A stack of crumbling cookies

Can Mindfulness Work on Your Waistline?

I’ll admit I was skeptical when I began reading The Joy of Half a Cookie: Using Mindfulness to Lose Weight and End the Struggle with Food. If the book had been called “The Joy of Half an Avocado” or even “The Joy of Half a Slice of Cherry Pie,” I wouldn’t have been so dubious. But who can eat half a cookie? Still, Jean Kristeller, Ph.D., the author of the book, is not to be dismissed lightly. A professor emeritus of psychology at Indiana State University, she is the creator of the NIH-funded Mindfulness-Based Eating Awareness Training (MB-EAT). She’s been studying meditation and people’s experiences around physical hunger, fullness and the pleasures of taste for decades. Part of what has driven Jean has been her own issues around compulsive overeating. While most of us would not mind losing a few pounds, my motivation in reading this book wasn’t primarily weight loss. Rather I wanted to learn how to hit that sweet spot of satiety: enjoying every bite of what I’m eating without crossing the line to being overly stuffed. I wanted to avoid food hangovers: the grogginess, lethargy and headache that I experience after a night of too much sugar, fat and salt. An introduction to mindful eating You won’t find a list of forbidden foods, daily menu plans, calorie counts or recipes in this book. What you will find are the tools that help you “tune in to your own hunger experiences” and begin your journey toward mindful eating. The starting point is the “Keep It Off Checklist.” (You can download the checklist at MB-EAT.com.) This helps you recognize where you are today in your relationship with food, guides you to make small shifts toward “a more mindful style of eating” and to “notice and celebrate your growing self-awareness.” By filling out this checklist weekly, you’ll document how often you eat mindfully (“I stopped eating when I noticed I wasn’t tasting the food as much”), as well as those times when you’re eating without awareness (“I overate after feeling upset about something”). The Joy of Half a Cookie is filled with practices that will help you make healthier choices around food with fewer struggles. Here are two key exercises: Be mindful of physical hunger Pick a time of day when you’re likely to be somewhat hungry; say, a few hours after your last mealtime. Follow your breath in and out bringing your awareness to your body. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being as hungry as possible and 1 being not at all hungry, assess your hunger. Now, consider the physical sensations that led you to the number you chose. A feeling of emptiness? Stomach growling? Lightheaded? Be aware of other triggers that may be fueling a desire to eat or a specific food craving. Are you anxious or blue? Are you sitting in a restaurant or at your kitchen table? In front of the TV? Over time, with exercises like this one, you’ll be able to tell the difference between physical hunger and other urges to eat, like stress or boredom. Then, Jean says, “you’ll be able to use this information to help you decide whether to eat, how much to eat, and whether to continue eating.” Cultivate taste Choose a chocolate food that you like but isn’t your absolute favorite; say, supermarket brownies rather than the to-die-for ones from your favorite bakery. (If you’re one of the rare people who doesn’t like chocolate, pick another snack food.) 1. Place a medium-sized brownie or large cookie in front of you. 2. Cut it into four or five bite-sized pieces. (Four Hershey’s Kisses can work, too.) 3. Close your eyes and relax with a few deep breaths. 4. Opening your eyes, place a piece of chocolate in your mouth and chew it very slowly, savoring the taste. 5. Continue to eat the small pieces of chocolate slowly and mindfully. Pay attention to when the flavor and satisfaction begin to decline. After the fourth piece, decide whether you want to continue eating. 6. If you do decide to eat another piece of chocolate, ask yourself why. Are you still finding the chocolate pleasurable? Or, are you “chasing the flavor, seeking to experience the first bite that is no longer in your mouth”? As you cultivate taste awareness, you’ll likely find that the fourth or fifth bite isn’t nearly as satisfying as that first bite. That’s because, Jean says, “our taste buds are capable of experiencing and registering flavors fully for only a short period of time.” If you carefully pay attention, she says, you’ll be surprised to find how quickly “taste satiety” sets in and satisfaction drops. Last night I tried a slightly different experiment with two small scoops of vanilla ice cream, which I ate slowly and mindfully, topped with strawberries and fresh mint. Instead of heading to the freezer for seconds, as I’m usually tempted to do, I placed my bowl in the dishwasher with no regrets and no guilt. Shelley Levitt is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles and an editor at large for Live Happy.
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7 Books You Need to Make Love Last

7 Books You Need to Make Love Last

You’ve heard the cynical takes on romance: Seven-year itch. Marriage is hard. Men are from Mars. Relationships take work. Lots of marriages end in divorce. But don’t throw in the towel on love. Strong, committed relationships make people happier and can even help you live longer. These seven books—your love homework—will help you tune up, spark or overhaul your relationship. 1. Emotional Fitness for Couples: 10 Minutes a Day to a Better Relationship By Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D. Why wait until a crisis happens to fix your relationship? Instead, discover the small things you can do every day to improve emotional fitness. Just like exercise, what you do every day matters a lot more than what you do once in a while. Discover how to date your partner again and how to stop a fight before one even starts. 2. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide From the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert By John Gottman, Ph.D., and Nan Silver Renowned relationship expert John Gottman has studied the habits of married couples for decades, and knows what it takes to make a marriage work. He also knows the warning signs of a failing marriage. In this book ,he identifies the seven principles that guide couples to a harmonious, long-lasting relationship. Discover new ways to resolve conflict and achieve greater levels of intimacy. 3. The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts By Gary Chapman If there were a bible of love, this #1 New York Times Bestseller would be it. You’ve got falling in love mastered, but this book shows you how to stay in love for the long haul. Discover how to speak each other’s love language so your partner feels loved. Is it through physical touch? Quality time? Words of affirmation? Oftentimes we mistakenly express love in the way we feel it but not in the way our partner does. 4. Emotional Intelligence 2.0 By Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves It’s not all beachside romantic dinners for two. Increasing your self-awareness or your emotional I.Q. can improve the quality of your relationship. Deal with your emotions effectively and creatively to have a better relationship with your partner and with yourself. Learn lots of tips to up your E.Q. in these four intelligence skillsets: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and relationship management. 5. Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs By Emerson Eggerichs Crack the communication breakdown between men and women by going back to the fundamentals—women want to feel unconditional love and men want to feel respected. Disrespectful or unloving words can erode a good relationship. Use practical tips and reminders like “be a friend to your spouse” to reignite your emotional intimacy. 6. Bulletproof Your Marriage: Identifying the Five Stages of a Marriage and How They Impact the Communication and Success of the Marriage By Regina Partain Make your marriage the best it can be and feel hopeful about your relationship once again by enhancing your communication and stepping up your intimacy. Positive communication can protect your marriage from the inside out. Prevent misunderstanding and resentment and get armed with love. 7. Couple Skills: Making Your Relationship Work By Matthew McKay Find out how to accept your partner’s feelings and your own without judgment. This "Acceptance and Commitment Therapy" approach has successfully helped many couples enhance their intimacy and open up the lines of communication. Decide what you truly value in your relationship and then commit to acting in ways that support those values. Sandra Bienkowski is a contributing editor for Live Happy.
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Grit book by Angela Duckworth

Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance

For almost 40 years, the field of positive psychology has shown that cultivating certain character traits (including optimism, gratitude and mindfulness, to name a few) can lead to a happy and fulfilling life. Got grit? The latest strength to emerge from the field comes from the compelling research of Angela Duckworth, a professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania. In her first book, Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, Angela makes a strong case for grit. Whether you want to become the boss, run a marathon or become a chess grandmaster, passion and perseverance—not innate talent—will make the difference. “ ‘She’s a natural!’ or ‘He’s a born athlete!’ we like to say about those who seem to excel effortlessly in their fields, but our love affair with ‘natural’ ability distracts us from the real work it takes to achieve greatness,” Angela says. How does she know? Growing up with a father who repeatedly told her she was “no genius,” Angela sought to impress him with tenacity instead. With degrees from Harvard, Oxford and the University of Pennsylvania (where she studied under Martin Seligman, Ph.D.), she did more than that: She created the hypothesis for a revolutionary line of research. The Beast Barracks test Fortitude, commitment and good old-fashioned practice—in a word, grit—trumps whatever aptitudes our genes gifted us with. Her most cogent proof involves new cadets at the U.S. Military Academy at West Point. Less than 10 percent of the applicants—all top academics and athletes—make the cut. Yet, one in five cadets ends up dropping out, many during the initial seven-week training program called “Beast Barracks.” To determine who drops out and why, Angela administered her Grit Scale to 1,218 new cadets at the start of the grueling Beast. By the end, 71 dropped out. SAT scores, IQ, grades and physical fitness had nothing to do with which cadets lasted. What mattered was grit. Those who scored lower on the Grit Scale were more likely to quit than those who scored higher. Angela went on to replicate her findings among other achievers by studying the grittiness of Green Berets, top salespeople and Scripps National Spelling Bee contestants. Paragons of grit Peppered with anecdotes about dozens of “paragons of grit,” as Angela calls them—including best-selling author John Irving, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos and Seattle Seahawks football coach Pete Carroll (who nearly steals the book with his resolutely gritty philosophy of competition)—Grit inspires. The paragons have several things in common: They’re passionate about what they do; they find purpose that goes beyond themselves; they see setbacks as learning opportunities. “To be gritty is to fall down seven times, and rise eight,” Angela writes. That odds-defying optimism not only makes gritty people the most successful but the happiest, too. Parts of Grit can feel a tad plodding, like an exercise in how many ways you can say “practice makes perfect,” but the book as a whole leaves a freshly motivating impression. Besides, it’s not just practice, but “deliberate practice” that counts. Angela shows how to set “stretch goals” for yourself, commit yourself every day and continually evaluate your progress. Grit proves that there are no shortcuts to success and fulfillment but shows that the long road is more exciting and satisfying anyway.
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Child with gears coming out of her head.

Your Brain Is a Mess—and That’s a Good Thing!

As scientific director of the Imagination Institute and a researcher in the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania, Scott Barry Kaufman is known for his work on intelligence and creativity. In his new book, Wired to Create: Unraveling the Mysteries of the Creative Mind, Scott and co-author Carolyn Gregoire explore the habits and techniques that can help us tap into our creative sides. Live Happy contributor Suzann Pileggi Pawelski recently sat down with Scott to learn more. Live Happy: In Wired to Create, you talk about creative people having “messy minds.” What does that mean? Scott Barry Kaufman: When you look at the lives of lots of creative people and look at their thought patterns, you see that they are constantly switching back and forth between these different modes of thought that seem incompatible with each other. It creates kind of a paradox. For example, they seem very sensitive but also very tough and are able to overcome the obstacles to achieve their goals. Creativity involves periods of downtime and reflection as well as periods of openness and deliberation and trying to make something practical and tenable. So having messy minds contributes to the messy creative process. LH: Can you briefly explain some additional paradoxes you mention in your book, starting with mindfulness vs. daydreaming? Scott: Creative people will often be very mindful of their surroundings and attentive and focused, and they will also be open to long periods of daydreaming and mind wandering. LH: What about solitude vs. collaboration? Scott: Creative processes benefit from both solitude and collaboration. With solitude it is particularly important to get a lot of ideas down on paper and for there to be no judgment....Collaboration is an important stage of being able to present your ideas to get feedback and additional inspiration from the audience. LH: Finally, what about seriousness vs. play? Scott: Creative people are serious about their work and their goals, but the process they use to reach those goals is trial-and-error. When they talk about their passions, creative people are very intense, but they tend to be very playful with their ideas and present various ways of looking at a situation. LH: Are you saying that contradiction is a hallmark of creative minds? Scott: Yes. You find that creative minds are messy in the sense that they are flexible in switching between different ways of thinking. It’s important to their creative process to have that flexibility because creativity itself is a messy process. I think we really need to be open to the messiness of the process without trying to find the one secret to creativity. LH: What else do we need to learn about messy minds? Scott: I think society in general should appreciate messy minds more. We value efficiency so much (like in our schools with standardized tests), but I don’t think this emphasis on efficiency is producing optimal creativity and innovation. A key point I want to make is that messy minds are characterized by their variability and trial and error, not by their efficiency.
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Try visioning to access your higher self in this powerful meditation.

7 Steps to Unlock Your True Potential

What is your life’s true purpose? Many of us on the path to self-improvement and greater happiness have pondered this question. But have you ever sat down, in the quiet, and waited for an answer? Visioning is a tool that may help you find that answer. “Just as the oak tree is already within the acorn, there are gifts of divinity, beauty, love and harmony that are already within you. Life visioning allows you to become available to that information,” explains Michael Bernard Beckwith, a best-selling author and the founder of Agape International Spiritual Center in Los Angeles. Similar to guided meditation, visioning allows you to tap into your higher intelligence, or “superconscious,” to discover those unique gifts. Visioning differs from visualization, which focuses on a particular outcome (affirmations to attract a life partner or imagine your perfect job, for example). By contrast, visioning has you ask yourself questions that open you to receiving information and insights from your higher mind. Follow Michael’s seven steps to a passionate, purposeful life: 1. Get centered Let the worries of the day fall away. If your mind wanders to your to-do list or what you’re going to eat later, gently pull it back to the present. Call forth a feeling of unconditional love. Let it envelop your entire being. 2. Place a question before your higher self. Ask for the vision: What is the highest purpose for my life? My project? Don’t force an answer. Allow images, thoughts and ideas to emerge. Write down everything that comes to mind. 3. What qualities must I cultivate to manifest this vision? In his book Life Visioning: A Transformative Process for Activating Your Unique Gifts and Highest Potential, Michael writes that this step is pivotal. You may need to change in certain ways to realize your purpose and dreams. Be honest with yourself about how. 4. What qualities must I let go of? Acknowledge the limiting beliefs that hold you back from realizing your full potential. Those beliefs served their purpose. Now it’s time to let them go. 5. What qualities do I already possess that will serve this vision? Recognize your special talents and positive attributes. 6. Say yes to what comes through. Be willing to receive the vision. 7. Express gratitude for the vision. Close with a feeling of thanksgiving. Know that like the acorn and the oak tree, your inborn talents and traits make your vision for the future entirely possible. How does that feel? Don’t expect a detailed outline for your future from one session. If you only receive a word, phrase or feeling, that’s OK. As you remain open and receptive, additional thoughts and ideas may appear as time goes on to pull you closer to your true purpose. Michael explains that even if the vision seems nebulous at first, it guides you toward the right action steps. Let it pull you toward the exciting life purpose that’s been waiting for you all along.
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More tips on tidying up from decluttering expert Marie Kondo

Marie Kondo’s New De-cluttering Book Sparks Joy

“Only keep items that spark joy” is the basic tenet of Marie Kondo, the Japanese decluttering guru whose first book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, has sold more than 2.2 million copies. Last May, I wrote about applying the “KonMari Method” to my closet. All these months later, I’m still finding it a lot easier to get dressed. Every garment on my hangers—facing the same direction of course—is something that I enjoy wearing, and is free of wrinkles, moth holes and stains. The life-changing magic of origami underwear Now Marie has a second book out: Spark Joy: An Illustrated Master Class on the Art of Organizing and Tidying Up is a detailed dive into her techniques. Here, she provides diagrams of her edict to “fold clothes like origami.” The method begins with gazing intently at your T-shirt, undies or socks to “find the rectangular shape within it” and then taking the pieces on the outside of that rectangle and folding them inside it. Done properly you end up with perfectly smooth compact rectangles that you can stand upright in your drawers. Before you store the garments, Kondo advises performing a test. Place each garment upright on the floor. If it doesn’t fall over when you remove your hand, it’s ready to be stored. If it collapses—a likely outcome for the first few hundred tries—the folds need readjusting. (Between you and me, the underwear in my lingerie drawers look nothing like macaroons standing upright in a French pastry shop, as Marie describes.) Unclog the chi (energy) in your entire house In Spark Joy, Marie also offers guidance on tidying up other areas of your home and office, including kitchen cabinets, bathroom vanities, children’s toys, laundry supplies, books, paper and what she calls sentimental items. She can be a stern taskmaster. If you’re holding on to a school uniform from your blissful academy days, she suggests you try wearing it and “lose yourself in memories of your youth.” (It doesn’t seem to occur to the lithe Marie that you might not actually be able to fit into the decades-old uniform.)  “Most of my clients who do this come to their senses and discard it,” she says. And she likewise suggests getting rid of mementos from past loves—gifts, letters, photo-booth strips—especially if you’re hoping to develop a relationship with someone new. Thank these items for the wonderful memories, she suggests, “and part with them with gratitude.” Tidying up, Marie says, is more than surface deep. It can be transformative. And you begin to really enjoy your life. Want to get started? Here are the six basic steps: 1. Commit to tidying up Marie doesn’t underestimate the amount of effort her program requires. She says it will take six hours to tidy up your desk alone. But, as she points out, the average person spends about 30 minutes a day searching for things, while the chronically messy can waste as much as two hours a day. 2. Visualize your ideal home Find a photo in a magazine that captures the kind of house you want to live in. “When you imagine your ideal lifestyle,” Marie writes, “you are actually clarifying why you want to tidy,” and it can represent a huge turning point in your life. 3. Discard first Before you begin to store anything, decide what you’re going to toss out or give away to clear out the space. 4. Tidy by category, not location Don’t think of tidying up your bedroom or office. When people work room by room, all we end up doing is shuffling stuff from one area of the home to another. Instead, gather all your clothes, books or papers from all areas of your home; discard what you don’t need, then reorganize and store the rest. 5. Go in order Go category by category in this sequence: clothes, books, paper, miscellany and, finally, sentimental items. (You don’t want to touch those old love letters and other nostalgic trinkets until you’ve perfected the art of discarding clothes, books and papers first.) 6. Ask yourself if it sparks joy This is the key to Marie’s method. Hold each item firmly in both hands and ask yourself if it sparks joy. “When something sparks joy, you should feel a little thrill, as if the cells in your body are slowly rising,” she says. “When you hold something that doesn’t bring you joy, however, you will notice that your body feels heavier.” And, remember, you’re not choosing what to discard, but what to keep. Shelley Levitt is an editor at large for Live Happy.
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International Day of Happiness in Renton, WA

Happy Days Are Here

The joy was in full bloom as people around the globe celebrated the International Day of Happiness. More than 70 cities hosted events and activities built around Live Happy’s #HappyActs Walls, where people could post a card that explained how they share happiness. (For each card posted, Live Happy donated $1 to that area’s Big Brothers Big Sisters chapter.) From Brazil to Honolulu—and many points in between—activities including live music, student performances, line dancing, face painting, interactive art events and more helped make the day fun, whether it was in New York City, Detroit, Los Angeles, Cincinnati or Dallas. In New York City, observance of the happiest day of the year began early with a panel discussion at the United Nations on March 17 about well-being and gender equality. Following the U.N. panel, Live Happy CEO and Co-Founder Deborah K. Heisz hosted a fireside chat in the U.N. Bookshop about her new book, Live Happy: Ten Practices for Choosing Joy. And, just in time for the International Day of Happiness, the Sustainable Development Solutions Network released its 2016 World Happiness Report. The annual report, based on a survey of 156 countries, found that the U.S. had jumped up two spots in its overall happiness rankings, now landing at No. 13 worldwide. And, at celebrations all across the country, that happiness showed. Waves of happiness in Manhattan Beach Derek Edmonds, a Manhattan Beach, California, fire captain for more than two decades, knows what a joyful place this surf-side city is on sunny Sunday afternoons in spring. But even he was dazzled by the buckets of bliss he witnessed when he paid a visit in his firetruck to the Happiness Wall at the playground of the Manhattan Beach Middle School. “Look at all this!” he exclaimed. He opened his arms to embrace a scene that included brightly costumed girls from the local Le Petit Cirque troupe walking on stilts; kids gleefully slurping snow cones, riding their tricycles or having their faces painted; and families wearing oversized orange or purple glasses posing for photos in front of the wall, the youngsters clutching balloons or blowing bubbles. “I can’t imagine being anywhere else today,” Derek said. Neither could Sherri Saum, a star of the family TV drama The Fosters. “We can all use a little more happiness in our lives,” she said. “It’s a simple concept but a powerful one.” The mom of twin 2-year-old sons pledged to “fill my house with music” and “make a point each day to create a life of meaning and joy.” Jeryl Prescott, an actress who’s been a frequent guest star on hit shows like Madame Secretary, Ray Donovan and The Walking Dead, came here with her 10- and 12-year-old sons. Before she turned to acting, Jeryl had earned a Ph.D. in literature and taught at Wake Forest University in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. Her happy act reflects her lifelong passion for education: “Teaching, learning and sharing with diverse populations.” After posting their Happy Acts, many thirsty celebrators, including Mayor Mark Burton, made a stop at the lemonade stand that benefited the local Big Brothers Big Sisters organization. Big Brother Jackson Marshall had pledged that he would be “smiling more at everyone and making jokes that bring laughter to others.” But it was two little girls, 8-year-old Rachel and Maren, 7, who shared what was probably the truest way to spread happiness. “Letting anyone play with me,” Rachel had written on the card she posted to the Happiness Wall. “Some people don’t have anyone to play with them,” she explained. Kids who are shunned by others are welcome to join Rachel in jump rope or four square, her two favorite games. A few minutes later, Maren wrote she would spread happiness by “including everyone.” When she sees a little girl or boy standing alone during recess, she poses a question that can stand as an example of generosity to us all: “Do you want to play with me?” Smiles for umbrellas in Cincinnati Chilly temperatures and a wet, windy day didn’t dampen the spirits of those who came out to celebrate at Fountain Square in Cincinnati. Although rains swept through the area just as the event was about to begin, the small crowd simply huddled together under tents and waited for the weather to clear. “Even with the rain and the cold, we had an awesome day of sharing and spreading happiness in Cincinnati,” said Susan Holt, wall captain and co-chair of the Cincinnati event. “Lots of smiles and laughs! I was grateful to be part of such a wonderful day.” When the rains eased to a drizzle, cheerleaders from Shroder Paideia High School performed, leading the entire crowd in a cheer, “We are HAPPY!” “Big John” Drury, the “Dancin’ Trucker,” fired up the music and led everyone in a line dance that began with Walk the Moon’s hit, “Shut Up and Dance,” then led into Pharrell Williams’ hit song, “Happy.” “It might be cold and wet, but that’s no reason not to dance,” Big John said with his ever-present smile. Who Dey, the mascot for the Bengals, joined the party, much to the delight of the crowd. He gave out hugs and posed for pictures, then he and Big John decided it was time for more dancing and took over the square to show off their moves. Judi Winall, a certified laughter yoga instructor, wasn’t about to let the weather keep the crowd from laughing. “You can’t help but have fun when doing laughter yoga, regardless of the conditions around you, because it’s about unconditional laughter,” said Judi. She led the group, including Who Dey, in a spirited and hilarious session of laughter yoga. Laughter yoga led to, of course, more dancing, and the drum line from Withrow University High School also joined in the fun, showing off their skills on the skins and drawing more intrigued passersby. While the day didn’t go exactly as planned, Susan and her co-chair, Mary Miller, agreed that they had accomplished what they set out to do: raise awareness about the International Day of Happiness and bring more joy to the city. “It was great to spread happiness, even when the weather did not cooperate,” Mary said. “That happens in life, and it is so much better to be focused on the result rather than the circumstances.”
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7 Books That Will Change Your Work Life

7 Books to Spark Your Career Reboot

We spend so much of our lives at work. When you dread your job and you find yourself clock-watching, that unhappiness can easily spill over to life outside of work. Whether you are in need of a career shift or a complete makeover, here are seven amazing books to change your work life. Turn your passion into your profession. Smarter Faster Better: The Secrets of Being Productive in Life and Business By Charles Duhigg Journalist Charles Duhigg explores how you can get more done without having to sacrifice what you care about most. Strengthen your internal locus of control (self-accountability). Researchers have found that this sense of personal responsibility is correlated with academic success, higher self-motivation, lower incidences of stress and depression and a longer life span. Practice this learned skill by taking actions that put you in control and express your values. Are You Fully Charged? The 3 Keys to Energizing Your Work and Life By Tom Rath Create meaning with small wins each day. Your greatest potential for growth and development lies in the area where you already have natural talent. Double down on your talents and spend your time doing what you can do better than anyone in the world. Practice, build your skills and your knowledge. Create positive experiences with the people who mean the most to you. How you eat, move and sleep are all essential to having more energy throughout the day. Make sure you are doing all three well in order to be your best for work, your family and your friends. The Art of Work: A Proven Path to Discovering What You Were Meant To Do By Jeff Goins Live a life that matters by discovering what you were born and meant to do. This book will help you get on the path to your life’s work. Jeff writes that knowing our passion is just the beginning, and that figuring out your purpose is also about where your interests intersect and connect with the needs of the world. We can live for a larger purpose when we are brave enough to try. Do Over: Rescue Monday, Reinvent Your Work, and Never Get Stuck By Jon Acuff Need a career do-over? Whether you are 22 or 62, you already have everything you need for an amazing career. Jon Acuff writes that all great careers have four elements in common: relationships, skills, character and hustle. Find out how to amplify each of these areas to reinvent your work and get unstuck. You can even rescue your Mondays as you discover how to work toward the job you’ve always wanted. The Achievement Habit: Stop Wishing, Start Doing, and Take Control of Your Life By Bernard Roth Discover how to use design thinking to fulfill goals and overcome obstacles that hinder you from reaching your potential. Achievement can be learned. It’s a muscle, and once you learn how to flex it, you’ll be able to meet life’s challenges and fulfill your goals. Build resiliency by reinforcing what you do rather than what you accomplish. Soon you will say goodbye to excuses, and see yourself as a doer and achiever. Workplace Wellness that Works: 10 Steps to Infuse Well-Being and Vitality into Any Organization By Laura Putnam Discover how to promote an overall culture of well-being throughout your organization. Based on the latest research using real-world examples, this guide provides employers with the tools to make a difference in their employees' health and happiness. Learn how to assess your organization's needs and craft a plan that actually benefits employees by empowering them to make better choices. Love Your Job: The New Rules for Career Happiness By Kerry Hannon Learn how to identify the little things that make work enjoyable and engaging. You won’t have to watch the clock anymore to get through workday doldrums. Kerry Hannon focuses on the little things that can make a big difference in how we feel about work. Invigorate your day by challenging old routines, learning new habits and changing your thought patterns. Celebrate small successes and get an entrepreneurial mindset. Possibilities await you. Sandra Bilbray is a regular contributor to Live Happy and the founder and CEO of TheMediaConcierge.net.
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Happiness Around the Clock

Happiness Around the Clock

There are 1,440 minutes in a day, and while we can’t expect every moment to be blissful, we each have the means to increase our sense of joy, connection and well-being in our daily lives. Two main strategies will help you achieve this. One, through simple actions you can train your brain to “tilt toward positivity,” says neuroscientist Alex Korb, Ph.D., author of The Upward Spiral: Using Neuroscience to Reverse the Course of Depression, One Small Change at a Time. Two, you can live more harmoniously with your body’s natural rhythms by aligning activities like eating, sleeping and when you turn on and off the lights to your circadian clock. Throughout the day this built-in internal timer regulates everything from body temperature to the release of hunger hormones. Follow these cues and you’ll flourish, disrupt them and you’ll experience an avalanche of disturbances, from insomnia and weight gain to foggy thinking and depression. “Circadian rhythm hygiene is every bit as important to good health as washing your hands,” says Christopher Colwell, Ph.D., director of the Laboratory of Circadian and Sleep Medicine at the University of California, Los Angeles. With expert advice, we’ve put together a template of what these two strategies would look like in an average day. Consider it a tick-tock of contentment. Adjust the timing to your needs but try to follow the general principles for a week or two. You’ll likely find you experience more happy moments each and every day. 6:30 a.m.: Wake up to an alarm clock that mimics the rising sun. A study published in the European Journal of Applied Physiology shows that gradual light exposure during the last 30 minutes of sleep can increase alertness, enhance both mental and physical performance, and improve mood. The Soleil Sleep Spa and the Philips Wake-Up Light both combine dawn simulation with nature sounds like morning birds or ocean waves. 6:45 a.m.: Devote a few minutes before you get out of bed to a mindful check-in. Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D., author of MBSR Every Day: Daily Practices from the Heart of Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, suggests asking yourself questions like, “How am I starting this day? How is my body feeling? How am I feeling emotionally?” If you notice you’re tense, Elisha suggests widening your arms to expand your chest, opening your mouth a few times to stretch out the jaw muscles and dropping your shoulders. “You want to begin your day from a place of ease,” Elisha says. 6:50 a.m.: Make Your bed. This simple act creates a small sense of satisfaction and pride that sets a positive tone for the rest of your day. Charles Duhigg, author of the best-selling book The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business, notes that a daily tidying of the sheets correlates to better productivity and a greater sense of well-being. 7 a.m.: Shower with intention and attention. “Mindful showers have transformed my life,” Elisha says. “I always thought of the morning shower as one of those daily tasks you have to do.” That changed when he bought a bar of rose-scented soap. The fragrance evoked sensory memories of the summers he spent at his grandmother’s house in Burlington, Vermont, and summoned feelings of love, warmth and comfort. Now, Elisha begins his showers by holding the bar of soap, inhaling its scent for a few deep breaths and paying attention to the feeling of the warm water against his skin. “The small splurge on a special soap is a way of taking care of yourself, and that can boost your feelings of self-worth,” he says. 7:30 a.m.: Eat breakfast within the first two hours of waking up. “Delaying any longer than that and you’re skipping a meal, and that depletes your physical and mental energy,” says Lisa Dierks, a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist with the Mayo Clinic Healthy Living Program. The ideal breakfast will include a protein, a grain and a fruit or vegetable. For example, plain Greek yogurt topped with berries and low-sugar granola. 8 a.m.: Take your first 10-minute dose of daily exercise. Don’t have time for a lengthy workout every day? No sweat! Shorter bouts of exercise can boost your well-being just as effectively as a single sustained session. Maybe even more. One recent study at the Healthy Lifestyles Research Center at Arizona State University showed that walking briskly for 10 minutes, three times a day, was significantly more effective in lowering blood pressure than a single half-hour session. 8:30 a.m.: Find ease during your morning commute. Whether we battle bumper-to-bumper traffic or crowded subway cars, the commute to work can be stressful. The road to relaxation? Cultivating a sense of community with your fellow commuters. When Elisha finds himself getting tense on the drive to Los Angeles’ Center for Mindful Living, which he co-founded and where he practices as a clinical psychologist, he turns inward rather than venting at the drivers around him. “I ask myself, ‘What am I really needing right now? What are the other drivers around me needing?’ ” The answer often leads him to silently recite, “May we all have more ease and patience in this traffic.” This creates a shift, Elisha says, “that completely transforms my experience. I go from disconnection to connection and the whole frustrated mind seems to dissipate.” 9 a.m.: Center yourself before you transition to a new activity. We often carry around the equivalent of an emotional doggy bag as we move through our day, bringing the stress of a harried morning to an important meeting or the fatigue of a three-hour business meeting to giving our kids a bath. “A lot of time our focus gets stolen,” says Sam Chase, author of Yoga & the Pursuit of Happiness and co-owner of New York’s Yoga to the People studio. To begin a new activity fully present, he suggests slowing down for a moment of transition. “When I’m about to go into a new situation, I’ll pause and take three breaths right at the doorway,” he says. “That helps me let go of what I was doing and open myself up to whatever I’m entering without distraction.” 12:30 p.m.: Choose a true happy meal for lunch. Skip the fast food and opt for a mix of protein, veggies, whole grains and healthy plant-based fats like those found in avocados or olive oil. “I think of food as edible happiness,” says chef and nutritionist Karen Wang Diggs, author of Happy Foods: Over 100 Mood-Boosting Recipes. “On the most fundamental level, food, beyond just sustaining us, has the capacity to nourish us on a deeper level.” When we eat heavily processed meals that are heavy in refined carbs, like white rice or pasta, and sugar, we set in motion a series of physiological responses that lead to the release of stress hormones, mood swings, fatigue, and, as a recent study in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition showed, a higher risk of depression. 1 p.m.: Take your second dose of daily exercise. Want to get even more benefit from your brisk walk? Seek out some greenery—a tree-lined street, a local park, an urban garden amid city skyscrapers. Studies show that a walk in nature reduces activity in the part of the brain associated with rumination, that endless loop of doomsday thinking and self-reproach. Another way to put more bounce in your step is to share your walk with a co-worker or two. Strong relationships with co-workers are one of the most important factors in workplace satisfaction. 3 p.m.: Beat the mid-late afternoon slump with a healthy alternative to a sugary snack. Karen suggests half an avocado with a sprinkling of sea salt and a dash of lemon juice; a slice of turkey or ham wrapped in a romaine lettuce leaf or ½ cup full-fat yogurt with a tablespoon of sunflower seeds. Instead of a cup of coffee—caffeine after 2 p.m. can interfere with sleep—try this energizing alternative: Keep a bottle of an essential oil, like rosemary or peppermint, in your desk drawer or purse. Place three drops in the palm of your hands, rub them together, hold your palms up to your face and inhale deeply for three breaths. 4:30 p.m.: Pause for a moment to consider your personal values. Make a habit of taking a break from meetings and emails for a moment of self-reflection and inspiration. Erica Brown, a Jewish scholar and educator, suggests thinking about a different aspiration or emotion each day. In her new book Take Your Soul to Work: 365 Meditations on Every Day Leadership, she suggests pondering questions like, “What does your authentic self look like when no one is looking?” “When is the last time you shared something of beauty with those who work with you?” and “Name something you love so much that it can never fail you.”6 p.m.: Build a better to-do list. Before you leave your workplace for the day, create a to-do list for tomorrow. Along with jotting down the tasks you need to complete, make sure you’re carving out time in your day for things you love to do. Researcher Lahnna Catalino, Ph.D., of the University of California, San Francisco, School of Medicine, calls this “prioritizing positivity.” Her research shows that it’s a far more effective tactic for achieving happiness than striving to feel joy, contentment, gratitude or peace every second of the day. Prioritizing positivity means different things to different people, Lahnna says. Two activities that elicit positive emotions in most people are connecting with a loved one and doing something physically active. 7 p.m.: Enjoy dinner with family or friends. Close relationships with other people are a keystone to happiness, and the dinner table is a natural place for connecting. A new study of more than 11,000 adults shows that face-to-face interactions with friends and family members offer powerful protection against depression; contact by phone, text or emails don’t have the same power. Plus, a slew of studies have shown family meals lead to a wide range of benefits, including better grades and fewer incidences of behavior like smoking and drinking in teens. 7:30 p.m.: Close down your kitchen. Scientists are discovering that when you eat is nearly as important as what you eat. “Our bodies are designed to take in calories over 12 hours and fast for 12, says Christopher, the neuroscientist. Research at the Salk Institute for Biological Studies in San Diego has shown that disrupting this natural order by, say, snacking at midnight or 2 a.m. leads not only to poor sleep and weight gain but also to the kind of metabolic disorders seen in people with diabetes. Now, a study just completed at Christopher’s lab suggests that mistimed eating can also impair memory and learning. 8 p.m.: Take your final dose of exercise. Go for a post-dinner stroll but avoid intense aerobic exercise. We fall asleep when our core body temperature drops, says Christopher, and when you do a heavy workout you raise the body temperature, thwarting slumber. 9 p.m.: Eliminate sources of blue light two hours before you hit the hay. “Light is a huge anchor for sleep,” says Colleen Ehrnstrom, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist with the Department of Veterans Affairs in Denver, and co-author of the upcoming book End the Insomnia Struggle (coming October 2016). Just as the light of dawn awakens us, the dimming of light cues our body to produce melatonin, a hormone that quiets alertness and preps us for slumber. The kind of blue light that’s emitted by our electronics devices is especially disruptive. You can filter out some of the blue light by lowering the brightness of your screen, donning glasses with orange lenses or covering your screens with an orange filter. (You can find a range of products at lowbluelights.com.) 10:30 p.m.: Transition to bedtime with a nightly ritual. “We often think that going to sleep is like shutting off a computer,” Alex says. “You just hit the power button and you shut your brain down. But, in fact, your brain requires a little more time to relax and unwind.” Along with brushing your teeth and cleansing your skin, prime yourself for sleep with simple yoga stretches, prayer or meditation. 11 p.m.: Lights out. Spend your last few minutes of wakefulness noting a few things that you’re grateful for. These can be both big—the good health of your family—and small—the lemons ripening on your windowsill. Keeping a gratitude list will make you more optimistic, healthier and alert. You’ll also be more likely to make progress toward an important personal goal and more likely to help others. Shelley Levitt is an editor at large for Live Happy magazine.
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Create a Family Happiness Board!

Whether you are part of a traditional family, or have a group of friends who are as close as family, chances are you derive a significant portion of your happiness from spending time and sharing experiences with the ones you love. Science tells us that looking forward to those experiences as well as reflecting on joyful memories generates a boost to your well-being that is almost equal to the experience itself! Bringing happiness back home As the editorial director of Live Happy, I’ve spoken at the United Nations and traveled the world as an ambassador for the importance of happiness in our lives. Now I am bringing the message back home with the Family Happiness Board—and I’d like to invite you to make one, too! A happiness board not only reflects past joyful moments, but it works as a reminder of what we love and how we can share happiness with the world around us. Here’s how I—and Live Happy contributing editor Sandra Bienkowski—put ours together. Please share photos of your boards with us using the hashtag #HappyActs on Twitter or Instagram. It’s also easy and fun to do. First, have each member of your family reflect on three questions: What makes me happy? What makes my family happy? What can we do together to make the world a happier place? Discuss the answers, and then get started making your board. Gather photos, quotes, mementos and other items that are meaningful and reflect on those times when you’ve been the happiest. I created a board with my family, and it was a blast. My children love to stare at it and talk about what every detail means to them. They point to the pictures and reminisce about vacations we took years ago. When we look at it together, it is an opportunity to go over what we do as a family to make others happy through our church, scouts or Live Happy’s #HappyActs campaign. Seeing the board hanging on the wall every day is both a reminder of great memories and a signal to do more to bring happiness to each other and to our community. It definitely raised the Gross National Happiness quotient in my house, and I highly recommend you give it a try, too. For more information on the International Day of Happiness on March 20 and how you can be a part of it, check happyacts.org.
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