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Josh Radnor by vagueonthehow, on Flickr

Josh Radnor Talks About His Directing Philosophy

Excerpt from Josh Radnor interview (original full story):I watch some of these movie previews and I think, “My God, kids are watching this!” So I really consider what characters I want to bring to life. I’m obsessed with content and what we put out into the collective consciousness, so I have really strict standards about what I’ll do. Ultimately, the only real power I have is to say no. So I’m very proud of my résumé. But I love giving my film characters a real tangle and then watching how they manage to triumph. I write for actors. I write really juicy parts.I’ve learned a lot about real life from directing movies. For instance, I’ve learned about leadership. At the base of it is love—love for the project and a deep gratitude to the people involved in bringing it to life, but I’ve learned that sometimes sternness is also required. I also learned a lot from some wonderful mentors early on who let me believe I could do something that felt impossible at the time... be a professional actor. When you achieve something like that, suddenly all things seem possible.Somehow I knew that in order for me to keep my sanity as an actor, I needed to confront my mind and create a new relationship with it, so I’ve been meditating for nine years. It helps me to have a practice where I can watch my thoughts and learn not to react or identify with them. I call it serene self-observation; it’s a lifelong process—serene being the key word here. I should add that I fail at this regularly. But there’s a place beneath the madness that is calm, alert and awakened. This is the place I try to access and act from. It’s our natural state, our “Being.” I find it so useful to check in with myself and ask questions.“What am I being in this moment? What am I contributing? Am I asleep or am I awake?” Each of us—in every moment—is making a contribution to the world by our thoughts, words and actions. I think we underestimate how much power we have. Whatever qualities we wish the world to embody, we have to embody in ourselves. I believe that’s how we change the world. Not by hoping or wishing or delegating, but by being that change. I’m working hard to embody that change through the movies I make by offering a more inspiring, uplifting point of view. Too many people are already calling attention to the dark and dysfunctional.Pat Lavin is a Certified Hypnotherapist and Life Coach. Her inspirational and insightful articles, essays and interviews have appeared in publications throughout the country.
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Young woman traveling the world.

3 Lessons from Traveling That Lead to Happiness

After graduating from college I took off to explore Europe for four months with one of my best friends. We backpacked through 14 countries and learned things about the world and ourselves that we never expected. We often joked that we learned more about life and ourselves traveling abroad for four months than we did going to school for four years in college. When you’re traveling, you get a whole new perspective on what really matters, and you feel this sense of adventure and excitement that reminds you just how many possibilities you have in life. Still infected with the travel bug, I decided last year to spend six weeks with a good friend in China. In the land of Buddhas, bikes and chopsticks, I remembered three important lessons that have helped me find happiness and fulfillment in everyday life. 1. Great things can happen when you’re flexible. When you’re traveling, you expect there to be bumps in the road, or unexpected surprises, and that’s what makes it so exciting. If everything went as planned, you wouldn’t have a story to tell other than “I saw the Great Wall of China, and it was large.” If you’re being flexible, you open yourself up to opportunities that sometimes can stem from a single moment gone wrong. My friend and I booked a few nights in a hostel in Yangshuo a week ahead of time with plans to stay in the same room together. Things didn’t quite work out as we planned. The management gave our room away, which meant we’d need to stay in separate rooms for a few nights. So we did, without complaint. This is how we met Ping Ping, who worked at the hostel front desk. Because we were flexible, understanding and patient, Ping Ping took to us and gave us an authentic experience we wouldn’t have had otherwise. She became our friend, confidante and tour guide. We spent several nights in her father’s house in her hometown, where we cooked with her family and shared the meal. We played basketball with local kids at a nearby school and toured a sacred Buddhist temple with her brother. Ping Ping gave us the opportunity to see life in China well off the tourist grid—and she also gave us the chance to really know her. Not just as the person who checked us into our hostel, but as a genuine friend. It all happened because we were willing and happy to go with the flow. It’s not always easy to be flexible in life. We sometimes get attached to rigid ideas of how things should work out, personally or professionally, but this can backfire and end up limiting us. When you’re adaptable, you open yourself up to possibilities that you might not even know are available to you. 2. Life is a lot more beautiful and manageable when you proactively create moments of awe. One of my favorite things about traveling is when I experience a moment of awe. In Yangshuo, I biked through a fairytale land, full of water buffaloes and small villages, surrounded by mountains curved like something out of a Dr. Seuss book. It was truly breathtaking. However, the most amazing moment happened when I put my bike on the back of a bamboo raft and sailed down the river back to Yangshuo. The light from the day was fading away, and all that was left was the sound of nature and the stirring reflection of the Karst Mountain peaks on the water. It was then that a feeling of calm came over me. My thoughts were pure. I felt fortunate to have this experience, and at the same time I felt so small. I couldn’t help but feel unbridled joy and freedom. Everything in life seemed so easy—and, for a moment, I was problem-less. It doesn’t take something as grand as the Lijiang River, but for me, this feeling often comes from nature. Maybe it’s a beautiful setting that does it for you. Or an intimate, meaningful conversation with someone else—someone who is going through something just like you are, who makes you realize you are not alone. These moments, when you remember you’re part of something much bigger than you, ignite a sense of awe. They’re humbling, and if you let them wash over you, you’ll feel a sense of connection and peace that makes all your problems seem manageable. We need to choose to create those moments—to get out of homes, and out of our heads, and into the great, big world together. 3. You have to let go of where you were to get where you can be. When I was young, my mother used to tell me and my brother to wave goodbye to places when we left them. If we were at the ocean, she would say, “Wave goodbye to the ocean!” I remember waving goodbye and feeling the car rolling over the hill, and then it was gone. I didn’t know if I’d ever see it again. After spending two days in Dunhuang, riding camels through the desert, savoring the culinary delight of another region, and exploring the Mogao Caves, we headed back to the train. It was a 24-hour ride to our next destination. As the train started to slowly move forward and gain speed, I looked out the window and waved goodbye (in my mind—didn’t want the Chinese family sharing a train cabin with me to think I was crazy). I was there only two days. I had seen only a few of the 492 temples in the “Caves of the thousand Buddhas” and sampled only a few dishes of the local cuisine—yet I already had to move on. As the train was leaving, a part of me wanted to stay. I knew that I would most likely never see the desert oasis town of Dunhuang again. But I also knew I was heading somewhere else equally amazing. When you’re traveling, it’s easier to let go of a beautiful moment because you know the adventure continues. No matter what rolls by outside your window, there will inevitably be more to appreciate when you get off the train. In everyday life, when you leave a moment you loved, it’s tempting to cling to it—particularly when you’re headed back to work, or to a place you’ve been to many times before. We forget sometimes that waving goodbye to one beauty allows us to wave hello to another. We may not know for sure what that might be, but there’s always something good ahead if you’re open to recognizing and appreciating it. Benjamin Button said, “I was thinking how nothing lasts, and what a shame that is.” He’s right—they don’t. But it doesn’t have to be a shame if we enjoy each moment while we have the chance and stay open to the next adventure. It’s been over a year since I returned from my last journey abroad. Naturally, I’m itching to travel again. But the adventure continues nonetheless, and I am open to where it may lead. Ehren Prudhel is a writer and avid traveler. He recently co-created the online course Recreate Your Life Story: Change the Script and Be the Hero. This powerful program blends personal development and film to help people get unstuck and change their lives. ​
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Two People Mountain Biking

For a Good Mood, Get Outdoors

Before you lace up and head for the fitness center or the spare bedroom where you keep the treadmill, consider taking your sweat session outside. Along with fresh air, sweet smells and new sights, you’ll experience something else: happiness. University of Essex scientists found people who exercised outdoors for just five minutes improved their mood and reduced their stress, especially when working out near water. As the study describes, nature is a place we go to escape from the stress that won't leave us alone in modern life, and the "opportunity for relaxation and recreation has a positive influence on our emotional and physical well-being."Even better, physical activity has its benefits of positive physical and mental health. And according to the study's findings, participants "felt less stressed, more alert and alive, happier and more relaxed." When you combine physical activity and exposure to nature, this"green exercise"can be a calming activity with benefits of improving your psychological well-being and physical health. Walking with friends makes it a social event, and having the company of others only adds to that refreshing feeling. Green exercise could be your rejuvenating break from the real world.Don’t live near a lake or park? No sweat: After-work golf with a client, an early-morning tennis game with your business partner, or even just a lunchtime walk around the block counts toward your daily dose of nature.
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Family sitting at table and praying.

Give Thanks

Saying a blessing before meals is part of many religious faiths and may have been the motivation for prehistoric cave paintings, scientists say. As your family and friends gather around the holiday table, consider giving thanks with one of these blessings:Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs. Know that the Lord is God. It is he who made us, and we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.—Psalm 100Blessed art Thou, Lord our God, King of the universe who creates the fruit of the tree.—Jewish blessingFor flowers that bloom about our feet; for tender grass so fresh and sweet; for song of bird and hum of bee; for all things fair we hear and see, Father in Heaven, we thank thee!—Ralph Waldo EmersonBless all of those who have brought this nourishment to our table—through their labors and their lives.—Buddist blessingDeep peace of the running wave to you. Deep peace of the flowing air to you. Deep peace of the quiet earth to you. Deep peace of the shining stars to you. Deep peace of the Son of Peace to you.—Celtic blessingMay the Lord accept this, our offering, and bless our food that it may bring us strength in our body, vigor in our mind, and selfless devotion in our hearts for His service.—Swami Paramananda
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Why Cooking Makes Me Happy

I’m often taken by curiosity when I meet people who don’t give a thought about cooking. “When William’s not here,” a neighbor said to me the other day over a backyard glass of wine, “I don’t think about what I eat since he does the cooking. A can of green beans or a box of mac ’n’ cheese is fine with me.”Although I like Dana, I feel a little sorry for her. Barbra Streisand once sang these lyrics about being alone: “not to share a pair of pork chops/when you crave champagne and cheese.” When Dana is by herself there’s a missed opportunity for her to indulge herself in food she truly loves, whether she cooks it or treats herself to a meal in a restaurant.Because I do live alone, I only have myself to indulge food-wise. Sometimes dinner is a quick throw-together meal of pasta and sautéed veggies. Oftentimes it’s my favorite: a roasted chicken with roasted potatoes and carrots. On weekends there might be a cassoulet and the time to bake. And sometimes it’s champagne and cheese.This is what makes me happy. It’s not just the eating. It’s the decision making, often spontaneous while I’m shopping. It’s the prep. It’s the doing, the chopping, the slicing. It’s the aroma. And then, finally, it’s the eating.As a food writer, I suppose I should have charming childhood stories about cooking. But I don’t. My mother was a working mom—TV dinners, frozen potpies,and grilled cheese sandwiches were weeknight staples. She had a few special recipes she made on the weekends—chop suey with lots of exotic canned vegetables was one of them.My grandmas didn’t live near us, so there were no Sunday mornings spent baking cookies with one of them, or Sunday nights learning secret family recipes. Perhaps that is why when I started to cook on my own—a late bloomer in my 20s—it became a particular joy for me. And, as a friend once said to me, “It helps pass the time.”It does help pass the time. Cooking takes a little effort. Now that time is built into my day and I look forward to it. The time I spend cooking for myself (the time I spend cooking for others is also pleasurable, but that’s another story) is the time I use to think about the day, let the bad parts dissolve and the good parts revive and marinate a little, like the pork tenderloin I just put in the fridge in a bath of mustard, honey and a handful of herbs.Dare I speak like the baby-boomer-me-generation member that I am? Cooking makes me happy because it IS about me. It’s my selfish indulgence. It’s champagne and cheese, even when it’s not.StephenExelis a freelance food writer and editor whose work has appeared in Deck, Patio & Pool, Country Home and Figure. He is a contributing editor to Traditional Home magazine.
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