felps. Today, I'm once again talking with Brittany Derrenbacher, a mental health counselor and certified grief and pet loss specialist to talk about how pets can change the way we age. Today, Brittany explains what pets can do to keep our brains and bodies healthy, as well as how we can use our pets to create happiness for the older people in our lives. Let's have a listen. [INTERVIEW] [00:00:41] PF: Brittany, thank you for coming back on Live Happy Now. [00:00:44] BD: Hi. It’s so good to be back. [00:00:46] PF: We have so much to talk about today because brain health, super important for our happiness and our well-being. Now, there's a new study that talks about how pets affect that. But before we get into the pet portion of that, I wanted to find out from you. Can you talk about what the connection is between brain health and cognition and our happiness and well-being? [00:01:08] BD: Yes. So it's kind of like the neuroscience of happiness. I feel like happiness is – it's so difficult to define and measure because it is subjective, right? [00:01:21] PF: Right. [00:01:22] BD: But what I will say on a personal level is that we feel joy in our bodies because of the release of dopamine and serotonin and those two types of neurotransmitters in the brain. Both of those chemicals are heavily associated with happiness. So our brain health, just by virtue of that, is usually linked to our mental health and well-being. That's our happiness. [00:01:48] PF: There you go. What are some of the things that are scientifically proven to improve our brain health and help with our cognition? [00:01:57] BD: Yes. There's a handful of things. A recent study on older adults identified particular habits that are shown to improve cognition in humans and basically slow down the rate of memory decline. Some of those habits are exercising. I feel like these are going to be really self-explanatory, and we will go into those more in-depth. But basically exercising, socializing, healthy eating, no smoking and drinking, brain exercises, things like that, just to name a few. But essentially, what we're saying here is that intellectual engagement, social interaction, physical activity, and having a sense of purpose in our lives slow risk factors for cognitive decline and things like Alzheimer's and dementia. [00:02:47] PF: Interesting. Again, we talk so much here on the show about nature and biophilia. Does that help our brain cognition as well? I mean, I know it makes us feel good, and it really helps us mentally. But does it help with our actual cognition? [00:03:02] BD: I would imagine that it does just by virtue of when we're out in nature, we are living in our conscious mind, rather than our subconscious. So we're really bringing that mindfulness intentionality. We're basically bringing our brain back online. So we're – [00:03:18] PF: I love the way you put it. [00:03:19] BD: Yes. We're actively bringing it back online and bringing it out of autopilot. So there's a lot of power in that. It's building new neural pathways, just by going out into the woods and being more present. [00:03:32] PF: Yes, especially if you get lost in the woods, and you're being chased by someone. [00:03:35] BD: You got to use that big brain. [00:03:39] PF: You got to run. So pets help us in so many ways. When you look at the things that you just mentioned about exercise, well, obviously, they can't help us with not smoking or drinking. But there are several points that they could help us with. Can you explain some of the ways that they're encouraging better physical and mental health for us? [00:03:58] BD: Yes. In one of our last conversations together, we talked about the power of pets in our lives. Not only is pet owning scientifically shown to improve our well-being, our socialization, and decrease stress. Now, through research and data, we can see how pet owning has brain-boosting benefits as well. So this conversation that we're having today really allows us to dig a little bit deeper into those layers and consider the long-term benefits of being a pet owner. I say long term because I feel like a lot of the studies that we're going to be talking about today really explain that it has to be consistent years of pet owning, right? You can't just go out tomorrow and adopt a dog and in a couple of weeks, show all of the benefits, right? So this really has to – [00:04:45] PF: Just like any other health habit, right? [00:04:47] BD: Yes, yes. So this is really a lot of what we're going to be talking about today. I do think it's important to acknowledge that this is about long-term benefits of being a pet owner. It's also like a PSA like, “Go out and get you your animal,” [inaudible 00:04:58], right? What really stood out to me is just how many of the healthy brain habits mentioned earlier are covered by being a pet owner, so exercising, socialization, stress reduction, brain exercises, routine. This really suggests that our relationships with our animals, our companionships with our pets itself can increase connectivity in the brain and become a protective agent against aging. I feel like that's pretty amazing. [00:05:33] PF: Yes. So as if pets aren't doing enough for us. Now, they're slowing down our aging process. So that's – oh, my God. That's amazing. So I wanted to ask you. You mentioned stress reduction. How do pets help reduce our stress? Because sometimes, they are stressors, like when my two guys are like fighting or something like that. But how do they help us? [00:05:54] BD: Yes. First and most importantly, owning pets reduces anxiety and combats feelings of loneliness. So our pets tend to help us self-soothe. They stabilize our nervous systems. That activates oxytocin in our bodies and reduces cortisol level in our brain. So that's what I mean by the stress reduction. So, yes, our animals can stress this out. But our relationship with our animals is so reciprocal that like we're talking about something a little bit bigger here. That this activation of the oxytocin in our bodies consistently and the consistent reduction in cortisol levels in our brains. This is alone known to improve our cognitive health as human beings because chronic stress and anxiety has such negative effects on our brain health. That’s what I see in my field in mental health is that long-term kind of chronic stress that has really built up in our bodies and have a negative effect on our brain health. [00:06:54] PF: That's incredible. One thing you and I had talked about was the study that was recently published in the Journal of Aging and Health, and it specifically focused on people over the age of 65. It was pretty narrow in its focus because not only was it people over the age of 65. It really looked at their cognitive scores and word recall. It showed that people who had pets and had had that pet for more than five years, to your point, it's an ongoing thing. If they'd had a pet for more than five years, they had much higher scores. One thing the study did not show was the cause and effect. So I get so much about what you're saying was stress reduction and helping in that way. Do you have any insight into why that would help with the word recall and that cognition in our brains? [00:07:42] BD: Yes. I want to focus a little bit on the word recall because I think that goes under the category of brain exercise and routine. Pet ownership is so good for working our verbal memory, our memorization in general, orientation to time in place because we're consistently learning how to adapt with our animals and build these kind of new neural pathways through training, right? Through just by virtue of having to take care of them, remembering to feed them, to walk them, to groom them. We have to constantly engage in critical thinking, planning for the future, practicing self-regulation. With patients, you were talking about that, right? With our pets, like for example, I want you to think about how much you have to remember to care for your pets. How much planning and preparation you have to go through just to prepare for a storm. [00:08:39] PF: Yes. In particular, storms take a lot of prep at this house. [00:08:44] BD: Yes. Do you want to talk about that? What do you have to do to prepare for that? [00:08:45] PF: I would love to. We went through it last night. Yes. When we know that a storm is coming in and we don't know, obviously, how bad it's going to be. So it's like we've got to make sure that we've got Josie’s is hemp treat that's going to help calm her down. We make sure that her thunder shirt is nearby. It even affects how we schedule things. If we have a thunderstorm predicted, we might have to change our plans because she really is terrified. You know Josie. You've seen the level of trauma that it creates for her. Last night, we had storms, and we tried something new. We went down into the basement, which is not as horrific as it sounds. It's a finished basement. But we just wanted something that would reduce the sound of thunder because the thunder started. She was shaking. We had her in the thunder shirt. Everyone's huddled together, and it wasn't working. So we go down to the basement. We turned on the television, put on some music that was not going to be jarring for her, and just really did a lot of things to – we were using a lot of brainpower trying to figure out what else we could do to make this situation better, and it did work. Ultimately, it was one of our better storm knights. But, yes, it takes a lot of thought and, as you said, preparation. [00:09:54] BD: That in and of itself is critical thinking. It's memory. It's routine. A huge part of cognitive health in human beings is our structure, is our routine, is our memory. So feeding, exercising, caring for our pets can really help us kind of establish this routine, which it’s just grounding, focusing. It's achieving its purpose. So just these two things alone, the brain exercise and the routine, check so many boxes. [00:10:26] PF: I'll be right back with more of my conversation with Brittany Derrenbacher about how pets can help us age better. But right now, I'm bringing in my friend, Kate Vastano. We recently hooked up Kate and her cat, Kittles, with an amazing cat tree from Mau Pets. Now, we're introducing the adventures of Kittles to find out how it's going. Kate, how are you doing today? [00:10:46] KV: I'm doing great, Paula. Happy to be here with you. [00:10:46] PF: Well, last week, Kittles got the most amazing cat tree. I mean, I was so impressed by the design of this. I actually thought about going out and getting a cat of my own. [00:10:57] KV: Right. The one I got, it's called the Cento, and it is gorgeous. It basically looks like a piece of art, and I'm so happy that I finally found a cat tree that actually makes my home look better inside instead of being an eyesore. It is so modern-looking. It's not an ugly cat tree, which is refreshing. [00:11:15] PF: Yes, it is. It is really, really beautiful. One thing I thought was really cool about it is that every purchase also gives back because five percent of the proceeds are donated to animal welfare and environmental conservation. For every product purchased, Mau Pets plants one new tree. [00:11:31] KV: It’s so beautifully made, Paula. I will never put another ugly cat tree in my house again. It’s just gorgeous. [00:11:38] PF: If you want to upgrade your kitty’s furniture, visit maupets.com. That's maupets.com to check out their amazing selection of stylish, contemporary cat furniture. Now, let's get back to my conversation with Brittany Derrenbacher, as she dives into how pets help improve our cognition as we age. [00:11:56] BD: I'd like to dive into this idea of routine a little bit too and kind of go back to that study about folks that are over the age of 65. I’d like to use my grandma as an example because she's now currently in a memory care facility for Alzheimer's dementia. But about 15 years ago, when she was diagnosed, we knew as a family pretty immediately that we wanted her to have her sense of purpose and routine and structure and stay in her home as long as possible. I can tribute her ability to be able to stay in her home as long as she did because of her cat, Tigger. He was such a huge part of her routine. She might forget my name, and she might forget how to work the coffeemaker that day, but she was not going to forget how to take care of him. [00:12:45] PF: Oh, my gosh. That's amazing. [00:12:47] BD: I truly like – I associate that time that she was able to really stay in her home for as long as she was with that routine that she had with her cat. [00:12:56] PF: That's such an important point because, obviously, you are involved in rescue. You've seen these situations where people are reluctant to adopt another pet because they're of a certain age. To me, that's kind of crushing because, oh, man, they can do so much for you. They would be so helpful. I understand that concern. So can you address it? Because you've dealt with it from both sides, both adopting the pet and then seeing a pet that outlives its owner. So can you speak to that point? [00:13:27] BD: Yes. I think in rescue work and something that I hope that it's not unique that just our rescue does, I hope that other rescues embrace this as well, is that we never turned an elderly applicant down. We would work with them to make sure that they had a support system and that they did have a plan. I feel like having an honest conversation about that is the best way to go into it. Like, “Okay. What would your plan be if you passed? Who would take care of your pet?” So having open conversations like that. But also, like we never ever, ever shamed any families that came forward with animals because of having a family member pass away. An elderly family member passed away or, say, a parent. But the reason that we truly believe that these elderly applicants should not be turned away is because they're the best pet owners. They're the ones that are really focusing all of their time and energy on these pets and giving them everything that they can. Also, it's reciprocal. We know that these animals and these dogs that they adopt are going to add years onto their life. So as long as we can really work with them to have a plan and make sure that like that animal is going to be taken care of or returned to us, we would never turn them away. [00:14:44] PF: Yes. It gives so much just in terms of the socialization because as we age, people are less mobile. They're less able to get out and socialize. Loneliness is a huge problem among older people. Can you talk about that and how the pets can help with that? [00:14:59] BD: Yes. Exercising and socialization is a huge part of this conversation. Exercise is the most underrated antidepressant and it's free, right? [00:15:09] PF: You don't even have to join a gym. Come on. [00:15:10] BD: Yes, it's free. Physical exercise is it increases blood flow and oxygen delivery to the brain. It’s also directly linked to synaptic integrity and especially in older adults. So that strength of communication between our neurons in our body. So if you think about it, you're out walking your dog every day. This is good, consistent exercise. It's movement outdoors. But it also encourages us to meet other people, right? As a dog owner, you stop. You chat with other people. You run into people at the dog park. You're constantly kind of meeting other people. Other pets can really be a part of this conversation too because pet shops, right? You're meeting people, training classes. You're meeting people. Online groups are huge for pet owners. So this is really good socialization for older folks. Dog agility. We've talked about this before. My mom owns a training and agility facility here in Louisville, and a huge part of the population there is older ladies. [00:16:12] PF: Really? [00:16:13] BD: Yes. They’re there with their dogs. They're working on all of the things that we're talking about; exercise, socialization, the brain games really, the constant movement, the stress reduction. They're doing all of those things, just by attending an agility class with their dogs. [00:16:29] PF: So what about someone who has a cat? Cats are – they're active in their own way. How does someone get the benefit of exercise? Obviously, the socialization comes because of the cuddling with your cat. But how do they incorporate exercise into cat ownership? [00:16:46] BD: Yes. Cats are still mobile creatures. You can get up. You can move around. You can be on the floor with them. You can be sitting with them and moving around. I love seeing those little catnip toys and all the – [00:16:58] PF: Ah, the little ones with the stuff on. Yes. [00:17:01] BD: There are games that you can play with your cats. It's not just dogs that have puzzle games. It can be reciprocal with your cats too. Cats love to play games. They're very engaging creatures. I know we have a lot of assumptions, and there's a lot of stereotypes with cats. But cats come second on the list in these research studies for really improving cognition in humans. So – [00:17:22] PF: We have a relative, and she was wonderful with cats. She always had a lot of cats, rescued all these cats. In the last few years, as they died, she did not get any more because she knew that she was getting older. She's now in hospice care. One thing that's been very hard on her is not having animals around. Unfortunately, she's in a facility where you can take your pets. I thought this was amazing because we were in Cincinnati to visit her, and we took our dogs in there. The dogs got up on the bed. She's able to love on them. We talked to her a week or so ago, and she was saying that, yes, they still talk about when Rocco and Josie came to visit. It was such a big thing for them. They've also even had people bring cats in to visit. Talk about it from that perspective. If you know an older person who doesn't have a pet who is no – and loves them. Let's make sure they love the pet. But if you have an older person in your life who doesn't have access to a pet, how important is that to be able to provide that experience for them? [00:18:24] BD: Oh, huge. We've talked about this too on some of our past episodes that there are service animals for everything. That is literally their purpose is to go and bring joy to other people and provide comfort. I hope that it becomes more routine to establish these type of connections in these places. Not only do we, like with Luna Bell’s, love to do that with our animals, taking them into senior living facilities and things like that. I just think it's such a beautiful reciprocal thing to have happen to be giving to someone while also be giving to yourself and be giving to your pet. It's kind of this beautiful, powerful, energetic exchange that's happening. [00:19:05] PF: Yes. What does the pet get out of it? Because I know Rocco and Josie had a great time visiting there because they got so much attention. It took so long to get to her room because every person stopped and wanted to pet the dogs and see the dogs. What does that do for the pets? [00:19:20] BD: That's confidence building, right? [00:19:22] PF: Ah, okay. [00:19:23] BD: Yes. That’s socialization too. That's just expanding joy for them. It's putting them to work. They love that. They love having purpose. So we've talked about that a lot in this episode too. It's not just important for human beings to have purpose. Our animals need to have purpose too. So I think for them to go into these places and to feel joy and build confidence and connection and both give and receive, that's just so powerful for them. It's huge. [00:19:50] PF: So even as an owner, you might decide like this is really something I want to continue doing with the pet and be able to become a service animal that they can visit and see people. How does that increase that bond between you and your pet when you do something like that? [00:20:06] BD: I don't know. I just feel like we're essentially doing some multi-focused empowerment work here by doing that, helping others while helping ourselves while helping our animals. It just builds this beautiful connection of both giving and receiving. I just think there's just such a unique power in that that we don't get in other relationships. [00:20:24] PF: Yes. Yes, that's so true. We know now from the studies and from what you were just telling us that pets are so good for us. Can you talk about how we can leverage that benefit? [00:20:35] BD: Yes. I think that our lifestyle factors plays such a huge role in our brain health. So having this conversation really, it helps us realize, I think, that why wouldn't we be pet owners? Why wouldn't we actively be wanting to pursue these lifestyle shifts to create a better holistic lifestyle for us? I think that genetics do have a role in determining our health and longevity, obviously. But we do have more control over our future than we previously thought. So implementing healthy lifestyle habits can have a major impact. I think pet owning proves time and time again that it checks all these boxes. We talk about intentionality a lot when we're together, and we talk about the human bond a lot, obviously. But I think just the power of knowing that taking care of our pets can so positively change not only the way that we think about ourselves but our mental health, our physical health, our spiritual health, our emotional health. There are so many benefits just from being a pet owner. So it's a constant return in our investment. For a lot of people, the most reciprocal relationship that they will ever know in their life is with their pet. So our relationships with our pets are just consistently filling up our cups and allowing us to experience this love and this bond that really is amazing for our mental health. It fosters resilience, and it empowers us to really thrive and live our best life physically and mentally, cognitively. [00:22:14] PF: Yes. That makes sense because I know when you and I talked about grief, and sometimes people have this after the loss of a pet, they kind of feel guilty because it affected them more than, say, the loss of a parent or the loss of a human in their life. One thing that we talked about is like that pet never judged you. Well, maybe if it was a cat, they did. But like they didn't openly judge you. It didn't cause you harm the way the humans that we love and who love us sometimes do it. [00:22:45] BD: Yes. It’s so much more powerful than we give it credit for in our society. I think it's definitely shifting. These conversations contribute to that shift. But owning an animal, being a pet owner, having the bond with our pets, like this deep bond that is really changing over time so beautifully, it affects us in so many powerful ways. I love like this idea that – I don't know. It's like owning pets is really the holistic health care that we need. [00:23:24] PF: It really is. That's a great way to look at it. It's the month of March. It's our happiness month. You're one of our happy activists. So we're really excited about that, and we thank you for that. But there are also several holidays in March to celebrate our animals. There’s National Puppy Day. There’s Cuddly Kitten Day. There's National Terrier Day, which I know you and I think is a very holy day. There's Respect Your Cat Day. Yeah. I know that's actually a thing. What is your favorite way to celebrate your pets and why? [00:23:54] BD: I love this question. I think my favorite way to celebrate my pets, my dogs is by experiencing life with them, living in the here and now, not taking life so seriously, embracing childlike joy, just literally being with them. Because I think our animals are our best teachers when it comes to joy and loving presence. When we actually stop to lean into that, it can be such a beautiful thing. [00:24:27] PF: I love that. Brittany, thank you for once again coming on and talking about this. We're going to tell people as always how they can find you, how they can learn more about all the work that you're doing, and follow you on all the channels. But thank you so much for sitting down with me today and talking. [00:24:43] BD: Thank you. [END OF INTERVIEW] [00:24:48] PF: That was Brittany Derrenbacher, talking about how pets improve mental cognition across our lifetime. If you'd like to learn more about Brittany and the work she's doing or follow her on social media, just visit our website at livehappy.com and click on the podcast app. Just a reminder that we are still celebrating the month of March with our Happy Acts campaign. Follow us on social media or visit our website to be inspired by a different happy act every day. While you're there, be sure and visit the Live Happy Store to find the perfect shirt that shows the world how you live happy. That is all we have time for today. We'll meet you back here again next week for an all-new episode. Until then, this is Paula Felps, reminding you to make every day a happy one. [END]

Follow along with the transcript below for episode: Celebrate the Women in Your Life with Linda Allen [INTRODUCTION]   [00:00:02] PF: Thank you for joining us for episode 407 of Live Happy Now. We're celebrating International Women's Day this week, and it seems like a great time to talk about how we as women can support one another. I'm your host, Paula Felps, and today we're talking about how we can use this occasion to remind ourselves to celebrate the women in our lives. International Women's Day celebrates the diversity and achievement of women, gender parity, and inclusion, and that begins with how we as women support one another. Today, I'm being joined by Linda Allen, a Texas business woman who has realized that the best way for her to leave a lasting mark on the world is simply to touch one life at a time. She's here to talk about why it's important for us to truly focus on making sure that the other women in our lives feel seen and how she does that in the workplace and in the world. Let's have a listen. [INTERVIEW] [00:00:59] PF: Linda, thank you for joining me on Live Happy Now. [00:01:02] LA: Well, thanks for inviting me. [00:01:05] PF: One reason that I wanted to talk to you is a few months ago, we had a guest on, and she talked a lot about how women really don't have each other's backs and what a big problem it is like not just in careers but in social settings. Honestly, as I was having that conversation, I was thinking about you because you are the antithesis of that, and you're very good at making women feel seen. You make everybody feel seen, but you're very good about acknowledging women and promoting and supporting them. So that's where I really wanted to start is how do you see the world. Do you think that women really are bad about having each other's backs? Or is that your experience? [00:01:44] LA: Trust me. I've had my experiences with maybe the backstabbing or the snide comments. But I don't see it that way, that it's all women are out to get women. Who isn't a little bit jealous? Who isn't a little bit competitive? But that's not the way I see it. I don't see that way at all. I see it as women, we like each other for the most part. I think we're very curious about each other. But sometimes, we don't want to ask questions or we don't want to be supportive because we don't know what to say or how to say it. How will that woman accept it? So that's the way I see it. Maybe I'm a little Pollyanna, but that's okay. I like the way I live. [00:02:23] PF: Yeah. This is – We've got International Women's Day coming up this week, and that's all about inclusivity, equitability, equality. We want that gender parity, and it's important to talk about how we need to start by getting support from other women because it's not that the men – I mean, it's not just that the men need to recognize our value. We as women need to recognize our value and one another's value in our lives. [00:02:50] LA: No. That’s so great. I don't know about you, but I think of a woman's support, for me, is more important than a man’s support. I'm not talking about it in a personal way but in a professional way. Because women, we identify with each other. We know what makes us tick, sometimes what makes us not tick. So when I get a compliment from a female or a supporting comment, that's bigger to me than a man's comment or compliment. [00:03:23] PF: Yeah. That makes sense. [00:03:25] LA: Because I think we know we tick. For a female too, I think about – we struggle. And I don’t wanna put all women in one bucket here. But women are trying to wear a lot of hats. We're trying to be everything to everybody, including to ourselves, and that's a lot of hats. Most men don't try to wear all the hats that we do. We only have one head, but we try, what, like eight hats on at a time? Well, that's ridiculous. Who are we fooling? And it's going to be hard to keep them all on the head at one time. But it's a struggle, and I don't know why women feel like they've got to be superheroes at all times. But, hey, that's the way we're wound, and we are what we are. [00:04:07] PF: Well, is that why you're so diligent about making women around you feel seen? That is just your nature? Where did that come from, and why is that so important to you? [00:04:18] LA: Paula, as much as I hate to admit this, I don't think I've always been this way. But let me tell you how I think I got here. When I was much younger, I always had this idea in life that I wanted to be famous. I didn't know how I was going to be famous, but I wanted to leave this gigantic mark, that when I walk off the face of this earth, I wanted to leave the big mark. So my first career, I was in broadcasting. The reason I wanted to do that was because everybody would know me. Linda Allen's on the air. Linda Allen, Linda Allen. I wanted to be known. I wanted to be relevant. I wanted to be a part of history. I got into that business, and it wasn't what I thought it was going to be. I don't think I was going to leave my mark in that business. So I said, “Okay, what am I going to do to leave my mark?” So I got into corporate America, which was great but something that’s not going to make you famous, leaving that big mark. No matter what big job title I could grow into, I feel good about getting the new job. But then after that, I'd be like, “Did I really make a difference? Am I a part of somebody's story in life?” [inaudible 00:05:25] really. So then I jumped out, and I left corporate America, and I said, “Okay, maybe I can make my story. Maybe I could leave my mark by owning my own business.” So I jumped out. I opened my own business after being in corporate America for a long time, which was a little bit scary. What I've quickly discovered is, don't get me wrong, I do well in my business. So I really feel like where I can leave a mark and be a part of somebody's big life story was with my team members. When you own a small business, you get to know your staff, your team members very well. I really was feeling like I was making a difference in their lives. They would fall into a hole, sometimes. I was able to help them recover because you're never going to be able to climb out of a hole. You need somebody to help you get out of that hole. I was able to help my team members not just be the best at their job, but to help them to make good money, to feel good about themselves, which ultimately helped them be the best mamas if they were females, the best daddies if they’re dads, husbands, spouses, wives. I thought, “Wow, this is where I can really leave a mark in this world and be relevant in life.” So I've been in this business for almost 14 years. I really think, Paula, that's where I made this transition to find. I mean, I'm in the insurance business, and don't get me wrong. That's not a very sexy business. Okay, fine. But it's needed. [00:07:04] PF: But we all need it. [00:07:06] LA: Glad to do it. But that's not going to leave the big mark. But where I leave a mark is with the people that I touch. My staff is a big piece for me. Then if I got – Just I realized I could see the difference I can make in their lives. I started doing with other people. I mean, I would meet people, whether it be come to my house. I'm in a lot of organizations, and I would find ways to build them up. Not just try like, “Oh, your hair looks cute today.” Oh, that’s nice to hear. Don't get me wrong. But I would look for things that I felt I could say or do or contribute to them that I knew would make them feel better that day or perform better, to help them to see their value. Man, I'm going to tell you how I go to bed at night, and I sleep well because I feel like I am truly relevant in this world, and it is the coolest feeling. [00:08:01] PF: What differences do you see in women when you do make them feel seen, when you acknowledge their accomplishments and just the simple fact that they show up on a tough day when they've been up all night with their kids? What difference does it make for them and the way that they move through the world? [00:08:19] LA: I can speak, first of all, to the people that work with me and for me. They come to work some days, and you could just tell they don't want to be here. [00:08:28] PF: We've all had those days, haven’t we? [00:08:30] LA: I mean, sometimes, they look like they don't need to be here either. I love my team. Just by either acknowledging something that's going well, something that can help them with, as little as an extra spring in their step. As cliché as that may sound, it's noticeable. I'll hear them get – As the day goes by, their chatter builds up. The excitement in their voices is better. So I know when they leave here because I'm only eight hours of their day. They got a lot more hours, and they're going to do things and see people. It's going to help them to be possibly better with all their contacts that they make throughout the day. [00:09:13] PF: How does that change them, as they walk out into the world? Have you seen differences in people in terms of like how they start dealing with customers, with their family, things like that? [00:09:24] LA: Oh, 100%. My motto in the office is when you look good, you feel good. When you feel good, you do good. I learned that from a great mentor early, early on in my professional career, and I have made that my mantra and everybody that's ever worked for me. They hear it, they have to live it with me, and it shows. It absolutely shows. The energy is good. I always tell my folks here. I said, “Guys.” I said, “You know, you're going to spend a lot of time in this office and a lot of times with these people that we all work with, me and the customers. You got to make it your best, and you got to attack it as if you own it, just like I do.” It's really cool to watch the way my staff operates because they feel that sense of pride and ownership in the business, in the customers, and the success we have. It’s hard to leave that at the door, which is a cool thing. So they take it out with them. They achieve bigger things at home. They take on board positions with their booster club. They take on new positions in their churches. It's really cool how that just follows them out here when they leave here. [00:10:39] PF: I remember several years ago talking with a researcher named Shane Lopez, and he was talking about work and was saying that if you don't get things to line up for you at work, it's pretty tough to get things to line up outside of work because work is such a consuming big part of your day. So your ability to create an experience where they feel supported, they feel encouraged, they feel happy to be there is changing their life once they leave that office. It's also changing the lives of their kids and family once they get home. I mean, have you ever really sat down and thought about that kind of ripple effect that it has, simply by going to the office with the intention of making everyone feel welcomed and happy and encouraged? [00:11:25] LA: It is amazing when you think about how it multiplies? Absolutely, yes. Because I know if they leave here, and they've had a good day, and they feel valued, and they feel good about themselves, that their kids will have a better night, their spouses, their friends, their other family members. It’s crazy. So I don't touch just nine people. I'm touching nine times eight, probably, and that's powerful. That's just in one day. [00:11:50] PF: That's an incredible reach. I wish more people would stop and think about it that way, where this one interaction is going to change these multiple lives today, and you can get up and do the same thing again tomorrow. That's so much power that we have. [00:12:04] LA: It is. It's really kind of scary sometimes, and then what's sad is we don't actually use that power to build people up. [00:12:11] PF: Right. You had a Facebook post a few months back, and it stopped me in my tracks. It was so powerful, and it was about an encounter that you had with a homeless woman as you were leaving a store. I wondered. It really struck me in such a profound way. Would you talk about that? Would you tell us what that experience was and the outcome of that? Because I thought this was an incredible example of really your kindness and uplifting someone else. [00:12:37] LA: I have to give you a free story because I didn't put this on Facebook. I wasn't having the best day. I was already irritated with the store I was at. Things weren't going the way I thought they should go. So then I walk out to the store, and I say hi to most everybody because that's just what I do. [00:12:57] PF: Right, it is. [00:12:59] LA: When you're in other countries, they think you're a fool, but that's okay. I don't care. So I say hello to this lady, and she didn't have any shoes on. She's pushing a cart. So you could kind of probably determine what her lifestyle is. She looks at me and she says, “I'm better than you,” and she calls me a name, and it wasn't a very nice name. At that very minute, Paula, I was like, I wanted to call her a name back because I thought that was absolutely unnecessary. I'm being nice. I’ve been [inaudible 00:13:32]. But I said, “Nope, that's not the way I roll.” So I just asked her. I said, “So why did you call me a name?” She said to me, “Nobody is ever, ever nice to me.” I said, “So what is it that you need?” I will tell you my first thought. She's going to say, “I need some money. I need food.” You could tell she paused for a minute, and she goes, “You know, I'm homeless. If you couldn't already tell, I'm probably crazy. But I'm happy.” She said, “I just want to be at peace. I want people to leave me alone.” I asked her. I said, “So would you make me a deal? Just make me a simple deal, if I ever, ever see you again.” I think she hangs out in the area that I live in. I said, “Would you just say hello to me next time and not call me a name, and I will show you appreciation and value?” She looked at me, and she reached over, and I'm like, “Oh, here it comes. It wasn’t about to happen.” She gave me a hug. I was a little bit surprised. Then she just walked away. You know what? I thought a lot about her, and it was profound to me as well because I thought, “Oh, my gosh. Did I just put myself in terrible danger right there at the moment?” I cared about making a connection with this woman. But I really thought a lot about her, and I thought she's no different than me, in the sense that we all just want to feel appreciated in some way, and we want to be at peace. That is huge in life. I can't think of anybody, whether you're a female or a male or whatever. Who doesn't want to feel appreciated and be at peace? It was such a cool moment for me. I mean, even when I was talking on Facebook, I teared up because I can't believe that just happened. But it felt so good that I felt like she walked away feeling a little bit better about herself. I thought, wow, what a difference I could have made in her life. I'm just so glad I stopped and even said hello to her and took the time to do it. So I think that's a lot of it. We don't take the time, in most cases, to build people up, to say hello, to acknowledge what their needs are. We just are too busy with our own space. [00:15:47] PF: How do we really start adjusting our mindset to be more about supporting other people, even if it's strangers, even if it's women that we don't know? [00:15:57] LA: I think for me, and I'm a really big believer on a couple of golden rule type things, you get what you give. As I just said, how many people – We all want to feel valued. We all want peace. If we give that off to other people, if we give that feeling, those emotions to other people, we have a greater chance that we're going to get that in return. So that's part of the way I think we can be more, I guess, present, if we think about what it is that you want because karma will tell you, if you get it, you're going to get it back. [00:16:37] PF: So be careful what you give away. [00:16:38] LA: Exactly. So I live like that. I feel like if I give you something, I may get it back. Maybe it's a feeling. Maybe it's a thing. To me, that has made such a difference of getting this mindset really, I guess, kind of locked in for me. [00:16:58] PF: Let me ask you. I know when you start practicing gratitude, your mind then gets used to looking for things to be grateful for. There are so many cases where when you start focusing on something, your mind automatically does that. Do you find that is true with you now, where you are constantly looking for the good in someone? [00:17:15] LA: You know, I do. I absolutely do. Sometimes, you got to look. I mean, sometimes, you have to really be more mindful of what people are doing. But that's a big part is get out of your head and look out of what's going on around you. [00:17:30] PF: Are there any daily practices that you use to keep your positive mindset? I mean, I don't know that I've ever seen you without a smile on your face. You are always so positive and so filled with joy. So are there practices that you do on a daily basis to keep yourself in that mindset? [00:17:48] LA: I pause and just reflect on the day before. I am a very spiritual person, so I do believe that good things come to those who do good things. So that definitely drives me as well. [00:18:00] PF: I love it. Linda, you are a delight, as always, to talk to you. I appreciate you coming on the show and just chatting with me for a while. [00:18:08] LA: You are so welcome. And you as well are a delight, so it was my honor to be in your presence. [END OF INTERVIEW] [00:18:19] PF: That was Linda Allen, talking about International Women's Day and how we can support and encourage the women in our lives. Now, International Women's Day isn't the only thing that we're celebrating in March. This is also our month for celebrating happiness with simple daily actions that we call Happy Acts. Visit our website or follow us on social media to discover new happy acts that you can do every day to make your world a happier place. Of course, we'd love to have you celebrate the International Day of Happiness with us on March 20th by hosting a happiness wall in your home, office, church, or school. To find out more, just visit our website at livehappy.com and click on the Happy Acts tab. That is all we have time for today. We'll meet you back here again next week for an all-new episode. Until then, this is Paula Felps, reminding you to make every day a happy one. [END]

Follow along with the transcript below for episode: Making Time for Kindness With Dr. Michelle Robin  [INTRODUCTION]   [00:00:02] PF: Thank you for joining us for episode 386 of Live Happy Now. World Kindness Day is just a month away, but there's no reason not to start observing it right now. I'm your host, Paula Felps. And this week, I'm joined by Dr. Michelle Robin, Founder of Small Changes Big Shifts, the Big Shifts Foundation, and the 31-Day Kindness Campaign. Launched in 2019, The Kindness Campaign is a free inspirational email adventure that begins October 14th. When you sign up, you'll receive a daily email suggesting an act of kindness that you can do that day. Michelle is here today to explain why kindness is so good for our wellbeing, how the campaign came about, and what it can do for you. [INTERVIEW] [00:00:47] PF: Robin, thank you so much for coming back on Live Happy Now. [00:00:50] MR: Thank you for having me. I love the mission. [00:00:53] PF: Oh. Well, I love your mission, and it aligns so well with everything that we do at Live Happy Now. So you've got a wonderful campaign we're going to talk about, but I've got to know, why is kindness your jam? Like why is it such a hot thing for you, and how did you get so involved in it? [00:01:09] MR: Well, it's kind of a funny story. So my background’s around wellbeing. I’ve been around the space about 40 years. As I replay my life, which you tend to do the older you get, you got to kind of see where people have enriched your life. So in my second book, The E-Factor: Engage, Energize, Enrich, I really talk about getting engaged in the wellness journey, and then you have more energy. Then once you do that, you try to just enrich. So part of my mission right now is to enrich other people's lives and make an impact. As a kid, my mom was married four times. By the time I was 17, I had a little bit of sexual trauma and a little bit of alcoholism trauma, and just really didn't feel like I mattered, especially to the people that you think you should matter to. But by the grace of God or universe, there are people that came along in my life that were kind to me. You don't really see it until you can reflect older and realize what has happened and what has sustained you through some of those tough moments. But this Kindness Campaign is pretty funny. One of my friends, Ann Koontz, who's in our wellness movement in Kansas City, she's a mental health advocate. I happen to be working with her daughters when they were teenagers about 15 years ago, and she knows that I have other online programs that we do around sleep and around posture. She said, “You know what? You really need it.” You know when somebody says, “You really need to do something around kindness. You need to do a 21-day kindness program.” Paula, I don't know about you. But sometimes, it's like, “Really, you want me to do one more thing. I'm already running a practice. I'm running a movement. I do a podcast. I've got seven books.” [00:02:37] PF: Like, “Sure. Let me just tack that on to my to-do list.” [00:02:40] MR: One more thing, it happened to be the fall of 2019. Thank God that she kept insisting that I do something. She said, “I'll even help you. But we need to start it, and we need to end it on World Kindness Day with Lady Gaga’s movement.” I said, “Okay, Ann. You win.” She kind of wore me down. I believe in being kind. I'm the person that holds the doors for people. That's just kind of who I've become. Interesting enough, I talked to one of my friends, Dr. J. Dunn, and she's a genetic specialist, and she said, “Michelle, you actually have the kind gene.” Some people actually have this kind gene, which is pretty fascinating. So that was put inside of me, and then Ann kind of poke the bear. Then we know what happened in March of 2020. Thank goodness, we'd already built The Kindness Campaign. [00:03:22] PF: Let’s go back to that for a minute. When you talk about the kindness gene, one, if there's people out there saying, “Oh, crap. I don't have it,” let's talk about how they can develop this like a muscle. But what is that? What do you think that does, the kindness gene, and how does that change how you're interacting in the world versus how someone else might interact in the world? [00:03:42] MR: Yeah. We all have a genetic roadmap called the genome, and that genome has different – I like to call it divisions. So like if you were, let's say, in a Walmart or a Target, they have different divisions. They have a toy division, and they have a home goods division, and they have a food division. They may have an auto division. Well, you have these different divisions in your body that make your systems work because we're chemistry. We work because of chemistry, right? Those divisions sometimes have hiccups, whether it's in the way your liver detoxes or in the way your body – In my case, I have a vitamin D receptor defect, and so my body has trouble keeping my vitamin D up. So I have to work really hard at that. It could be where I have trouble with the thyroid genes. It could be where I have trouble with the genetics that go along with neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine. I mean oxytocin. So what we have found out through the work of, especially, Dr. J Dunn, who's a chiropractor by training as well, but she specializes in kinesiology, in genetics. So there's a way to start to, in a sense, hack the genes in a positive way through chemistry, not necessarily pharmaceutical. Sometimes, that's necessary, but more through the right supplementation because those – I think about them as wheels. Those cogs in the wheels move because of chemistry, whether it's a cofactor like vitamin D or a B vitamin or B12 or B6 or magnesium or calcium or boron, whatever type of maybe nutritional supplement. For myself, personally, I got my genetic genome. The cheapest way to do it is through someplace like Ancestry. There's some places that don't give other people access because they're not owned by Big Pharma. Then I have a functional medicine doctor who practice kinesiology that will actually help test through and compare to my blood work what I can be doing. So some of us have this cup half full, and some of us have a cup half empty. If it's half empty, you got to work really hard to make it full. Paula, for me, I suffer from anxiety, and I believe after caring for people for 30 years that most people have a level of anxiety. Some people manage it through music. Some people manage it through medication. Some people manage it through alcohol. Some people manage it by maybe playing a video game. For me, I actually manage it by being a connector. That's probably one of the biggest ways I manage my anxiety is be of service for people. [00:06:06] PF: That's so interesting because your mission and kindness has been – You've created something so incredible and so big. It started with your Big Shifts Foundation. Can you talk about what that is? Then we'll get into The Kindness Campaign. [00:06:20] MR: Sure. Big Shifts Foundation is a foundation to make generational change for 30 and younger. You can say, “Michelle, why 30 and younger?” Think about a pond. If a pond has a bunch of dirty fish, you probably don't want to be fishing in that pond, right? Because you don't want toxicity. [00:06:35] PF: That's a great point. Yeah. [00:06:37] MR: So if you have a child who has autoimmune disease, anxiety, depression, maybe some cancers and allergies, how could you clean up their pond because their pond got toxed out? In our medicine, we believe people are sick because of two reasons. They're toxic or they're deficient. Toxic in, let's say, gluten. Deficient in vegetables. Toxic in hate. Deficient in love. Toxic in medications. Deficient in the right supplementations. Toxic in sitting around, being an office potato too much, versus movement. So the foundation's job is to really pour into young people, ideally, before they have babies, so we can clean up their pond. Because our parents, they did the best they could. If you really look at our parents did the best they could, but their training was by – In my case, my grandparents and my great grandparents and my great, great grandparents. Sooner or later, you go back to evolution and whatever your beliefs are. Something got messed up. Because as we talked earlier on a previous show is that we innately are pretty designed to be well. Some people come in with a few hiccups, but innately we come in. We're happy. We're cooing. We have this ability to bring smiles to some of the hardest people as a little baby, and then something changes, and what is that that changes? Is it the thoughts we were told? Is it the food we're fed? Is it that we sit on a device too long? Is it that we're not sleeping because we're scared? So the foundation's job is to pour into young people to help them realize that they were designed to be loved, and they're designed to be well. So we teach them about posture, we teach them about sleep habits, and we teach them about labs. We actually do their functional medicine. As I'm sitting here, one thing that we've not done yet, this will be our third year doing a scholarship program with them, is we've not talked about their genetics. So I'm going to add that to the program. We have a six-month discovery program where they get to go to therapy, and they get functional medicine, blood work, and they get a wide membership, and they get to get massage and acupuncture and chiropractic. We just love them. Or they get Reiki. Can you imagine being an 18 to 25-year-old? Some 18 to 30s are arranged for our scholarship program. All of a sudden, you have a bucket of money to really take care of yourself. They do they do the Hoffman weekend experiments. Experience was really how do you start to heal your heart for some of the bullying you've had done too. [00:09:01] PF: That’s so important because I've been doing some research. I just did a report on Gen Z and how different they are. This generation, more than any previous generation, is interested in mental health. They're concerned about their wellbeing. They will put their mental health above a work situation. It’s like they're not going to tolerate some of the things. I think it's such a huge generational shift. The fact that you're giving them the tools to be able to do some of these things is really going to help propel that forward. [00:09:34] MR: I think the word – When you look up the dictionary wellbeing, it means happy. I think people want to be happy, and it's hard to be happy when you have a bellyache, or you have a headache, or you are nervous of what somebody's saying about you, or you're in pain. So how do we help them really make that shift to be happy? It's a super fascinating time that these young people are forcing us to really look at mental health, and they're forcing parents to really identify and think, “You know what? I've had depression my whole life, and I've not sought help for it.” So it's time. There are so many tools to living your best life that don't cost a lot of money. Of course, some do. But there's a lot that don't. Being kind is one that doesn't cost a lot of money, getting sleep. But how do you do – I mean, I understand that some people don't feel safe enough to sleep. So how do we try to address that? But for the average person, at least in America, we can put down our device. We just don't. [00:10:27] PF: Yeah. Right. We’re connecting. [00:10:28] MR: So there's all those little things that we can do to try to help ourselves, and that's what we're on a mission to do. We're on a mission to reach a billion people that the small changes they can do can lead to big shifts in their life and that our foundation, Big Shifts Foundation, ultimately, is really how do we help 30 and younger, not that we don't want to help the people that are older. I mean, this campaign is for everybody. But we do know that if we change a person before they have kids, they change their genetic makeup for the future generations, and it's going to take 2.5 generations to change what we're in right now. We can do it inch by inch, wellness is a cinch. [00:11:03] PF: I love that. Absolutely love that. So let's talk about The Kindness Campaign. 31 days and it's not a challenge. Tell us why it's a campaign, not a challenge. [00:11:12] MR: Yeah. So one of our friends here in Kansas City came to me. One of our corporate clients said, “Okay, Michelle. We've talked about building rhythm and resilience through this whole thing called COVID.” I know resilience is kind of a buzzword for people, but the word I was hearing when this came on like COVID, and I've heard before, even when I had a bad accent is, “Michelle, you got to develop a rhythm or consistency so that you can have resilience.” To me, resilience – I know a lot of people are super resilient, but it's hard to be resilient when you are dehydrated. It's hard to be resilient when you are having irritable bowel syndrome and just like I talked about being happy. So they came to me and said, “Michelle, you know, we're at August of 2020. We know mental health is at all time high right now. What do you think we should do?” Who wants to hear how to not to have anxiety? That doesn't sound like a great class to go to, right? Not that we all don't need it, but I said, “Well, you know what? We have this Kindness Campaign.” In the back of my mind, I'm thinking, “That Ann hounded me about doing it.” “Why don't we do that?” They said, “Yes. But we don't want it 21 days. We want it 31 days.” They actually made that call because we used to do our online programs for 21 days. They said, “Because we are in this nasty 2020 election cycle,” like we're in a nasty 2022 election cycle and the 2023 and 2024, probably, they wanted to overlap that. But I wanted to end on World Kindness Day. That's important to me. [00:12:27] PF: I love that. [00:12:28] MR: So that's what we did, and they helped us take it around the world. We just have grown it, and another company helped us take it last year around the world. Then we went on a listing tour to some of the schools, and they said to my team, they said, “You know what? We love what you're doing. But can you make it more specific for kids? Because kids are really suffering.” They said, “Can you not only make it? But can you make us a curriculum for the whole year?” We said, “What we can do this year is we can make a specific deck. So we have seven kindness acts for elementary, seven for middle and seven for high school. Then we have the 31-day deck and campaign for anybody who wants to do that. So we said okay. So we thought, “Well, wait a minute. This fits with our foundation's mission.” The reason why it started is that's why once again and kind of kicked it off. Then some other corporations got behind us. Now, we have 11 sponsors. [00:13:24] PF: So tell me how this works. People sign up, and then what happens? [00:13:28] MR: Go to bigshifts.org, bigshifts.org\kindness, and you can just sign up right there. Then all of a sudden, on October 14th, you're going to get an email that says, “Hey, Paula. Thanks for joining us. Here's what this is about.” We have this fun thing that my team – I've got a great creative team, Desiree and Zach. They said, “You know what? Why don't we give people an opportunity to kind of keep track of which ones make them feel the best?” Because I believe we all have medicine inside of us, that the creator put medicine in me that says, “Michelle, you're able to be a connector.” Paula, it may say that you have a singing voice. I don't have a singing voice. Or you have a writing voice, right. So you're a good writer. I personally am not a great writer. I have great ideas and thoughts. But sometimes, I forget even how to spell the – So that's not my skill set. But I do believe that once we start practicing these acts of kindness, that we’ll realize, “Well, wait a minute. I am really great at this act,” and that we start to realize that's one of our secret sauce. That's some of the magic that makes us who we are in the medicine. So you're going to get an email every day for 31 days. That's going to say, “Hey, here's an act of goodness today.” If it feels right to you, execute it. Why we called it a campaign is people were already challenged. We don't want people to be challenged more. We want them to be inspired that they can not only shift their lives but they can shoot somebody else's. [00:14:49] PF: I love that. So what are some examples of the kind of acts of kindness that’ll get recommended? [00:14:54] MR: Well, it could be smile at somebody. [00:14:55] PF: That’s an easy one. We can do that. [00:14:57] MR: That's an easy. It’s easy. It could be to wave at somebody in the car next to you. We all have on our forehead an MFI, make me feel important, and we just want to want to know we matter. Last year, we got a chance to talk to the YOU Matter team, which was fabulous. This gal actually had signs in her car that she had put on boards, and she had pulled them up. “Hey, nice smile,” or, “Nice color of car,” whatever that would be. Or, “You matter.” It could be that you write a note to a friend, maybe a snail mail or a card. It could be where you send a text to somebody and say, “Hey, I'm thinking of you.” So many little tiny things, and I'm excited to see what people love, and I want to hear new ideas, so we can continue to always freshen up the content. [00:15:38] PF: I love that. So you're a health practitioner. So what is it that you see about kindness that is so crucial to our overall wellbeing? [00:15:48] MR: That is a wonderful question. I want to tell you, I would not have known that answer four years ago. [00:15:53] PF: Really? [00:15:53] MR: I would not have known it. I mean, I would have intuitively known it was good for you. But I would not have known the science behind it, probably much like the work you do with Live Happy Now, you find out the science. This is a soft skill. But this is a soft, soft skill that the research and the science proves is beneficial. So the science shows that by doing kindness to yourself, for yourself, or your pets. I’m a dog person too. I know you are too. Or somebody else, it changes your neurotransmitters. We talked about neurotransmitters just a little bit, but you've got the oxytocin which is what helps you feel like you belong. We do know that people are disconnected more than ever, and they don't feel like they matter, and they're lonely. So people want to matter, and they want to feel like they belong. Then it also – You've got the serotonin and the dopamine that'll give you some motivation and also just help your brain think more positive. So kindness actually shifts those brain chemistry. It is a natural drug to shift your mental health, and it's one of the greatest tools you can use. [00:16:54] PF: Let’s talk about what's going on in our brain when we start practicing kindness. What is that – How is that changing the way that we think? [00:17:03] MR: Well, you think about a couple things. You think about there's something in the brain called the amygdala, and the amygdala helps control the anxiety control centers in the adrenal glands. If you're able to help down regulate that, so instead of kind of – You know when you have caffeine, and you've had nothing else, and you've had maybe three cups of caffeine too much, and you're jittery, and you're kind of on edge. So kindness kind of takes that down a notch. [00:17:26] PF: Then as we start practicing it, how does it then become part of our daily being? Because it is kind of – You and I have talked about this. It's not – I wouldn't say it's addictive, but it does become a pattern if you do it consistently. [00:17:41] MR: I think people start to pay attention. Once again, sometimes it's harder for young brains to get that. Under 25-year-olds, they don't see the patterns yet. But as you get more age, you get more wisdom, and you start to see the patterns, happiness and kindness, if you start to just practice those tools on a regular basis. Sometimes, people forget. I have moments where I forget. I wouldn't say I had days I forget. But sometimes, I get tripped up maybe to an old pattern of some of those negative thinking that we all have. The committee that gets tripped up and you're like, “Gosh, where did I go from there?” I can almost pinpoint the minute where I'll be like, “Michelle, at 10:00 AM, you were fine. And at 10: 20, you weren't fine. What happened between 10:00 and 10:20 AM? Did you forget to eat today? Did you get a phone call that you're processing, and you're thinking it's the end of the world?” So I believe for myself that the more I practice this lifestyle. To me, kindness is a lifestyle. [00:18:38] PF: I like that. Yeah. [00:18:38] MR: Eating vegetables is a lifestyle. Moving is a lifestyle. Listening to positive music is a lifestyle. Reading affirmations is a lifestyle. So when you practice this lifestyle, you have more life in you to share with the world. [00:18:53] PF: Then how do we remind ourselves even after the campaign ends? How do we kind of remind ourselves to make this part of our daily routine? [00:19:01] MR: Well, it could be you printed off a few of the ones that you absolutely love that really spoke to you. Once again, I believe we all have medicine inside of us, and that is what was planted inside your soul for you to find. That is your gift for the world. I don't know what it is, and I hope that people will find something in this campaign that they say, “Oh, wow. That is it. That is what gives me juice and gives me jazz.” So you might post it. We’re seeing each other live by camera right now, and other people are listening to us. But I'm looking to my right, and I know you probably see me look to my right occasionally. I have a board over here to my right in my studio, and it says, “Thank God for this moment.” Underneath it, I have some affirmations, but I also have some of my people in my community that have poured into me. So when you say, “What's my why,” this kind of can be, “I am just pouring it back to the world.” Because people have cared enough to pour it into Michelle Robin, this young woman who, to be totally transparent, is living the best life she could have ever imagined because people poured into me. I wasn't meant to succeed. I wasn't – I grew up poor. I grew up abused like a lot of people. For some reason, I'm sitting, and I have a home, I have a car, I have my health, and I've got community. It doesn't get much better than that. So I think that if you start to plant stuff around you to remind you, “Oh, you know what? Today's the day or this moment I could choose another way to be.” I could be grumpy at that person who pulled out in front of me, or I can bless them. I could send them love. That's – I think it just becomes who you are, almost moment to moment. [00:20:38] PF: I love that. Thank you so much for all the work that you're doing and for sitting down with me today and talking about it. [00:20:45] MR: Well, thank you for getting behind the movement. Like I said, I love what Live Happy stands for, Live Happy Now. I love following your show. You have brought on some really insightful guests through the last 380-some episodes. That – [00:20:58] PF: Yeah. Number 386 right here. [00:21:01] MR: The last 386 episodes. It matters, and you just don't know what a person's life is tuning in today that’s going, “Wow,” that maybe make a different decision, and maybe it's to stay alive. [00:21:12] PF: That’s terrific. Thank you again. [END OF INTERVIEW] [00:21:18] PF: That was Dr. Michelle Robin, talking about the 31-Day Kindness Campaign. If you'd like to learn more about Michelle, sign up for The Kindness Campaign, or follow Michelle on social media, visit our website at livehappy.com and click on the podcast tab. That is all we have time for today. We'll meet you back here again next week for an all-new episode. And until then, this is Paula Felps, reminding you to make every day a happy one. [END]